


Our words left unspoken

by Mojjochan



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Fluff, M/M, Romance, Smut, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-29
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2019-09-29 04:53:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 44,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17196887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mojjochan/pseuds/Mojjochan
Summary: Hanbin has had unrequited feelings towards his childhood friend Jiwon for years. When he gets formally introduced to Jiwon's girlfriend the wheels start to turn and Hanbin makes a painful decision.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Should update every weekend, most likely Friday.

Hanbin was leaned over his bowl of noodles when someone touched his shoulder suddenly.

“Hey, man.” Jiwon said cheerfully as he sat down opposite him, placing his tray down before throwing his bag into the seat next to him.

“Hey.” Hanbin said back after swallowing his food while throwing glances at Jiwon who was busy checking his phone.

“You busy today?” Jiwon asked as he started eating.

“When?” Hanbin asked his mouth full of food.

“At 6.” Jiwon replied while peering at him.

“Sure, I don't have anything. What're we doing?” Hanbin asked curiously.

“You'll see, but dinners on me.” Jiwon said enthusiastically flashing Hanbin with a big grin, which made Hanbin's heart skip a beat.

“C-cool.” Hanbin stuttered a little as he regained his composure.

They continued to eat while talking about various matters as friends would until Hanbin had to leave for class.

Once classes were over at five Hanbin pulled his phone out of his pocket and called Jiwon.

“Hey, classes are over. Where should I meet you?” Hanbin asked.

“Oh, nice timing. I was just heading out. I’ll pick you up. Just go to the corner next to the science building.” Jiwon said on the phone.

“OK. Sounds good. See you soon.” Hanbin replied before hanging up.

“Hey, Hanbin.” A familiar voice called.

Hanbin turned around to see Yunhyong coming towards him.

“Hey, Yunhyeong.” Hanbin gave him a calm smile.

Yunhyeong was a year older, the same age as Jiwon, but he was a returning student after doing his mandatory military service so he was in the same year and department as Hanbin.

However there were more things that they had in common.

“You look hapopy. How’re things with Jiwon, ou confessed yet?” Yunhyeong asked, as shamelessly as ever.

“NO.” Hanbin retorted feeling his face go red wth embarrassement.

Yunhyeong chortled.

“I know it’s scary, but believe me when I say that once you get it off your chest you can finally start moving on. Well,unless they actually return your feelings..” Yunhyeong said while chortling, covering his mouth with his hand.

“Sounds like some sort of fairytale or a drama.” Hanbin complained darkly.

“I know, right!” Yunhyeong laughed loudly while slapping Hanbin’s back hard.

“Well I gotta go.” Hanbin said calmly.

“Hey, I’ll walk you, I’ve got some time to kill before my job anyways.” Yunhyeong said and followed Hanbin.

Hanbin really couldn’’t refuse.

They. Arrived at the corner of the science building and stood there chatting, YU wss as always overly touchy, not that Hanbin disliked it, but Yunhyeong would always take things a bit too far.

Yunhyeong was clinging to him, his arms around Hanbin as Jiwon pulled up.

“Hey.” Jiwon called out coldly as he stepped out of the car, looking like he was about to come around and step in between them.

“Oh, Jiwon you’re here.” Hanbin called feeling a little flustered as ghe dislodged himself from Yunhyeong.

“Hii…” Yunhyeong saif in a friendly tone as he looked at Jiwon who was showing a strangely dark expression. 

Seeing Jiwon’s expression Hanbin hurriedly got into the car.

“Bye, Yunhyeong, see you tomorrow,” Hanbin said as he got into Jiwon’s car.

“Bye.” Yunhyeong said while waving at the them.

They drove off in silence.

Hanbin kept glancing over at Jiwon, who had a deep frown on his face.

“That guy… he has to be gay” Jiwon grumbled in a low voice.

Hanbin felty a pang in his chest, and he suddenly felt very nervous.

Even if Jiwon was normally quite open minded, when it came to things like dating he was quite traditional and very family oriented.

“Oh? I wouldn't know.” Hanbin lied as best he could, not looking at the other man.

“Just the air about it him, how clingy he is.” Jiwon continued.

Hanbin was well aware that Jiwon was against excessive amounts of skinship, he himself loved skinship, but he never showed that side of himself in front of Jiwon.

“Where are we going?” Hanbin asked abruptly trying to change the topic.

“Oh, we'll be there soon.” Jiwon replied calmly.

After a few more minutes they drove into a parking lot and got out.

Hanbin looked at Jiwon who quickly put his keys away and started walking with swift steps.

Hanbin trailed after him, looking around for wherever they might be going.

They turned a corner and suddenly a large restaurant was in front of them.

“Were here.” Jiwon said excitedly amd strode towards the door.

“Wait, is it really ok dressed like this?” Hanbin asked feeling flustered.

“No worries, you look nice.” Jiwon said as he spun around, with a soft grin on his face making Hanbin's heart skip a beat.

They entered the restaurant and were met by a server who asked if they had a reservation, which they apparently did as Jiwon smuggly announced his own name.

They were lead along to a table further in the back, they sat down opposite one another and took the menu from the server.

Some time passed in silence, but it was interrupted when Jiwon’s phone started rinigng.

He grabbed his phone and answered, he hastily got to his feet and walked towards the exit.

Hanbin looked after him, wondering if this meant that someone was joining them.

Hanbin looked down at the menu again, but he heard Jiwon’s voice so he looked back around.

He saw Jiwon first, then behind him he saw a woman he had never seen before.

She was pretty and looking at Jiwon with flirty eyes.

When he looked closer he saw that they were holding hands, the sight made Hanbin’s stomach sink and his heart ache.

“Hanbin” Jiwon called as the pair came up on their table.

“This is Mina, she is my girlfriend.” Jiwon said with a big grin on his face, looking at Mina who blushed a little as he said it, covering her mouth with her hand.

Hnabin felt as if someone had just poured a bucket of cold water over him.

His shocked silence went unnoticed by the two who were completely preoccupied by one another

Hanbin was able to return to his senses before either of them noticed.

He stood up and reach out his hand towards Mina, who flashed him with a bright smile.

“I’m Hanbin.” He said and nodded a little.

“Nice to me you, Jiwon’s told me so much about you.” She said, he found her cheerfulness was a bit much, but Hanbin forced himself to smile back at her.

“Can’t say the same about you.” Hanbin thought to himself as he couldn’t recall a single instance where Jiwon had mentioned anything about seeing a girl.

Jiwon lead her to sit down next to him and they continued to speak really sweetly with one another, Hanbin continued to watch them as he sat on the opposite side.

They ordered their food and fell back into conversation.

Hanbin tried not to pay too much attention to what was happening in front of him, but it was difficult as every sweetly uttered word was like a jab to his upper body.

“So..” hanbin interrupted the two, who looked at him before he continued to speak.

“How long have you two… been a thing?” Hanbin couldn’t make himself utter the word couple or dating. 

“Hm… about three months I guess…?” Jiwon mumbled, grinning stupidly.

“Yeah, but we’ve been chatting on katalk for a while before that though…” Mina added, leaning on Jiwon’s shoulder.

Hanbin felt sick, but luckily the conversation was interrupted by their food arriving.

Hanbin barely ate, he actually felt kinda nauseous.

Watching Jiwon seemingly completely infatuated with someone was too much to bear.

Hanbin wanted an excuse to get away.

Suddenly his phone rang, it took a plit second to register so when he finally realized it was ringing he fumbled to get it out of his pocket.

He looked at the screen and saw that it was from Yunhyeong.

Feeling relieved Hanbin hastily answered the phone.

“Yunhyeong.” He said in a relieved voice.

While he wasn’t paying attention to Jiwon the other man’s brows narrowed as he suddenly focused on Hanbin.

Hanbin suddenly looked his way, and their eyes met.

“Sorry, I’m gonna take this call.” Hanbin said as he got to his feet.

“Sure…” Jiwon grumbled, but he seemed oddly displeased.

Hanbin frowned at him, but left anyways.

“Hey, Yunhyeong.” Hanin said enthusiastically, he was glad to have an excuse to leave the table.

[“Hey, I’m I calling at a bad time?”] Yunhyeong asked.

“No, your timing couldn’t have been any better.” Hanbin confessed.

[“You sound like you wanna get out of there.”] Yunhyeong chortled.

“Yeah. I’m a third wheel here…” Hanbin sighed leaning against the wall, admitting it made his chest sting.

[“Third wheel?”] Yunhyeong sounded confused.

“Yeah, get this. He invited me out… to introduce me to his girlfriend…” Hanbin could feel his voice cracking as he tried to hold back tears.

[“Ah dude, I’m so sorry. Want me to meet you somewhere?”] Yunhyeong sounded concerned.

Hanbin thought about it for a moment, he could excse himself from this painful situation.

“You know what… I’d appreciate it a lot actually. Let’s meet in front of the station. I’ll just go and wait for you, I don\t think I can stay here much longer.” Hanbin said, wiping at his face in case he had tears in his eyes.

[“OK. See you there.”] Yunhyeong said and they hung up.

Hanbin sighe deeply, he took his hand to his face yet again rubbing his temples, letting his hand slide down the rest of his face before he took a deep, determined breath.

He returned to the table, watching Mina cuddling with Jiwon, completely unbothered by their surroundings.

“Hanbin.” Jiwon called the moment he saw him, he even detached himself slightly from Mina, who didn’t seem to mind.

Hanbin couldn’t stop his eyes from wandering and saw their entwined hands.

Feeling his heart sink, he swallowed hard before he came to a halt at teh end of the table.

“Um, I’m gonna excuse myself. You two continue with your date.” Hanbin said in a strained voice as he grabbed his stuff.

Jiwon frowned yet again, watching as Hnabin hastily grabbed his things.

“Are you going to see that Yunhyeong guy?” He asked, he sounded annoyed.

“Yeah.” Hanbin replied casually.

Hanbin took out his wallet and started rummaging through it for the cash to pay for his meal.

“I'll cover for you, pay me back later.” Jiwon said in a low voice.

“Oh, thanks man. You'll get it back tomorrow.” Hanbin smiled at the other man while he put his wallet away.

Jiwon looked like he wanted to say something, but seemed to stop himself at the last moment.

“Bye.” Hanbin uttered hastily and rushed off without looking back.

Hanbin didn't stop until he reached the station, he slouched down on a bench near the exit to wait for Yunhyeong.


	2. Chapter 2

Yunhyeong appeared from the underground station, Hanbin saw him first and got to his feet.

“Hey, Hanbin.” Yunhyeong said as he threw an arm around Hanbin’s shoulder dragging him along.

“Thanks for coming, I appreciate it.” Hanbin said in a low voice.

“No worries, I was bored anyways.” Yunhyeong said nonchalantly.

“How you holding up?” Yunhyeong continued giving him a sideways glance.

“Oh, I’ve cooled down a bit. I mean, I know it’s silly to behave like that given that he doesn’t even know how I feel about him.” Hanbin grumbled while looking at the ground. 

“Oh, how mature of you.” Yunhyeong seemed genuinely impressed.

Hanbin sighed deeply.

They continued to walk as they chatted lightly about this and that.

“How about we go in here for some coffee?” Yunhyeong suggested as they walked past a cozy looking cafe.

“Sure.” Hanbin agreed and followed Yunhyeong inside.

They placed their order and sat down as they waited.

“So…” Yunhyeong began.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” He asked casually without even looking at Hanbin.

Hanbin fell silent for a minute while he thought about it.

“Not right now.” He confessed, he bit his lip with the frustrated feeling that welled up inside of him.

“OK. Some other time then. Just remember, I’m ready to listen if you wanna talk.” Yunhyeong said and looked at him with a reassuring look in his eyes.

‘Thanks.” Hanbin smiled a little, returning th mother’s soft gaze.

They drank their coffee, chatting casually.

Once they finished their coffee they went shopping,

Hanbin had a really good time, and by the time they said goodbye he had forgotten about the unpleasantries earlier that evening.

Only when he lay in bed that evening did the memory resurface, he sighed deeply, pushing his finger back with his fingers as he let them combe through his hair.

“BUt I have to see him tomorrow.” Hanbin sighed to himself.

*

The next day Hanbin arrived early for his first lesson of the day.

He sat i the hallway, looking at his phone to make time pass more quickly.

“Hanbin.” Jiwon called as he suddenly appeared in front of him.

Hanbil felt a jolt run through hi with a sense of panic.

“H-hey!” He managed to stutter.

Hanbin got to his feet and started rummaging through his backpack.

“Here.” He said as he pulled out the money.

He presented the money he owed to Jiwon, but the other man didn’t even look at the money, instead he simply stared at Hanbin.

“What?” Hanbin frowned at him in confusion.

“Don’t you think you were rather rude yesterday?” Jiwon said harshly.

Hanbin stared at Jiwon in slight disbelief as he pushed the money into the man's hands.

“Well, I suppose. I’m sorry alright, but honestly who wants to be a third wheel on somebody else’s date?” Hanbin retorted, getting a little annoyed as well.

“I wanted to introduce you to my girlfriend, you’re an important friend to me Hanbin.” Jiwon said, he seemed frustrated that Hanbin didn’t seem to understand this.

“Important enough that you didn’t even mention her once since you two started talking?” Hanbin scoffed, he was actually pretty annoyed about this fact.

“Hah?!” Jiwon sounded mad as he retorted.

“Look, we should stop. We’re causing a scene.” Hanbin said throwing his arm out to indicate their surroundings.

Jiwon fell silent, suddenly aware of the people watching them.

“We’ll talk more later.” Jiwon huffed and left in a hurry, leaving Hanbin behind.

Hanbin went to class feeling agitated, even when Yunhyeong came in late huffing and puffing it didn’t improve his mood much.

“Hey, should we go out drinking today, maybe it’ll improve your mood?” Yunhyeong suggested in a hushed voice.

“How about we hit up a place where we can be completely relaxed? You know, let loose and… be ourselves?” Yunhyeong winked at him discreetly.

Hanbin’s mind mulled over the meaning of Yunhyeong’s semi-cryptic message until it made sense. 

“You know what, that doesn’t sound so bad.” Hanbin said monotonously.

“Good boy” Yunhyeong chimed and patted him on the shoulder.

Once class was over Yunhyeong had a different class to attend so they arranged to meet later before parting ways.

Hanbin went to the library, but before he could get settled Jiwon called him.

[“Hey, where are you?”] Jiwon asked without waiting for Hanbin to even greet him.

“I’m at the library.” Hanbin replied coldly.

[“OK. I’m headed there now. Don’t leave.”] Jiwon proclaimed before he abruptly hung up.

Hanbin sighed, he grabbed his stuff and walked to stand outside the library entrance to wait.

Jiwon arrived, breathing heavily as if he'd speed walked all the way there.

“You OK?” Hanbin asked, frowning at the other.

“Yes. Let’s go sit somewhere.” Jiwon suggested looking around for an empty seat.

“Honestly I really need to do some research in the library.” Hanbin said calmly while watching Jiwon regain his breath.

“It won't take that long.” Jiwon grumbled.

“Fine.” Hanbin gave in with a huff and walked towards an empty seat on a bench nearby.

Jiwon followed him and sat down so that they were facing each other.

“What now?” Hanbin asked clearly annoyed.

Jiwon looked a little bummed as he looked at Hanbin.

“I don't like it when you're mad at me.” He admitted hanging his head.

Hanbin held his breath for a second before he answered.

“I’m not mad at you.” He said in a low voice not looking directly at Jiwon, but he saw how his shoulders seemed to relax out of the corner of his eye.

“You seemed mad this morning, and just now…” Jiwon said.

“Didn't we just make up, you wanna drag this on for longer?” Hanbin said a little exasperated laugh in his voice.

“NO. No, you’re right.” Jiwon sighed.

Jiwon suddenly grabbed Hanbin’s forearm and pulled him into a hug.

Hanbin felt his heart skip a beat, and for a moment he was tense before he relaxed into Jiwon’s embrace.

Hanbin wrapped his arms around Jiwon, and they remained like this for a short while until Jiwon separated himself from Hanbin.

Hanbin did feel a bit better, but a sense of guilt and frustration was gnawing at the pit of his stomach.

Hanbin forced a smile, he felt it stretch painfully on his face so he looked away quickly and cleared his throat.

They separated fully, and Hanbin reached for his backpack again to rummage for the money.

While he was searching for it Jiwon’s phone started ringing.

He quickly looked at the screen, grinned broadly as he answered the call.

“Hey!” He exclaimed happily.

Hanbin couldn’t hear who it was, simply that it was a woman, and he felt it was safe to assume that it was Mina who was calling.

“Yeah, it’s all good.” He replied to some question she’d asked.

“Un, I’ll see you later.” Jiwon said with a smile as he hung up, he continued to smile like an idiot even after he’d shoved the phone back into his pocket.

Hanbin stared at him.

“What?” Jiwon asked, his embarrassment showing on his face.

“Oh, nothing. I was just thinking you really like her.” The words were bitter sweet, and left him with a bad taste in his mouth.

Indeed that goofy grin on his face was a sweet gift, but the reason for it left Hanbin feeling jealous and bitter.

Jiwon blushed as he started to stutter in his embarrassment.

“Du-dude! Shu- shut up!” He managed to say as he smiled happily yet again.

It was too much for Hanbin, his heart lurched painfully in his chest and he felt the need to escape.

The emotions rocketed him to his feet, he didn’t look at Jiwon as he spoke.

“Well, see you. I gotta go study now.” He wasn’t actually lying, he just had to get away without raising suspicion.

“Oh, ok. Talk to you later then. I'll hit you up on katalk ok?” Jiwon beamed at him.

“Yeah, sure. Bye.” Hanbin managed to hopefully utter normally.

Hanbin scurried away and into the library, he didn't even look back once - and he could feel Jiwon’s eyes on his back.

Once he was out of sight he leaned against the wall, he slowly sank down to sit on the floor, pulling his knees in he buried his face so that it wasn’t visible to anyone.

He took several calming breaths, he could feel his eyes burning with tears as he felt frustration and a tidal wave of other emotions flooding him, threatening to violently escape him.

After sitting like this for a while, he heard people whispering around him and when he looked up he saw people looking at him.

He stood up abruptly and cleared his throat, checking his watch at the same time.

So much time had passed that he had to leave for his next class, he sighed deeply yet again as he threw the backpack on and left the library with people still watching him as he left


	3. Chapter 3

Hanbin looked up from his phone and saw Yunhyeong waving at him.

He hurried over, and when he came close he saw Yunhyeong beaming at him.

“What?” Hanbin asked feeling a little flustered by the other’s bright smile.

“Oh, nothing. I’m just in a good mood and now we’re gonna go drinking.” Yunhyeong said happily as he waved his arms in a big wild gesture.

Hanbin wasn’t really sure what it all meant but he decided to go with the flow and return Yunhyeong’s big grin.

Yunhyeong seemed pleased with his reaction so he jumped to his feet.

“Let’s gooo!” He exclaimed and pointed out the direction they were going before he started walking.

Hanbin snorted to himself and shook his head as he followed the other.

Yunhyeong lead him down a few streets, weaving in and out of busy shoppers and people who were barhopping.

Yunhyeong suddenly turned down aside street and stopped in front of a door under an old-fashioned neon-sign.

“We’re here!” Yunhyeong exclaimed and opened the door to go inside.

Hanbin followed, his eyes darting all over the place to get an overview of the place.

The inside interior was old/fashioned as well, like the sign outside, but it had a nice atmosphere.

“Hi, Yunhyeong.” The bartender called out the minute he saw them, his eyes travelled from Yunhyeong to Hanbin, looking him up and down.

“Oh, a new face.” He said smiling at Hanbin.

Hanbin bowed quickly, waiting for Yunhyeong to introduce him since he seemed to be friendly with the man.

“This is Hanbin.” Yunhyeong said shortly and arrived at the bar with a few swift steps.

“Nice to meet you.” The bartender said as Hanbi arrived at the bar.

They both placed an order for some drink and chatted happily.

Hanbin was starting to get really tipsy, bordering on drunk, which he rarely was, at least in public.

Hanbin suddenly found himself grabbing into Yunhyeong, his face glued to the man’s shoulder.

“Hanbin, were you always this clingy?” Yunhyeong asked abruptly as Hanbin hugged his arm, snuggling his shoulder.

“Uhn… but Jiwon doesn’t like people clinging to him so I don’t…” Hanbin said, he suddenly felt sleepy.

The door of the bar opened suddenly and a tall man entered, followed by a shorter man.

“Oh, Yunhyeong. It’s been a while.” The shorter man said, coming up to them.

“Who’s this?” He asked looking at Hanbin.

“Oh, he’s my classmate, Hanbin.” Yunhyeong explained.

“Hanbin, this is my friend Jinhwan.” Yunhyeong gestured towards the man.

Hanbin looked at him, he had an attractive face and a nice air about him.

The same could not be said for the tall man who’d come in with him, he had defined eyebrows and a peculiar aura which Hanbin found a bit off putting.

“Oh, this is Junhoe. He’s my partner.” Jinhwan said with a gentle smile.

The tall man seemed to relax at his words.

“Oh, you don’t say.” Exclaimed Yunhyeong and was very interested in him.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Junhoe.” He said a low voice.

“Oh, I like you’re voice.” Yunhyeong grinned at Junhoe, who seemed flustered and looked at Jinhwan who was completely unbothered.

Yunhyeong giggled in his obviously tipsy way, leaning on Hanbin.

Hanbin chortled as well and leaned on Yunhyeong in return.

“Let’s drink!” Yunhyeong exclaimed and turned to the bar and ordered a round for everyone.

Together with Jinhwan and Junhoe they moved to a booth and continued to drink until they were pretty drunk.

Hanbin could feel himself falling asleep, so he leaned onto the. Back of the sofa.

“Hanbin, Hanbin, don’t fall asleep.” Yunhyeong said shaking Hanbin’s shoulder.

Hanbin sat up straight forcing his heavy eyes open.

“You’re super drunk.” Junhoe commented, chortling while swaying slightly from side to side.

Jinhwan suddenly fell onto his shoulder and let out a deep sigh.

Junhoe looked to the side and down at the man leaning on him, a soft and warm smile spread across his face that seemed uncharacteristic of him.

Hanbin was watching their interaction and it suddenly dawned on him.

“Ah, partner… roman-” he began but, a glare from Junhoe shut him up.

Yunhyeong leaned close to Hanbin, fixing him with an intense look.

“Be careful with your words, even though this place is safe, letting it out so absentmindedly means you could say it at the wrong place…” Yunhyeong was honest with him, it might be because of the alcohol, but Hanbin didn’t mind.

“Sorry” he said at first not to anyone in particular, but something compelled him to make eye contact with Junhoe and tried to focus on him

“I’m sorry.” He said earnestly.

Junhoe’s firm gaze softened and he took a sip of his beer, occasionally peeking at Jinhwan who was snoozing lightly as he leaned on the larger man.

“Hey, maybe we should call it a night?” Yunhyeong suggested.

The rest agreed and they somehow managed to haul their asses out of the bar and onto the street, trying to make their way to the subway.

‘Maybe we should grab a taxi?” Yunhyeong grumbled as they stopped on a street corner.

“But we all live in different directions.” Hanbin said as he leaned against the wall.

“Nah, you live in the opposite direction, I live on the way to where they’re going.” Yunhyeong jabbed his thumb at Jinhwan and Junhoe.

“Oh…” Hanbin sighed.

Hanbin stood up suddenly, something compelled him up and forward.

“Where are you going?” Yunhyeong asked, moving closer to hanbin.

“Huh?” Hanbin turned and looked at Yunhyeong, but he didn’t have an answer for him.

Yunhyeong came up to Hanbin and grabbed him, pulling Hanbin's arm over his shoulder he yanked hi along.

“Ugh, I should probably take him home, he seems pretty wasted.” Yunhyeong said to the other two.

“Do you even know where he lives?” Junhoe asked.

“Not exactly…” Yunhyeong admitted.

“Then just take him to your place.” Jinhwan suggested.

“I suppose I could do that…” Yunhyeon wondered aloud, he hoisted Hanbin up yet again.

“Kim Hanbin?” A loud man erupted behind them, they all turned to look and saw someone making their way towards them.

“Ah, Jiwon…” Yunhyeong sighed and turned half-way around to face the other who came rushing at them.

Jiwon stopped dead in front of Hanbin who was completely out of it.

“Hanbin?!” Jiwon asked loudly, he sounded concerned.

“Don’t worry, he’s just drunk.” Yunhyeong explained.

“Drunk? He never drinks this much.” Jiwon seemed utterly confused, making it obvious that he'd neve seen Hanbin in this state.

“Don't worry, we're calling it quits.” Yunhyeong said, he stumbled as Hanbin suddenly moved.

“I’ll take him!” Jiwon said abruptly.

“Jiwon, what’s going on?” A girl asked showing up behind him.

Yunhyeong looked at her, he thought that this had to be the girlfriend that Hanbin had talked about.

“Isn’t that your friend? He doesn’t look so good.” She said looking at Hanbin.

“Yunhyeong, I said I’ll take him!” Jiwon said more forcefully. 

“No, it’s alright, I’ll just take him back to my place, it’s closer anyways.” Yunhyeong said and pulled Hanbin closer.

Jiwon frowned abruptly, he actually seemed angry.

“No, I can take him to his own home.” Jiwon insisted.

“But he’s pretty drunk, I don’t think he should be alone.” Yunhyeong explained.

“Then I’ll stay with him.” Jiwon blurted out.

Yunhyeong frowned at him, using his free hand Yunhyeong gestured towards the girl.

“What about this young lady?” He asked without blinking.

Jiwon looked back at his girlfriend who still didn’t seem to grasp the situation. 

Jiwon hesitated, he looked from his girlfriend to Hanbin and seemed to be struggling to make a decision.

Yunhyeong thought to himself that he didn’t want to let Hanbin go home with Jiwon, he feared that Hanbin might do something he’d really regret.

“Hey, don’t worry about it.” Yunhyeong said hurriedly, he felt Hanbin slipping so he grabbed at him.

Hanbin groaned as Yunhyeong pinched his side so he reached out and latched onto Yunhyeong, burying his face in the man’s shoulder.

Yunhyeong who’d been watching Hanbin’s actions looked up to see Jiwon’s dark expression, it was difficult to distinguish what emotion he was feeling. 

It actually sent a jolt of fear through Yunhyeong who wanted to take a step, but the weight of Hanbin hanging onto him stopped him.

“Jiwon?” the girl touched Jiwon’s shoulder, she also seemed unsure.

The touch seemed to snap him out of it, and he took a deep breath to calm down. 

He looked at his girlfriend again, his brow furrowed as he seemed to come to a decision he didn’t actually like.

“Fine…” he grumbled, seeming very displeased with the turn out.

He stared at Yunhyeong for a split second as if considering something.

All of a sudden he charged forward, leaning in close to Yunhyeong’s ear.

“If you do anything… inappropriate… to him, I swear I’ll…” he said in a dark and menacing tone.

“Look, I might be gay, but I don’t roll like that.” Yunhyeong growled back, the assumption that he would do something like that made his insides burn with blind fury.

Jiwon seemed a bit taken aback by how mad Yunhyeong got, but before he could retort his girlfriend had intervened by grabbing his arm and pulling him away.

‘Don’t fight.” She hissed at him.

“Looks like your girlfriend has some good sense, you should definitely listen to her.” Yunhyeong said darkly smiling stiffly at him, a sense of smugness coming over him.

Jiwon gritted his teeth, fixing Yunhyeong with a piercing glare as he allowed his girlfriend to tug him away.

“Come on, Jiwon. Your friend is taken care of, let’s go.” She insisted a little desperately,

“Good bye.” She said and bowed as she managed to drag Jiwon away. 

“Hanbin, I’ll call you later.” Jiwon yelled suddenly, but his girlfriend tugged him hard and sped up to get away quickly.

“Jesus. He sure acts like you belong to him or something.” Jinhwan commented.

“I know, right?” Yunhyeong agreed loudly, turning so fast that he almost dropped Hanbin.

“Honestly, sometimes I wonder if your feelings aren’t actually mutual.” Yunhyeong said under his breath as he hoisted Hanbin up again.

“Let’s go.” Yunhyeong grunted as he got Hanbin back on his feet.

“I’ll hail a cab.” Jinhwan chirped as he marched off to the curb and stood there with his arm raised.

“Hey, could you help me with him?” Yunhyeong looked at Junhoe who got to his feet without saying anything and took Hanbin’s arm and flung it over his shoulder, supporting him from the opposite side.

When the taxi pulled up Jinhwan opened the door and they managed to get Hanbin into the car then themselves.

They were silent during the drive, the taxi pulled over and Junhoe helped him get Hanbin out of the car.

“Are you sure you won’t need any help?” Junhoe asked looking concerned.

“Thanks, but I'll manage.” Yunhyeong smiled at him, hoisting Hanbin up for the fourth time since getting out of the taxi.

Junhoe slowly made his way back into the taxi, watching Yunhyeong the whole time as if waiting for him to change his mind.

“Relax. He said he'd manage. Don't complain about it later.” Jinhwan said as he waved at the two outside the car.

Yunhyeong awkwardly waved back, before he turned at started hauling Hanbin’s unconscious ass up the stairs to his apartment.

Once Yunhyeong had dumped Hanbin onto his bed, he felt his knees give out and he sat down on the floor curious about how he'd hoisted this man, who was just a little taller and heavier than himself up all those stairs, but he was too tired to think about it any more.

He looked at Hanbin’s sleeping face, there was no denying how adorable this man was.

Yunhyeong reached up and pushed Hanbin’s fringe back, looking at his sleeping face.

Hanbin stirred, so Yunhyeong pulled back in surprise, but Hanbin didn't wake up.

The silence was interrupted by the sound of a phone vibrating.

Yunhyeong looked around and reliazed it was in Hanbin’s pocket when he suddenly started fidgeting. 

He looked at Hanbin then slowly moved towards the pocket and removed the phone.

He looked at the screen, the caller id filled the screen and Yunhyong frowned at Jiwon’s name.

It stopped ringing, then immedatly started again.

Yunhyeong watched as the calls kept piling up, the text started coming in and katalk messages.

“Seriously, this guy acts like a possesive boyfriend…” He sighed and put the phone down.

Yunhyeong was still sure that he’d made the right decision about taking Hanbin back to his place. 

He could still see the phone going off, he was tired, too tired to worry much about how to deal with the whole Jiwon thing.

Hanbin would see the calls and texts tomorrow, and probably wonder what happened. 

Yunhyeong tried to get his thoughts back on track, but since he was stil drunk his mind couldn’t focus on creating any good answers.

“Geez, let’s just sleep.” Yunhyeong suggested to himself, he got up and took off his sweater, stripping down to his t-shirt while leaving his pants on.

He stepped over Hanbin to lay down behind him, he turned to face the wall so that he was facing away from Hanbin. 

He jolted when Hanbin suddenly moved, brushing against him.

Yunhyeong felt oddly tense as he tried to get comfortable, but every time Hanbin moved it disturbed him.

After scooting even closer to the wall Yunhyeong closed his eyes.

After a short while Yunhyeong was also fast asleep, unbothered by Hanbin’s squirming.


	4. Chapter 4

Hanbin stirred, he tried to open his eyes, but it was almost impossible.

As he moved his body helt felt some resistance so he started moving his hands, he froze when he felt skin under his palm.

Hanbin forced his eyes open and found himself staring straight into the back of someone’s head.

Petrified he simply stared at the mass of hair in front of him, but after studying the cut and colour he realized that it had to be Yunhyeong.

Feeling relieved he relaxed and turned over onto his back.

He stared at the ceiling, he tried to remember how they got back to what he assumed was Yunhyeong’s apartment. 

Hanbin fumbled for his pockets to find his phone, when he couldn’t find it he looked around, turning over to his side and looked down at the floor next to the bed where he saw his phone.

He picked it up to check the time only to discover that it was completely drained.

He sighed, he could feel his head throbbing and he suspected it would only get worse in a short while.

He looked over at Yunhyeong who was still fast asleep, he reached out and wrapped his hand around his shoulder and started shaking him slightly.

“Yunhyeong.” He said, his voice raspy and rough.

The other man simply stirred, but didn’t wake, so Hanbin shook him more violently.

“Yunhyeong.” He said a bit louder while continuously shaking him.

Yunhyeong woke with a start, groaning as he started to sit up straight.

“Mornin’” he groaned in a husky voice. 

“Morning.” Hanbin said back.

There was silence for a moment where Yunhyeong tried to rub the sleep out of his eyes.

“Hey, you got any painkillers?” Hanbin asked.

“Hm… I think there should be some in the bathroom. Give me a sec.” Yunhyeong grumbled and got to his feet, stumbling a little as he walked he made his way towards a door in the hallway.

He reemerged holding a pill tray.

“Water…” He mumbled suddenly and made a quick turn for the kitchen.

He opened the fridge and pulled out two water bottles which he brought to the bed.

‘Here.” He said shortly as he handed one of the bottles to Hanbin and then pushed two pills from the tray into Hanbin’s open hand.

They both took the pills.

“We should get some breakfast.” Hanbin suggested.

“It’s so early though.” Yunhyeong looked at the clock on the wall.

Hanbin sighed deeply, he fell back onto the bed and sprawled out.

“Your bed is huge…” He said trying to stop the situation from getting awkward.

“I know, it’s so nice…” Yunhyeong drawled happily.

They fell silent for a moment.

Even if Hanbin considered Yunhyeong a friend, they weren’t that close so this intimate situation was a bit uncomfortable.

Honestly Hanbin hadn’t actually stayed over at someone’s place since junior high, unless you counted Jiwon that was, that was a regular occurance.

‘Sorry, but could I freshen up?” Hanbin asked sitting up on the bed.

“Oh, sure. You wanna borrow some clothes?” Yunhyeong said and hastily moved towards his closet before Hanbin had even replied.

Seeing the man’s actions Hanbin felt that he couldn't refuse.

‘Ah, thank you. I’ll wash them before I return them.” Hanbin mumbled feeling a little bothered.

‘Hey, don’t worry about it. I have too many clothes anyway.” Yunhyeong brushed aside Hanbin's concerns. 

Yunhyeong lead Hanbin to the bathroom, handing him the clothes as Hanbin stepped inside.

“Towels under the sink.” Yunhyeong told him before he closed the door behind Hanbin.

After the shower Hanbin felt much better.

He put the clothes on and looked at himself in the mirror, the clothes were so not his style at all.

They didn't look bad, but they weren’t something that he himself would choose to wear.

When he came out of the bathroom, he saw Yunhyeong looking at him.

After a split second he started to laugh.

“Sorry, it somehow doesn’t suit you… you don’t look bad at all, it’s just so different from your normal style.” Yunhyeong explained while continuing to chortle.

“I was just thinking the same thing.” Hanbin replied and started laughing as well.

“Mah, I think we can go get something to eat now.” Yunhyeong said and got to his feet.

“Sounds good.” Hanbin said and grabbed his phone, he sighed when he remembered that it was dead, so he put it back into his pocket.

“Wanna charge it a bit before we leave?” Yunhyeong paused halfway through putting his shoes on.

“No. No. I should get going after we've had breakfast anyways.” Hanbin grinned, patting the phone now in his pocket.

“Ok. If you say so…” Yunhyeong shrugged as he finished putting his shoes on.

They found a cozy cafe near the station where they ate and chatted.

“Ah, man. I don’t even remember what happened last night.” Hanbin said suddenly, realizing he hadn’t given last night much thought.

Yunhyeong was caught by surprise and fell silent for a second as his mind raced to think of what to say.

“Well, you were pretty drunk.” Yunhyeong began.

“Duh…” Hanbin sighed.

“You didn’t do anything embarrassing, I can tell you that.” Yunhyeong said while he continued to eat.

“Well, that’s good at least.” Hanbin sighed again.

Yunhyeong felt his shoulders relax, he was certain he’d dodged a bullet: Hanbin was too good for a blind asshole like Jiwon anyways, honestly he’d be better off in a relationship with him.

Yunhyeong froze for a second as what he had just thought became clear to him.

He looked at Hanbin: he had always thought that Hanbin was a total cutie, but he’d never really considered dating him.

“What?” Hanbin asked, meeting his gaze.

“Hm?” Yunhyeong was a little dazed so he could only make this sound as his reply.

“You’re staring at me.” Hanbin said and chuckled.

“Oh, nothing I was just lost in thought.” Yunhyeong said feeling embarrassed.

Hanin snorted through his nose.

“Thank you for taking care of me last night.” Hanbin said while sighing.

Yunhyeong was taken aback when Hanbin looked at him, his warm soft gaze made his heart skip a beat.

Feeling flustered Yunhyeong cleared his throat and fumbled with his fork which he promptly dropped, it fell onto the table, hitting the plate making a loud clang.

Hanbin started laughing while Yunhyeong felt embarrassed and could feel that his face was hot.

“Sorry.” Yunhyeong said loudly, bowing his head awkwardly in a variety of directions where he knew people were sitting.

Hanbin continued to laugh, he tried to muffle it, but it was funny to see the usually carefree Yunhyeong feeling awkward and bothered. 

“Are you done?” Yunhyeong asked darkly.

Honestly it made Hanbin want to laugh even more, but he did his best and somehow managed to stop laughing while taking deep breaths.

“Yes, yes.” Hanbin replied, but he couldn’t restrain his laughter completely and snorted a little which made Yunhyeong frown.

“We should leave.” Hanbin said in between restrained laughs.

“Let’s go then.” Yunhyeong said briskly, gathering the things on the plate in front of him.

They got to their feet and left te cafe, wandering slowly through the bustling street of weekend shoppers.

“You gonna head home?” Yunhyeong asked as they came up on the entrance to the subway.

“Ah, yeah. I probably should, I have some work to do so.” Hanbin said calmly coming to a halt near the entrance.

“Well, just text me if anything happens, and I’ll see you Monday.” Yunhyeong said while patting Hanbin’s shoulder.

“Ah, sure. I’ll wash your clothes and give them to you on Monday. Bye.” Hanbin turned to look at Yunhyeong.

“Yeah, bye.” Yunhyeong said also turning towards Hanbin as well.

Hanbin smiled softly at him as he started walking away.

Yunhyeong stood there and watched until Hanbin disappeared from sight before he started on the way home, his mind filled with a series of new thoughts.


	5. Chapter 5

As soon as Hanbin came home he went straight to his bed and threw himself down on top of the covers, he stared at the ceiling for a while before he pulled out his phone out of habit.

“Ah, shit.” He cursed softly as the phone didn’t respond.

He rolled over and put the charger that was laying on the floor into the socket and then into his phone.

The phone lit up, but wouldn't turn on so he placed it on the floor, he then rolled onto his back to wait.

He got up and went to the bathroom, taking off the clothes he’d borrowed from Yunhyeong and throwing them directly into the washing machine. 

He walked out naked and found some comfy clothes to wear. 

He sat on the edge of the bed and took his phone and turned it on. 

While he waited for the phone to start up completely on he gazed out the window, but his head snapped back when he felt his phone vibrate violently and non-stop. 

When he looked at the screen one name was on multiple calls, texts and a katalk chat.

Jiwon’s name was plastered across the whole screen, Hanbin frowned and punched in the code, while checking the texts and katalk first his frown grew deeper.

After reading several of the messages he pulled up his call log and hit Yunhyeong’s number before bringing the phone to his ear.

The phone rang for a moment before the man picked up.

“He-” Yunhyeong began but Hanbin cut him off.

“Did we meet Jiwon last night?” Hanbin asked coldly.

There was a long pause.

“When I turned on my phone just now it was full of missed calls and texts, he seemed panicked, worried, angry even.” Hanbin summarized stiffly. 

“Were you going to keep this from me, or did you just forget?” Hanbin asked outright.

Yunhyeong sighed.

“Hanbin, I want you to listen to me. I only did what I thought was best, and I couldn't find the right time to say anything.” Yunhyeong confesse.

“We bumped into Jiwon and his girlfriend when we were heading home last night, He insisted on taking you home to your own place, but I… it didn’t feel right. What if you’d said something you’d end up regretting?” Yunhyeong paused for a moment as if waiting for Hanbin’s reaction.

It was Hanbin’s turn to sigh, he rubbed his face with the palm of his hand.

“Look, I am sorry, It’s really fucked up, but I didn’t actually mean to hide it from you, I just didn't know how to bring it up, I never found the right timing to say anything either.” Yunhyeong continued.

“I swear it won’t happen again.” Yunhyeong reassured him.

There was a pause, Hanbin didn't say anything.

“Have you… have you contacted him?” Yunhyeong asked carefully.

“Not yet. But I’d better do it now before he comes pounding down my door.” Hanbin said in a low voice. 

“Ah, OK. Well I guess we’ll talk later or at school or something…” Yunhyeong said softly.

“Yeah, bye.” Hanbin said shortly.

“Bye.” Yunhyeong said before Hanbin hung up.

Hanbin let his phone fall while sighing deeply.

“What the heck…” he mumbled aloud to himself.

He found Jiwon’s number and hit it it so that the phone started calling.

It rung for a few times before he picked up.

“Hanbin!” Jiwon yelled into the phone, startling Hanbin.

“Jesus, relax would yah? There's no need to shout.”

“I was about to call the police! Why didn’t you answer a single one of my calls? Or my texts?” Jiwon spoke in a rather frantic voice.

“I’m sorry, my phone had die-” Hanbin started to explain but was cut off by Jiwon yelling at him again.

“Then you charge it!” Jiwon seemed angry.

“Relax, you know that Yunhyeong took care of me so there’s no need to be worried.” Hanbin sighed deeply, using his hand to brush his hair back, leaving his hand in his hair.

“Hanbin…” Jiwon began solemnly.

“That guy he… didn’t do anything to you did he?” Jiwon asked in a low voice.

“What? Are you crazy?” Hanbin felt a bit annoyed. 

Sure Yunhyeong was gay, but that didn’t make him a rapist.

“But he’s…!” Jiwon raised his voice.

“Just because he's gay doesn't mean he’s gonna lay his hands on every man he sees!” Hanbin argued, also raising his voice.

Jiwon fell silent for a moment.

“Are you OK?” Jiwon asked in a softer tone.

The sudden change to a more tender tone made Hanbin’s heart skip a beat. 

“Y-yeah.” Hanbin replied, he was glad Jiwon couldn’t see him.

“I’m perfectly fine, just a little hungover and a slight headache, but I already took the painkillers.” Hanbin told Jiwon, hoping to maintain the soft tone . 

“OK. Hey, do you wanna meet later?” Jiwon asked suddenly.

Hanbin felt his heart pick up pace at the thought of being with Jiwon after such a long time.

“Mina knows this really cool new place at the next station over that…” Jiwon continued but Hanbin cut him off.

“Ah, actually I’d just like to rest today. I need to work on my report later as well. You go, and I’ll just see you at school.” Hanbin said, trying to keep his voice from shaking, but he could feel his face stiffen as well as a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach.

“Ah, OK. You rest well then. Call me if you need anything. I’ll see you Monday then…” Jiwon said in a low voice.

“Yeah. Bye.” Hanbin grumbled.

“Bye.” Jiwon said before he hung up.

Hanbin’s chest ached, he sat there motionless, still holding the phone to his ear.

Hanbin let the phone fall slowly, he ended up dropping it before he fell back onto the bed, retracting his legs to curl up and into the fetus position.

He sighed, he could feel the tears welling up. 

After laying there for a long time he spread out, staring at the ceiling while his mind raced.

“Maybe… it's time to… give up?” He muttered to himself in a hoarse voice.

His mind continued to race as he lay there.

After a while he fell asleep.


	6. Chapter 6

It had been three weeks since the night Hanbin had gone out drinking with Yunhyeong, he hadn’t spoken properly with neither Yunhyeong or Jiwon since that day.

In fact he was avoiding Jiwon completely.

After he had made up his mind about giving up on his unrequited love, it seemed to hurt even more than before.

Both he and Yunhyeong had been busy in separate work groups for an upcoming presentation.

But the moment the presentation was done and he was back in his seat, Hanbin’s phone chimed as a text came in.

He looked at the screen and saw the text message and that it was from Yunhyeong.

[“Cafeteria.”] was all the text said, making Hanbin frown.

He turned around and caught Yunhyeong staring at him as he waited for some type of reply.

Hanbin gave a curt nod then turned back to face the teacher who was summing up her thoughts as the class neared its end.

When she dismissed them Hanbin got to his feet and started for the cafeteria, he peaked at Yunhyeong who was being hogged by the people who’d been in his presentation group.

Hanbin sat down at a table to wait for Yunhyeong, and after a few minutes the man appeared.

“Sorry, they wanted to go out and celebrate, and I couldn't break away.” He muttered as he sat down next to Hanbun.

“No worries.” 

“But on that topic, do you wanna go out and have a drink with me?” Yunhyeong turned expectantly in his chair.

Hanbin was silent while he thought about it, quite frankly he rather felt like drinking to get his mind off things.

“Sure.” He said shortly as he got to his feet wallet in hand.

“Great, mind if I invite Jinhwan and Junhoe?” 

“Go ahead.” Hanbin scoffed as he walked off, he really didn't care about who was going to be there as long as it wasn't Jiwon.

Later that evening Hanbin arrived at the same bar as last time, when he walked in he found Yunhyeong, Jinhwan and Junhoe sitting in the same spot as last time, they were already drinking and seemed quite cheerful.

“Hey.” Jinhwan said giving him that one handed greeting.

Junhoe nodded once while Yunhyeong bounced to his feet and scooted so that Hanbin could sit.

“Hey.” Hanbin grumbled, he realized that he sounded tired and immediately forced a smile to try and bring his energy level up.

“Let's drink!” Yunhyeong exclaimed and grabbed the soju and started pouring it into a glass which he placed in front of Hanbin.

Hanbin took the glass and gulped it all down in one go.

They all drank and chatted, but after a while Hanbin felt someone staring at him.

He looked up too see Jinhwan staring at him.

“What?” Hanbin asked pulling back slightly.

“Are you OK since last time?” Jinhwan asked staring intently at Hanbin.

“Uh…” Hanbin couldn't find any words suddenly, he looked from Jinhwan's piercing gaze to Yunhyeong who seemed just as surprised as Hanbin at the other man’s question.

“Jinhwan.” Junhoe said darkly from the side. 

“What? I'm curious.” 

Jinhwan leaned closer, his eyes narrowing as he looked at Hanbin.

Hanbin tried to make sense of the situation, his mind was too muddled by alcohol to come up with a sensible answer. 

“That guy we met as we left…” Jinhwan began but he was cut off by Hanbin.

“He's my friend.” But he said it too quickly, and Jinhwan had keen senses and a wicked grin spread across his face.

“A friend… I see…” Jinhwan seemed to be waiting for Hanbin's reply.

“They really are just friends.” Yunhyeong interweened.

“We've been…” Hanbin started on his explanation, but this time Jinhwan cut him off.

“Friends for years? Trust me, sweetie, we’ve all been there… it's better to just give up.” Jinhwan scoffed, throwing his arms out dramatically.

Hanbin stared at Jinhwan, then he looked to Junhoe who nodded ever so slightly.

Lastly he looked at Yunhyeong who gave him a sort of apologetic look.

Hanbin lowered his head, taking a deep breath he sighed deeply.

“I am.” He said shortly, without raising his head.

“What?” Yunhyeong asked from beside him.

“I've already decided to give up.” 

Silence fell, but it lasted for only a few seconds before there was a small eruption.

“Good for you!” Jinhwan exclaimed.

“This round's on me!”

He grabbed Junhoe to go to the bar with him, once they were out of earshot Yunhyeong leaned in towards Hanbin.

“Are you really giving up on him?”

Yunhyeong seemed to be holding his breath as he waited for Hanbin's reply.

“Yeah, I'm sick of having these feelings. Sick of watching him be happy in relationships with women. I want to be happy to, and I realized that I can't do that if I'm still hung up on him.” 

Hanbin looked up at Yunhyeong, but was slightly surprised by the look on his face, he seemed glad and somehow excited.

Sensing Hanbin's confusion Yunhyeong pulled himself together.

“Sorry, I'm just glad for you.”

“Yeah, thanks.” 

“Here!” Jinhwan dumped the tall glass of beer right in front of Hanbin.

Junhoe set down the soju down, giving Hanbin a sideways glance.

“I'm fine.” Hanbin mumbled, even if Junhoe was a man of few words his intentions were easy to understand once you settled for his way of communication.

Junhoe sat down next to Jinhwan who started pouring up the soju and proposing a toast to the beginning of Hanbin's reboot at love.

As the evening progressed they four men were pretty wasted, but Hanbin made sure he wasn't as drunk as last time, but he still couldn't stop himself from clinging onto the others.

When he clung onto Jinhwan he found himself forcibly removed by a sour faced Junhoe, but when he then latched onto the large man Jinhwan started laughing.

“Let's go to the karaoke!” Jinhwan exclaimed happily, dancing along the sidewalk.

“Be careful.” Junhoe said and grabbed Jinhwan, pulling him close and continuing to hold onto him as they continued to walk.

Hanbin and Yunhyeong started teasing them, howling aloud while staggering along behind them.

“Shut up.” Junhoe barked in a low voice.

Hanbin threw his arm around Yunhyeong's shoulder, laughing aloud he felt more relaxed than he had for a long time.

They arrived at the karaoke place and started for the door, but before Junhoe could open the door it opened and a small group of people excited, forcing the four of them to step aside.

Hanbin turned to talk to Yunhyeong, but he was interrupted as a familiar voice called his name.

Jiwon stopped dead in front of him, removing his arm from his girlfriend as he came to stand right in front of Hanbin who was still attached to Yunhyeong.

“Hey, you out drinking again…” he paused, looking at Hanbin's arm around Yunhyeong.

“That's not like you…”

Jiwon seemed oddly uncomfortable as he shifted his weight around and placed his hands on his hip, leaning in close to Hanbin; making Hanbin hold his breath and his heart skip, and chest tighten painfully.

“If you keep climbing to guys like that, people will think you're gay.” He whispered close to Hanbin's ear.

Hanbin’s sluggish body couldn't flinch like it wanted to, so he just blinked slowly and leaned away slightly as if to look at him.

“So what?” Yunhyeong barked.

“Yunhyeong don't.” Hanbin turned towards him, placing his hand on the man's chest.

“Jiwon what are you doing?” Jiwon's girlfriend appeared, standing next to him she interlocked her arm with his, their united front made Hanbin's stomach churn painfully and his chest tightened with anger, followed by jealousy.

Jinhwan, who hadn't heard anything of what had been said, detached himself from Junhoe and came over, throwing his arms around Hanbin.

“Hey, let's go.” He said in a whiny voice.

Jiwon glared at Jinhwan, but he didn't care whatsoever.

Junhoe suddenly appeared, moving in between Jiwon and Jinhwan and puffing himself up defensively.

Jiwon was taken aback by the subtle aggression in Junhoe, and it forced him to take a step back, while pushing Mina back as well.

Jinhwan started chuckling, detaching himself from Hanbin and latching back onto Junhoe. 

“You- you've got to be kidding me?! Even more homos?! Han-” Jiwon stuttered, but it was Hanbin who reacted this time.

Before he realized what he was doing, Hanbin had by stepped Junhoe and Jinhwan and pushed Jiwon back with enough force to make the man stumble.

Jiwon looked confused and concerned, staring at Hanbin.

“Shut up!” Hanbin yelled.

Jiwon looked shocked, neither of them could probably remember the last time Hanbin had raised his voice like that.

“Ok, let's break it up before someone calls the police on us.” One of Jiwon's friends stepped in between Hanbin and Jiwon.

Jiwon didn't seem to register what was going on, he was simply staring at Hanbin.

Yunhyeong stepped forward and grabbed Hanbin's shoulders, steering him away and inside the karaoke place.

Jinhwan and Junhoe followed behind, leaving Jiwon and his gang of friends outside.

Hanbin remained completely silent until they'd closed the door to the room.

With shaking hands he slumped down onto the couch, letting his face rest in the palm of his hands.

Jinhwan sat down next to him, sighed deeply before he placed a reassuring hand on the man’s shoulder.

“It's gonna hurt, for how long? Nobody knows.” Jinhwan patted his shoulder a few times.

“But somehow, sooner or later it'll get easier, and at some point it'll all be some distant memory, and you’ll have moved on.”

He sighed yet again, then got to his feet.

“That sounded super dramatic.” Yunhyeong said in an attempt to break the tension. 

“Thank you, guys. You can start singing, I just need a minute.” Hanbin said with his face still in his hands.

“Sure.” Yunhyeong said softly and went to start picking songs.

Hanbin felt a huge presence in front of him, and assumed Junhoe was standing there.

He felt a large hand on his shoulder which was retracted just moments later.

Hanbin felt a sense of relief that he'd found these supporting and understanding friends, without them perhaps he would still be suffering in silence from his unrequited love.

He slapped his face with both hands before he sat up straight, he took a deep breath and focused on what was going on right in front of him.

He had definitely sobered up now, so he went and ordered some drinks and snacks.

When he returned Yunhyeong had gotten ahold pf the mic and was belting out the words like his life depended on it, while Jinhwan enthusiastically shaking the tambourin while Junhoe just sat there watching the other two.

He chuckled placing the tray of snacks and drinks on the table before sitting down opposite of Junhoe, the two made eye contact and Hanbin gestured towards the table telling him just help himself, earning him a curt nod as Junhoe reached out for a beer.

They didn’t leave until the karaoke bar closed and this time Hanbin was the one who had to help a drunk Yunhyeong home, he somehow managed to drag him up the stairs to his apartment.

“Yunhyeong, you need to enter your passcode.” Hanbin said to him as he yanked Yunhyeong up yet again.

Yunhyeong grumbled and moved his hand to the keypad and entered the code wrong twice before getting it right,

Hanbin hauled Yunhyeong inside and threw him onto the bed, he reached out and yanked Yunhyeong’s shoes off and threw them on the floor.

“Geez.:” He sighed and walked into the bathroom to wash his face.

When he returned Yunhyeong had curled into a ball on top of the blankets. 

Hanbin contemplated sleeping on the couch, but thinking about how he had shared the bed with Yunhyeong last time.

He pulled on the covers and managed to pull them out from under Yunhyeong to cover him before he got under the covers himself.

Even with Yunhyeong snoring next to him it didn’t take long before Hanbin drifted off to sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

The day after he’d stood up to Jiwon he woke up to find his phone, again, filled with messages from the man.

He looked through the texts, frowning at the contents and sighing deeply with frustration. 

He put the phone aside as he decided to ignore it, he looked over at Yunhyeong who was still sleeping soundly, he could see a streak of drool coming from the corner of his mouth, the sight was pretty funny so Hanbin chuckled as he got out of the bed.

Hanbin made his way to the bathroom, when he came back out Yunhyeong was awake, sitting in bed with his phone out he looked up at Hanbin.

“Thanks for bringing me home last night.” He beamed at the other who returned the smile.

“No worries, I owe you for last time.” 

“Oh, what’s a wet night between friends.” 

They both laughed a little.

Then there was silence where neither of them did anything.

‘Are you OK?” Yunhyeong asked, looking at Hanbin with a worried look in his eyes.

Hanbin wasn't sure about what to reply, he was silent as he thought about what to reply, but decided that honesty was the best way to go.

He sat down on the bed next to the other and sighed deeply.

“It hurts, but I’ll be OK.”

Yunhyeong had a somber look on his face, he reached out and patted hanbin on the shoulder.

Hanbin gave him a sad smile in return.

“Hey, lets put these thoughts aside and go find some grub!” Yunhyeong exclaimed and got to his feet.

“Maybe you should wash up first?” Hanbin chuckled.

Yunhyeong laughed, rubbing the back of his head with his hand out of embarrassment.

While Yunhyeong disappeared into the bathroom Hanbin looked at his phone again.

There were a couple of new messages from Jiwon, but also one from his mom.

He opened the message to read it, just as he finished reading it Yunhyeong reemerged.

“Done already?” Hanbin asked without looking at him.

“No, just forgot to bring a change of clothes. Don’t tell me that it’s that guy bothering you?” Yunhyeong frowned at the phone in Hanbin’s hands.

“Ah, no. My mom texted me, asking me to come home today if I can.” 

“Oh.” Yunhyeong seemed to relax a little.

“I’ll be done in a minute.” Yunhyeong said abruptly before returning to the bathroom.

Hanbin texted his mom a few more times, he sent off the last text just as Yunhyeong reemerged from the bathroom.

“You ready?” He beamed.

“Yeah, lets go!” Hanbin got to his feet and grabbed all his things.

The two of them left Yunhyeong’s apartment chatting happily as they strolled along to find a place to eat.

After they had finished eating they parted and Hanbin made s way to his mom’s place.

He didn't bother ringing the doorbell and just entered the pin code and entered, calling out as he came in.

“Hi sweetie!” His mom called from the living room.

Hanbin entered the living room, he looked around a few times before lookimg at his mother who was watching TV.

“Where's Hanbyul?”

“She's out with friends, she’ll be back at seven.”

“Oh, OK.” 

Hanbin sat down on the couch and pulled out his phone, there were a few new texts from Jiwon and one from Yunhyeong.

“After dinner I need you to help me with some things.” His mother said glancing over at him.

“Who are you talking to?”

“Oh, just some friends from college.” Hanbin grumbled while reading Yunhyeong's text.

“How's Jiwon doing? Is he diligently going to class?” She asked without looking at him.

Hanbin paused for a second, of course hi mother would ask about his closest childhood friend, who was also attending the same university as him.

“He's doing fine, but we don't have many lectures together anymore so…”

“Is that so…” she mumbled as she disappeared into the show she was watching.

Hanbin was kinda glad he didn't have to talk about Jiwon anymore so he replied to Yunhyeong, who had simply asked him if he made it there OK.

He didn't even bother opening the texts from Jiwon as he joined his mother in watching TV.

Once the show was over she got up and asked him to help her with dinner, just as they were almost done his father came home.

A short while later Hanbyul came in as well, she jumped at Hanbin who almost didn't grab here, telling her that she was too big to jump onto him now, to which she simply laughed and hugged him hard.

When they were done with dinner they returned the living room, his dad started asking him about university life and Hanbyul was on her phone.

“Hanbin.” His mother said suddenly as she got yo her feet.

He looked at her, waiting for her to continue her sentence.

She gestured for him to follow her, and she lead him to the kitchen.

She opened the pantry door and took out a semi-large box in a bag.

“This box is for Mrs. Kim, OK. I need you to deliver it for me.” She said while handing him the bag.

Hanbin's stomach dropped, he looked at the box and back at his mother, he teally didn’t want to go to Jiwon's house.

“What?” His mother looked confused as she waited for his reply.

Hanbin quickly pulled himself together.

“Yeah, yeah, sure!”

She smiled at him.

“Great, thank you. Oh, and you should probably go now before it's too late.”

“You kicking me out, mum?” Hanbin pulled a pouty face as he said it.

“Don't be silly!” She pushed him as she said it.

Hanbin chuckled, he followed his mother back into the living room.

“Oh, you’re leaving already?” His father looked at him, he was watching the news just as they arrived.

“Yeah, gonna go deliver this. Then I’ll go home.” Hanbin hoisted the bag up to show him.

“Give our regards to Mrs. and Mr. Kim.” His father said glancing back at the TV.

“WIll do. Bye.” He gave his mother a hug, and he nudged his sister as he walked by. 

“Bye.” She said without looking up from her phone.

He waved once more before he turned into the hallway and was out of sight.

As he took a step out into the cool evening air he sighed deeply.

He looked down at the bag in his hand feeling burdened, but he set off regardless, hopefully Jiwon wouldn’t be home.

He walked to the bus stop, luckily the bus he was getting arrived only moments later.

After sitting on the bus for about 15 minutes he got off, he walked to teh apartment complex and was struck by nostalgia.

“Looks like nothing’s changed.” He mumbled under his breath as he walked past the familiar playground.

He walked up the the entrance of teh apartment complex and pressed teh dial button for the intercom.

He waited while it rang.

“Hello, who is it? Oh, Hanbin! Come up! Come up!” Mrs. Kim said cheerfully , unlocking the door to let him in. 

Hanbin took the elevator up and when he exited he saw Mrs. Kim standing in the doorway waiting for him.

“Hanbin!” She opened her arms wide to hug him.

“It's been awhile auntie. Are you well?” Hanbin smiled at her.

“I’m well, I’m well. It’s been such a long time!”

“How are you, son?” She hugged him and pulled him inside.

She let go of him so that he could take his shoes off.

“I’m fine, my parents send their regards.” Hanbin said.

“My mother asked me to deliver this.” Hanbin handed her the bag with the box.

“Oh, thank you.” She took the bag and brought ut to the kitchen, placing it on teh counter.

“Would you like something, something to drink and a snack?” 

“No, I’m good. Thank you.” 

“Well, my husband is returning soon please stay until then.”

“Yes, I will.” Hanbin did feel taht he didn’t want to overstay his welcome, but he really didn’t want to have a bad relationship with The Kim’s despite his resolve regarding Jiwon.

‘Make yourself at home, I hav eto finish doing the laundry.” 

“OK.” Hanbin was a little flustered, an uncomfortable feeling filled the pit of his stomach. 

The notion saddened him, he used to feel so comfortable here, he’s had tons of fun.

He wandered along the most familiar part, to the door at the end of the hallway: as he stood before it he slowly reached for the handle, he swallowed hard before his hand closed on the door handle.

He opened the door, staring into the dark room.

He reached inside the door and fumbled for the lightswitch, he flicked it and looked at a room that was both familiar and unfamiliar to him.

Most of the traces of Jiwon’s childhood had been reduced to just a few pictures and a few objects.

Hanbin took a few steps inside and looked around, the walls were covered by new posters, some familiar posters that had been there since high school, but most traces of Jiwon’s high school self were also gone.

Hanbin walked over to the desk to look at the photos on it: he saw the familiar picture of Jiwon with his family, it made hims mile a little.

He saw pictures of him and his older brother and next to it a picture of the two of them from high school.

Hanbin took the picture to take a closer look, he was filled with a nostalgic feeling looking at his younger self, grinning sheepishly, Jiwon hanging onto his shoulder. 

He touched the glass with his fingers, his fingertips grazing iver Jiwon’s face,

There were rampant footsteps that caught his attention, and he turned to look at Jiwon, who stormed into the room, coming directly towards him.

“Hanbin!” He barked.

Hanbin was so shocked by his sudden appearance that he dropped the photo, which feel to the ground and the next thing he heard was the glass breaking.

“Shit!” He cursed and stooped down and grabbed the frame, but in his haste he cut himself.

Hanbin winced letting go of the frame and looking atbhis finger, the blood started running down the length of his index finger, in his shocked state he didn’t know what to do.

‘Hey!” Jiwon rushed at him and grabbed his injured hand, looking closely at it.

“Don’t just stand there, come on!” He moved Hanbin so that he wouldn’t step on the broken pieces of glass and then dragged him to the bathroom.

“Oh, my Jiwon what happened?” His mother had heard the commotion and met them on the way to the bathroom.

“I surprised him and he dropped a picture he was holding, he cut himself when he tried to pick it up.” Jiwon explained in a hurry as he continued to walk to the bathroom.

“Need any help?” 

“No, I can manage, I’ll shout if I need anything.” He said as they reached the bathroom and he shoved Hanbin inside.

“Put it under running water” Jiwon said and pushed Hanbin in front of him towards the sink.

Hanbin didn’t protest, he just let Jiwon do what he wanted.

“Sit.” Jiwon ordered, pushing Hanbin to the toilet.

Hanbin silently followed and put the lid down to sit on the toilet.

Jiwon was looking through the cabinets, he stopped at the very bottom of one and kept on bustling before he appeared with the first aid box.

Jiwon sat down in front of Hanbin, he opened the box and pulled out disinfectant and a cotton ball as well as a band aid.

Jiwon grabbed Hanbin’s hand and pulled it towards himself, he started to dab the cotton ball onto the wound and cleaned it.

Jiwon glanced up at Hanbin, who pretended not to notice and kept on staring hard at his own hand.

However, the silence was becoming awkward so Hanbin felt compelled to say something.

“Sorry, about the picture….” he grumbled, finally glancing at Jiwon to catch his reaction.

“Don't worry about a replaceable frame, you dummy.” Jiwon said darkly.

“Sorry.” 

Jiwon sighed.

“Hey, you haven't been replying to my texts… why are you ignoring me?” Jiwon glanced up at Hanbin who sucked on his lower lip for a second while figuring out what to say.

“I'm just a little mad at you… it's no big deal…” he grumbled finally, but refused to look at Jiwon.

“You know I don't like it when you're mad at me… and if you won't talk to me, we can't resolve anything either…”

“You know, I never thought you were the type to speak badly about people in a such a horrible way…” Hanbin confessed, even if it was only part of the problem.

“I'm just trying to protect you from being caught up in weird rumours.”

“I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself.” Hanbin huffed, a sense of annoyance was filling him.

“Hey, don’t be like that.” Jiwon looked up at him, his eyes looked kinda sad, but Hanbin was too annoyed at this point.

It was almost like Jiwon was trying to gain sympathy in order to force Hanbin to forgive him.

With his frustration building Hanbi huffed, refusing to answer Jiwon at all.

Jiwon opened his mouth yet again to say something, but he was interrupted by his phone ringing.

Jiwon reached into his pocket, and by the look on his face Hanbin could tell that it was his girlfriend calling.

Jiwon hesitated for a moment, and seemed to be contemplating not answering.

“Go ahead.” Hanbin huffed, but his annoyed tone escaped him before he could stop himself.

Jiwon looked at him, the phone stopped ringing for a second then started again.

“Must be important... just answer it.” Hanbin said, Jiwon’s indecisiveness was fueling his frustration and Jiwon could tell.

“What’’s up with you?” Jiwon leaned back, his phone stopped rining yet again, but immediately started again.

“Just answer it already this is the third time i’s ringing!” Hanbin was starting to get angry now.

Hanbin reached down and grabbed the bandaid that Jiwon had placed on his thigh and stood up abruptly.

“What on earth is going on? I have no idea why you’re suddenly so mad, it’s just a phone call, whether I answer it or not is up to me!”

Jiwon huffed a few times.

“Right now I wanna get things cleared between us!”

Jiwon stood up and grabbed Hanbin who had just finished putting the bandaid on.

He turned Hanbin around and was met by that familiar death glare.

Hanbin averted his gaze as soon as he saw Jiwon’s shock.

“Whatever, I’m leaving.” Hanbin pulled away from Jiwon and made for the door.

“Wait!” Jiwon shouted and came after him grabbing his wrist.

“Call your girlfriend back, she’ll be worried.” Hanbin said and tried shake Jiwon off, but he refused to let go.

“You’re mad at my girlfriend?” Jiwon asked sounding confused and a little desperate.

Hanbin turned around to look at Jiwon.

“No, I’ve barely met her!” Hanbin spat.

“Boys, what is going on?!” Jiwon’s mum came in the. Door looking flustered.

“Nothing, Mrs. Kim. I’ll be going now.” Hanbin forced a smile for her and bowed slightly as he walked out.

In the living room he saw Mr. Kim and quickly greeted him and pardoned himself before Jiwon could follow him.

Once he was out the door he started running, just in case Jiwon came after him.

Hanbin reached the bus stop just as the bus arrived, it wasn't the right bus but he didn’t care he rushed to board it just as it’s doors closed.

He sat down in a seat near the door wheezing, he looked out the window but didn’t see Jiwon.

He felt relieved, and got off at the next stop.

He looked at the bus schedule and saw that the bus he had tro take wouldn’t arrive for another 10 minutes.

He pulled out his phone and found Yunhyeong’s number, he hit the contact to make the call.

Yunhyeong picked up just after a few rings.

“Yunhyeong, meet me at XX station let’s watch movies and get drunk!” Hanbin said loudly before Yunhyeong had even said a single thing.

“Oo-kay” was all the other man managed to say before Hanbin cut the call.

A bus ride and a train ride later Hanbin arrived at the station a little calmer than when he’d first started his journey.

He found Yunhyeong waiting by the entrance to the station and together they hit up the local convenience store and bought both beer and soju and quite a few snacks.

Hanbin left all the goods with Yunhyeong to run into the video rental store and came back with a small bag in his hand.

“Why are we renting DVDs?” Yunhyeong asked.

“Because they don’t have these movies on TV rental.” Hanbin said coldly.

“Geez, I hope you’ll tell me what’s got you so wound up.” Yunhyeong sighed.

When they arrived at Hanbin’s apartment, he opened the door and let Yunhyeong in.

“Hey, your place is nice.” 

“Thanks, just sit wherever, I’ll get us some glasses and stuff.” Hanbin said and wandered off towards what had to be the kitchen.

When he came back he had two glasses and some plates and bowles in his hands which he placed on the table and the two of them started pouring snacks into bowles and opening a beer each.

Hanbin got up after the first sip and found the bag with the DVD’s in.

He wandered over to the TV and inserted the disc into the TV and returned to sofa and grabbed the remote.

“So what is this?” Yunhyeong asked as Hanbin started the movie.

Hanbin started explaining the movie, but it didn’t make much sense to Yunhyeong even as the movie progressed it didn’t become any clearer, though, the alcohol probably didn’t help.

By the end of the movie the two men were pretty smashed and Yunhyeong felt he wasn’t far from dozing off.

“Hey, are you gon’ tell me what's up wit you today?” He asked drunkenly sitting up a little.

Hanbin who’d just taken the last sip of what had to be his third can of beer, glanced over at Yunhyeong and sighed deeply.

“Remember how I had to go home today?” 

“Yeah?”

“Well… my mum asked me to deliver something to Jiwon’s parents.”

Hanbin paused for a split second.

“And while I was there he came there, and long story short we had an argument and I got mad and I ran out.”

Hanbin fell silent.

“What’d you argue about?” Yunhyeong looked at Hanbin.

“Everything and nothing, we didn’t finish a single argument. Everything just melted together and remained unresolved… it’s fucking frustrating…”

“I see…” Yunhyeong tried to be sympathetic despite his drunken state.

“You know what’s so fucking weird?” Hanbin asked suddenly sounding agitated, but he didn’t wait for an answer.

“We've Kissed and jerked each other off, that bastard was a lousy drunk. Threw me for a loop and didn’t remember jackshit the next day!”

Yunhyeong sat up, this was shocking information.

“Wh-what?!” He blinked in confusion.

“Yeah, can you believe it? That fucker!” Hanbin groaned and threw the empty beer can at the wall.

“Oops…!” He chortled.

“Hey, Hanbin.” Yunhyeong began, but he wasn’t certain if he wanted to say it.

“Yeah?” Hanbin was now looking up at the ceiling.

“Are you sure he isn’t into you?” Yunhyeong said in almost a whisper, almost as if hoping that Hanbin wouldn’t hear him.

Hanbin started chortling, which soon turned into a high pitched laughter that filled the room.

“Didn’t you hear him? He hates gays!” Hanbin threw his arms down, hitting. the sofa cushion and the armrest.

“Ouch!” He yelped and grabbed his left arm.

“You sure he-” Yunhyeong began but Hanbin cut him off.

“I don’t wanna talk about that bastard anymore! He can rot in hell for all I care!” Hanbin yelled.

Yunhyeong lunged towards him and clasped his hand over Hanbin’s mouth.

“Shhh! It’s almost midnight we have to be quiet.” Yunhyeong said in a hushed voice.

They fell silent, staring at each other.

Hanbin blinked several times, searching Yunhyeong’s face. 

“What?” Yunhyeong asked, his eyes also searched Hanbin’s face since he wasn’t saying anything.

Hanbin reached up and pulled Yunhyeong’s hand away from his face, he grabbed his other arm and held Yunhyeong in place in front of him.

Yunhyeong wasn’t sure what Hanbin was up to until he started to move towards him.

Hanbin’s eyes kept darting all over as he closed the distance between them.

Yunhyeong felt his heart rate escalate, he waited for the moment where their lips would touch.

Hanbin tilted his head to the side, and let their lips collide softly.

It wasn’t a deep kiss, just a soft touch of lips.

They broke apart and leaned away from each other, Yunhyeong could feel his face burning.

“Haha, your face is red.” Hanbin said meekly, smiling broadly.

“Shut up.” Yunhyeong grumbled, embarrassed as he kept touching his cheeks with his fingers and palm.

Yunhyeong sat down in the post where he’d previously been sitting, his mind racing with what ad just happened.

The sofa creaked and the weight shifted and Yunhyeong turned his head to see Hanbin coming towards him on his knees, one hand opening his shirt.

“This fucking shirt!” He hissed and stopped to yank it off over his head.

Yunhyeong could feel himself getting more flustered, his face growing hotter than before and blood rushing to his groin as Hanbin’s bare skin was presented to him.

He looked Hanbin up and down, from his lean muscles and his entirely bare upper body: everything that he’d only been imagining was suddenly there in front of him.

Hanbin closed the distance between them and was suddenly hovering in front of him yet again.

Yunhyeong couldn’t think straight as he looked at the other man, blood seemed to be rushing to other parts of his body and his skin suddenly started tingling.

The two men were so preoccupied with one another that neither heard the sound of the door opening.

“Hanbin, I- What the fuck are you doing??!!!” Jiwon dropped the bag he was holding and came rushing at them, he grabbed Hanbin’s shoulder and pushed him back at the same time as he grabbed Yunhyeong’s arm and yanked him away.

Hanbin who had almost fallen off the sofa, was pissed as he got to his feet.

Hanbin stepped over the back of the sofa and grabbed Jiwon’s arm, the one that he was still holding Yunhyeong with and forced him to let go.

“What the fuck, Jiwon!!??” Hanbin threw Jiwon’s arm away from himself.

Jiwon looked confused and shocked, he clearly didn’t have a single clue what to do or say.

“Also, I’m pretty sure Hanbin was the one who was gonna kiss me…” Yunhyeong commented, looking up at the two.

Hanbin shot him a death glare with a clear message: you’re not helping.

Yunhyeong chuckled and turned to face the TV.

Jiwon looked at Hanbin.

He opened his mouth a few times, but not a sound escaped him. 

“I think you should leave now, Jiwon.” Hanbin said in a low voice.

Jiwon looked ahead of him, Hnabin couldn’t tell what he was looking at, he seemed to be looking at absolutely nothing. 

Hanbin sighed, his heart was beating a mile a minute, and his chest felt tight and hurt a lot as he reached up and grabbed Jiwon’s shoulder with a firm grip.

Jiwon looked at him with wide eyes.

“Leave, Jiwon.” Hanbin almost pleaded and pushed him with his hand, forcing him to turn.

Hanbin felt the tears pressing on his eyes, so he hurriedly grabbed Jiwon and forced him towards the door.

Hanbin brabbed Jiwon’s bag as they passed it.

“Ha-!” Jiwon suddenly found his voice as he was being pushed towards the entrance, but he was cut off by Hanbin,

“Leave now.” Hanbin did his best to stop his voice from shaking as they arrived at the front door.

He shoved Jiwon's bag into the man's arms, the force made Jiwon lean back a little.

Jiwon stood in front of his shoes, which he’d kicked off when he was coming in.

“If you don't get moving, I’m gonna kick you out.” He warned in a dark hiss, but he refused to look at Jiwon’s face anymore.

Slowly, Jiwon bent down and out his shoes on, when he stood up he remained there for a split second with his back turned, after a short while he left without a word or a last glance.

Hanbin waited until he was almost certain he had left, he slumped against the wall and slid down while leaning heavily against it.

Hanbin had lost all strength and huddled up with his back against the wall, pulling his knees close to his body.

As Yunhyeong appeared and touched his shoulder, he could no longer remain silent and started sobbing loudly, like a small child: everything hurt, his face his head, his stomach and everything was a just a lump of pain and agony.

Yunhyeong gave him a hug as best he could manage in their awkward position, but he let go and sat down next to him, and waited for Hanbin to calm down.

After a while Yunhyeong helped Hanbin to bed, and the man instantly fell asleep.

Yunhyeong sighed and wandered back to the sofa, he lay there, thinking about Hanbin, and Jiwon, and all the other things that were running through his head, but before he knew it he had also fallen asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

Hanbin did his best to distract himself, and to avoid any place where Jiwon might show up.

He would often visit Yunhyeong’s place and he avoided being home as much as possible, just in case Jiwon came poking around.

He really couldn’t stomach the thought of seeing, much less speaking with Jiwon right now.

He had even brought some of his stuff over to Yunhyeong’s apartment, and would spend most of his time curled up on Yunhyeong’s bed in an old blanket he’d brought from home.

Yunhyeong said nothing, which he was grateful for. 

After almost a week and a half had passed of Hanbin simply laying in his blanket did he crawl down onto the floor besides Yunhyeong who was using his laptop.

“Oh hoho, it’s alive! You feeling better?” Yunhyeong asked with a sarcastic tone, without looking at Hanbin.

“Funny.” Hanbin replied monotonously.

“Can I lean on you for a bit?” Hanbin asked.

Yunhyeong stopped typing for a moment before he cleared his throat.

“Sure..”

Hanbin scooted over and sat next to him, leaning his head on Yunhyeong’s shoulder.

Yunhyeong sat up straight and stopped working on the laptop.

Hanbin sat up as well.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to…” Hanbin started feeling guilty about bothering Yunhyeong, he was already inconveniencing him so much already.

“You’re not hindering me, dummy.” Yunhyeong sighed and reached up to pat Hanbin’s head.

“You’re too kind to me, Yunhyeong.” Hanbin grumbled.

Yunhyeong chuckled, he kept patting Hanbin’s head for a little before he turned around and suddenly Hanbin found himself being embraced by Yunhyeong.

He could feel the man's breath on his ear, and they sat like that for a moment, before Yunhyeong took a deep breath.

“Just forget about that asshole and fall for me instead.”

Hanbin felt his heart jump and continued to beat erratically. 

He used his arms and hands to separate himself from Yunhyeong.

“What are you saying?” Hanbin kept his head lowered as he asked, he really didn't want to see Yunhyeong’s expression.

Hanbin’s fingers were digging into Yunhyeong’s shoulders.

“First of all, ow!” Yunhyeong reached up and grabbed Hanbin’s wrists, pulling his hands away from his shoulders.

“Sorry…” Hanbin mumbled feebly letting Yunhyeong hold his wrists, but the other man soon moved to hold his hands instead, touching his palms delicately before he grabbed ahold of him.

“I know that this makes me seem like a jerk as well, but I want to be honest with you.” Yunhyeong fixed him with a tender and honest look.

“Hanbin, I like you.”

Hanbin was quite shocked, he didn’t know what to say or do, he just gaped several times while trying to find something to say.

“Sorry, it must be quite the shock for you. I wasn’t expecting you to answer anyways, so… I know it’s mean, but you know seeing you hurting like this is painful for me for this reason.” 

They both fell silent, and simply sat there without saying a single word for a long time.

Hanbin could hear the clock ticking, that was how silent it was.

“I’m not expecting anything” Yunhyeong exclaimed suddenly moving away from Hanbin and turning away from him. 

Hanbin felt a bit relieved that he’d moved away from him, he could feel himself start breathing again, but his mind was still buzzing with Yunhyeong’s confession.

“Look, don’t worry about it. Take your time… you know what I’ll head out to the convenience store, do you need anything?” 

Hanbin shook his head.

“OK.” Yunhyeong sounded defeated when he got up and grabbed his jacket, shoving his wallet into his pants pocket and his phone in the other.

“If you change your mind just, uh… call me.”

Hanbin said nothing.

Yunhyeong seemed flustered and as if to correct himself stuttered slightly as he scratched the back of his head.

“You know… about needing anything from the convenience store.”

Hanbin nodded slightly.

“Y-yeah.” 

Yunhyeong left, but Hanbin couldn't shake the awkward feeling.

Things had been good between the two of them ever since he’d gotten to know Yunhyeong, but he never expected things to turn out like this.

While he mulled things over in his mind, the awkwardness grew and before he knew it he was on his feet and had grabbed all his stuff.

He stopped for a second, thinking of how silly he was being, after all he was the one who had considered using Yunhyeong as a sort of rebound when he was drunk, after all Yunhyeong was a nice guy. 

He was also gay, like himself and seemed like a decent guy over all, but thinking of Jiwon, Hanbin’s chest started to ache.

Hanbin took a deep breath, he took a firm grip on his things and walked out the door, the lock engaging automatically behind him.

Once he was on the subway he texted Yunhyeong, he really didn’t know what to say so he kept deleting what he’d written.

[“I’m sorry.”] 

Was what he ended up with, he knew it was horrible, but he really couldn’t come up with anything at the moment.

He put his phone away and ignored the buzz of what had to be several texts and at least one call. 

His mind was buzzing when he arrived at his apartment, he opened the door and went inside.

He threw his stuff on the couch and hunched over, his hands on top of the couch as he leaned on it. 

He sighed deeply, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and looked at the texts and tow missed calls. 

Now what was he going to do? 

He was avoiding his childhood friend, and now the one man he had come to consider his friend.

He honestly felt like crying, he felt the tears welling in his eyes and aggressively wiped them away with the back of his hand.

The doorbell suddenly rang, startling him, while walking he glanced at himself in the mirror, hoping that his eyes weren’t red.

Without checking he opened the door still rubbing his eyes. 

Wordlessly the man outside grabbed his wrist and forced his way inside.

Hanbin’s eyes widened as he stared at Jiwon’s face.

“Finally.” He said in a low voice.

Jiwon was fully inside before Hanbin could say or do anything.

Jiwon locked the door and kicked his shoes off, still holding Hanbin by the wrist as he made his way inside.

Hanbin was so flustered that he still hadn’t been able to resist.

Once they were inside Jiwon let go of Hanbin’s wrist, but remained standing in front of him, looking him up and down.

“Where the hell have you been all this time?” His tone was still dark, almost menacing. 

Hanbin couldn’t find his voice and simply stared at Jiwon.

“Don’t tell me you’ve been staying with that Yunhyeong guy?!” 

Jiwon spoke as if it was something dirty and disgusting, which irked Hanbin out of his silence.

“Shut up!! That’s none of your business!” 

“Oh, but it is, since it’s me you’ve been avoiding!”

Hanbin opened his mouth to protest, but obviously what Jiwon said was the truth so he couldn’t say anything.

Jiwon sighed.

He suddenly moved to remove his jacket, putting it over the back of the couch.

Silently, he walked around the couch and sat down.

He sighed deeply, but he didn’t say anything.

Hanbin felt conflicted, he didn’t feel that he was ready to speak with Jiwon just yet, but now he felt like the other wasn’t giving him much of a choice.

He turned around and grabbed his own stuff off the couch and put them on the coffee table instead. 

Hanbin sat down in the opposite end of the couch.

There was a long pause. 

“Hanbin…” Jiwon said, still in that dark tone.

“Are you dating that Yunhyeong guy?”

Hanbin looked at Jiwon, he was staring straight ahead but at seemingly nothing at all.

“No.”

“Are you…”

Jiwon paused, taking a deep breath as if the words were difficult to utter.

“Are you in.. in l-love with him?”

Hanbin frowned.

“No.” 

“Do you like him at all?” Jiwon seemed a little less tense now.

“As a friend…”

Jiwon’s shoulders seemed to drop, and Hanbin could see him become a little less tense.

“Look I have somebody else that I like so…” 

Jiwon’s head snapped in his direction, so fast he could hear his neck crack.

The look on his face was difficult to understand.

“You have someone you like?!!?” Jiwon shouted.

“Who??!!” Jiwon leaned towards him.

Hanbin was confused by Jiwon’s wild expression.

Feeling flustered Hanbin tore his eyes away from Jiwon.

“What even is this conversation??!!” Hanbin rubbed his face, feeling a wide range of emotions welling up inside him.

The desperation oozing off of Jiwon was what confused him the most, but after thinking about it for a little bit it dawned on him. 

Feeling suddenly angry again he looked at Jiwon yet again, who hadn’t moved an inch since he’d looked away.

“Do you really hate the fact that I’m gay that much?!?!”


	9. Chapter 9

“Do you really hate the fact that I’m gay that much?!?!” The words ripped through his throat, fueled with anger and frustration.

Hanbin’s hands balled into fists and he could feel his face turning red as all the blood rushed to his head, he was getting ready to fight Jiwon if he had to.

Jiwon recoiled as Hanbin’s intense revolt hit him.

He turned his face away again, and reached up to hold onto either sides of his face as he mumbled something that Hanbin couldn’t hear because his ears were ringing with rage.

“What?!” Hanbin spat a little harder than he realized was necessary.

“I said, that’s not it!” Jiwon said loudly, his suddenly tiny figure and the way his voice sort of cracked made Hanbin lose his momentum, and he cooled down almost as quickly as he had exploded.

“I could never hate you! Even during stupid fights when I said I did I never, ever meant i!” Jiwon’s voice was strained and his hands were trembling slightly.

He let his hands fall from his head and held one hand in the other, rubbing them intently.

“It’ just so frustrating, all this time!” Jiwon grumbled on.

He leaned over the back of the sofa, again bringing his hands to his face and sighing deeply.

“I seriously don’t have any idea what this conversation is about anymore….” Hanbin admitted, turning towards the TV again.

While his head was cooling down, and cleared enough for every thought to come crashing down at once, honestly he had a headache.

Before either of them could say anything the doorbell rang.

Hanbin hesitated, but it rang again so he got to his feet and walked over to look out the peephole.

“Yunhyeong…” he said calmly as the doorbell rang yet again.

Just as he was about to unlock the door he felt Jiwon grabbing him from behind and pulling him back before pushing him to the wall, pinning him there by placing his arms on either side of Hanbin's head.

Flustered by the sudden action Hanbin stared at Jiwon.

“It’s him again?” Jiwon growled.

Hanbin didn’t say anything, he just tore his gaze away.

Jiwon sighed.

“Geez, I hate how he comes around so… casually.”

“It’s none of your business, he’s just worried about me…”

“Worried about you?! That damned snake!” Jiwon hissed darkly.

“I suddenly left… after he confessed to me, obviously he would feel concerned.” Hanbin admitted, he really didn’t know what he was trying to accomplish by telling Jiwon this, but the reaction was instantaneous. 

Hanbin shuddered at the look in Jiwon’s eyes, which he could only describe as pure fury.

“Confessed?!” His voice was barely a whisper.

“Ye-” But he was cut off as Jiwon came at him, forcefully pressing his lips to his.

Hanbin’s eyes widened in shock, though it had happened a few times when Jiwon had been wasted, this was completely different.

Hanbin felt his body freeze up momentarily, and his mind was racing but he instinctively put his arms up and against Jiwon’s chest and pushed.

Jiwon stumbled backwards a few steps, but his wild eyes were locked on Hanbin as he returned, flinging his arm around Hanbin’s waist and pulling him into yet another kiss.

It was violent at first, but then it calmed and seemed only desperate.

Jiwon’s hand fumbled, trembling violently.

He pulled away slightly.

“I won’t give you to him… I won’t give you to anyone!” Jiwon growled before he consumed Hanbin’s lips yet again.

Hanbin was confused, the places where Jiwon’s body was in contact with his were tingling like crazy, and he felt hot all over and his head was spinning more violently with every passing second.

Yet he didn’t know what to do, somehow it felt wrong even though he wanted it. 

Only after a short while, as the initial shock lifted did Hanbin become aware of a wet feeling on his face, running down his neck.

He looked at Jiwon who had tears running down his cheeks.

Hanbin put his arms between them and pushed Jiwon away.

As they separated Jiwon seemed to falter completely, he sank to his knees on the floor in front of Hanbin, and Hanbin followed, dropping to his knees and holding Jiwon’s arms.

Jiwon grabbed onto Hanbin, his grip painfully digging into his arms.

“I hate this…” His voice cracked as he said it, choked by tears.

“I hate how my mind is screaming at me that this is wrong… and yet it feels so... good.” Jiwon moved his grip and reached up to touch Hanbin's face.

His tear stained face, red eyes and runny nose made for a pathetic appearance. 

“What the hell are you even saying?!” Hanbin felt the tears brimming in his eyes.

Jiwon’s hands fell from Hanbin’s face and down to his chest where he grabbed Hanbin’s clothes. 

“Jiwon…” Hanbin said feebly, and he watched the other smile happily though he was still sad.

“You finally called my name like you used to…” Jiwon’s voice was shaky the entire time.

“You idiot…” Hanbin felt the tears running down his face.

“Don’t cry…” Jiwon whimpered and lifted one hand to wipe away Hanbin's tears.

“Right back at yeah, ya dummy!” Hanbin groaned and grabbed Jiwon, pulling him into a hug.

“Ah, it’s been so long…” Jiwon whispered, his hands stroking all over Hanbin’s back.

It was a strange sensation, though Jiwon had hugged him many times in the past it had never felt like this.

Jiwon pulled on Hanbin, pressing their bodies together.

“Please, oh god please, tell me who you love…” Jiwon forced out in a strained voice. 

Hanbin opened his mouth but only a choked sob escaped him, so he closed his eyes and gathered himself.

“It’s you… I love you…” Hanbin confessed, his heart felt like it was about to leave his body.

Jiwon let a shuddering sob escape him as he squeezed Hanbin tightly.

“Oh, thank god…” Jiwon sobbed, his face now buried in the nok of Hanbin’s neck.

They stopped speaking, all they did was cry in each others arms.

Hanbin didn’t know how long they’d been sitting on the floor like this, he only knew that Jiwon was falling asleep in his arms, which was both adorable and a little annoying. 

“Come on.” Hanbin said, his voice was strained and his voice hurt.

He pulled Jiwon up somehow, the man awok slightly and followed Hanbin into the bedroom where Hanbin got him into bed.

Jiwon rolled over and was fast asleep.

Hanbin went and got washed up, when he returned he stared at Jiwon who was sprawled out on his bed.

He sucked on his bottom lip, his heart pounding in his ears as he looked at Jiwon on the bed.

For a split second he considered sleeping on the couch instead.

He felt a pang in his chest as he entertained the thought: was he really going to let this opportunity go to waste? 

What if Jiwon woke up in the morning and said this had all been a mistake?

Hanbin shuddered at the thought and took a determined step towards the bed.

He stood there at the edge of the bed, staring intently at Jiwon.

To his surprise Jiwon opened his eyes, and without saying anything smiled goofily, reached out and grabbed his wrist and pulled him down onto the bed.

Hanbin toppled over, landing on one knee on one side of Jiwon along with his left hand, while his right hand was on the other side of Jiwon. 

His heart started to race, it had been so many years since they’d last shared the bed and Hanbin was nervous especially now that he had confessed his feelings.

He could feel his face grown hot and he was definitely bothered.

Jiwon reached up, his hands around Hanbin’s neck and pulled him down, their bodies were now pressed together and Hanbin could feel his heart beat wildly, but there was a second wild thumping against his chest.

As he realized that Jiwon’s heart was also racing he felt serene, it was an immense feeling that made his body light as a feather and he felt like he was floating.

Jiwon’s hand slid from his neck, down his shoulder and traced along the length of his back.

Jiwon groaned, his fingers spreading out and caressing Hanbin’s back.

Hanbin, who hadn't dared to touch Jiwon, slowly reached up and touch the top of his head, his fingers combing through the man’s hair, leaning forward he nuzzled his nose into Jiwon’s neck and the familiar yet different scent filled his nostrils.

Jiwon chuckled, his other hand moved into Hanbin’s hair, almost following the motions that Hanbin had done to him, his fingers moving eagerly.

Jiwon groaned a little annoyed as his other hand tried to pull Hanbin closer.

“Don’t fight me.” Jiwon grumbled sleepily. 

Hanbin made a sound that told Jiwon he felt awkward, which only made JIwon chuckle.

“Like this then…” Jiwon mumbled and shifted to lie on his back, he took Hanbin’s hand and intertwined their fingers, forcing Hanbin to lie down next to him. 

Hanbin lay there in silence, he could hear Jiwon’s soft breathing and assumed that he had fallen asleep yet again.

Hanbin squeezed Jiwon’s hand gently, and Jiwon took a deep breath next to him.

The situation was oddly comforting, and yet surrealistic.

Never in his wildest dreams had he imagined this scenario, and as he could no longer fight the tiredness in his body he prayed that this was all real and that Jiwon wouldn’t change his mind suddenly in the morning.


	10. Chapter 10

Hanbin woke with a start, he opened his eyes and found himself staring right at someone’s neck.

For a split second he couldn’t remember what was going on, but after waking up some more he remembered what had happened the night before.

Only after getting over the initial confusion did he realize he was wrapped in Jiwon’s embrace, the other man’s arms wrapped around him and his head resting on top of his. 

Hanbin felt his heart start to beat erratically, and his face grew hot.

He swallowed hard as he decided to lean forward and bury his face into Jiwon.

As he moved he heard Jiwon stirr, but he didn’t care.

He slowly moved his arms and wrapped them around Jiwon as well, pulling them closer together.

Jiwon groaned, and moved a lot so Hanbin realized that he was definitely waking up.

Hanbin was suddenly struck by the notion that he had to pretend that none of what had happened yesterday was real.

He quickly separated himself from Jiwon, his mind racing as he sat bolt upright, trying to figure out what he was going to do.

Jiwon opened his eyes, he saw Hanbin sitting next to him, and he was filled with a nostalgic feeling at first before he remembered Hanbin’s words from last night. 

With his heart leaping with joy he sat up next to Hanbin and was about to touch him and hug him when he was suddenly overcome by embarrassment.

Jiwon felt annoyed with himself again, his chest clenched painfully.

Jiwon sighed suddenly and moved closer to Hanbin who was slightly shocked as Jiwon moved closer.

Jiwon sucked on his lips, letting his tongue run over them as he inched closer, but as he was mer inches from Hanbin’s face, Hanbin grimace.

“Ew! Your breath stinks!” He exclaimed and held his hand in front of his mouth and nose.

Jiwon blushed.

“You’re breath isn’t exactly fresh either…” He grumbled.

Hanbin blushed as well and gave Jiwon a dirty look, but the other man grinned and grabbed Hanbin’s wrist and pulled him along as he moved from the bed.

He dragged Hanbin to the bathroom and found an extra tooth brush for himself and put toothpaste on both his and Hanbin’s before shoving it into Hanbin’s hand.

Hanbin stared at the toothbrush that Jiwon had given him, he then looked at the other man who had already started brushing his teeth.

The strangest, most heartwarming feeling filled Hanbin’s entire body: standing in the bathroom brushing his teeth along side Jiwon was obviously something he’d done before, but this time the feeling that filled the entire bathroom was completely different.

Their eyes met in the mirror, and Jiwon grinned broadly, the toothpaste frothing out of his mouth forcing him to dive down to the sink, making Hanbin chuckle.

The intimacy was creating an electric feeling, and also a sense of warmth.

Jiwon looked at him, he grabbed Hanbin’s arm and brought the toothbrush to his mouth as if telling him to hurry.

Hanbin started to brush his teeth, he looked at Jiwon who was still watching him and he could see Jiwon blushing slightly.

After having spat out the resulting foam there was a small explosion as Jiwon suddenly moved, Hanbin’s back hit the wall as Jiwon tackled him pressing their lips together.

Hanbin dropped his toothbrush on the floor from surprise and suddenly had Jiwon’s tongue inside his mouth.

Any thought Hanbin had had about forgetting yesterday's events were thrown out the window as Jiwon wrapped his arms around him so hard that he felt every inch of them on his body.

Jiwon’s tongue moved rapidly inside his mouth, stroking against the insides of his cheeks and wrestling with his tongue.

Hanbin couldn’t help but moan and he felt the strength in his legs leave him and he was fully leaning on Jiwon.

Jiwon separated from Hanbin for a second, and a string of saliva connected them briefly before it broke.

Hanbin was left to catch his breath after being kissed so intensely.

“Jesus, you making up for lost time or what?” Hanbin laughed a little as he said it.

Jiwon smirked.

“Hell yeah!” 

He then dived back in and kissed Hanbin’s cheek before he kissed his way over to his nose and kissed the tip lightly.

“Ouch! Watch the stubble!” Hanbin complained.

“Shut up, you also got some..” Jiwon grumbled, running his fingers over Hanbin’s chin.

Jiwon leaned in and used his nose to nuzzle Hanbin’s, making the other embarrassed, it was way more embarrassing than the sloppy kiss from just moments ago.

Jiwon started kissing him again, he made his way down and along Hanbin’s jaw and   
down to Hanbin’s neck, sucking on the soft skin. 

Hanbin couldn’t help but moan, he tilted his head to the side to expose his neck to Jiwon.

He could feel Jiwon sucking his skin into his mouth. 

“Ahn… what’re you doing?” Hanbin huffed, but he didn’t try to stop Jiwon.

He detached himself and looked up at Hanbin, his face was flushed but he seemed determined.

“Insect repellent.” Jiwon hissed and moved places and started sucking in a different spot.

Hanbin’s brain couldn’t understand what he was saying anymore, so he simply closed his eyes and let his hands wander all over Jiwon’s back.

The feeling in his palms was addictive, he didn’t want to let go of Jiwon, his fingers pulling and tugging and digging into Jiwon’s back.

Hanbin’s right hand wandered up Jiwon’s back and found its way into Jiwon’s hair.

His fingers combed through the fine dark strands and he pushed Jiwon’s head into himself.

Jiwon detached himself, and Hanbin could feel his skin stinging where Jiwon had been sucking.

Jiwon was panting slightly, his hands now roaming all over Hanbin’s body, every part of the man that he could reach he made sure to caress. 

Hanbin’s body was trembling slightly, he took several calming breaths his own hands touching Jiwon all over.

“Ah, shit!” Jiwon sighed and buried his face in Hanbin’s shoulder.

Jiwon took several deep breaths in through his nose. 

“You smell good..” He mumbled in a low voice, his breath tickling Hanbin’s skin.

“Stupid…” Hanbin grumbled in a hushed voice, feeling embarrassed.

“Hey..” Jiwon said suddenly taking Hanbin by surprise.

“W-what?” Hanbin couldn't help but stutter as he waited for what he was going to say.

Jiwon straightened up, pressing his lower body to Hanbin.

Hanbin felt his heart leap as he felt Jiwon’s hard dick pressing against him.

Feeling flustered Hanbin didn’t have a clue how to react.

Jiwon chortled, rolling his hips slightly.

“Stop grinding on me…” Hanbin complained, pouting.

“Don’t wanna…” Now Jiwon was the one pouting.

Hanbin blushed a deep scarlet.

He was happy that he was able to get such a reaction from Jiwon, but it was incredibly embarrassing.

The sound of Jiwon’s phone ringing cut through the tension in the air like a knife and ruined the mood.

“You… You should probably get that!” Hanbin exclaimed in a high pitched voice.

Jiwon stared at him for a moment, sighed and detached himself from Hanbin, making his way out of the bathroom.

Hanbin slumped down for an instant, sitting with his knees pressed against his chest he took several calming breaths.

“I can’t find my phone…” Jiwon chimed form the living room.

Hanbin got up and walked out of the bathroom, he looked over at Jiwon.

‘Dummy…” Hanbin grumbled, Jiwon’s face widened into a bright grin.

Hanbin’s heart skipped a beat yet again as he rummaged for his own phone.

He found it in the pocket of his jacket and called Jiwon.

“The heck..” jiwon grumbled as he stooped down after the sound and found it under the couch.

He picked it up and looked at screen, his calm smile changed suddenly as he stared at the screen.

While he was looking at it, the phone started ringing again.

Jiwon looked flustered.

From his reaction Hanbin figured who it was that was calling.

Hanbin simply stared at Jiwon, waiting to see what Jiwon would do.

Jiwon clenched his jaw, and decided to put the phone down.

Hanbin’s eyes widened slightly.

“You’re not going to answer?” 

Jiwon sighed, he swiped his finger across the screen a few times before tossing the phone onto the couch. 

“I can’t. I have to figure some things out first I think…” Jiwon said, more to himself than to Hanbin as his eyes darted about while he stared at the floor.

Jiwon’s gaze returned to Hanbin who was simply standing there, unmoving, his heart frozen over at the thought of it being Jiwon’s girlfriend who’d called.

Which was completely reasonable, he would probably also try and get in contact with his partner on a regular basis. 

Hanbin’s train of thought suddenly ran amok, he hated the feeling that now filled his body, a sort of icy cold panic which made him want to run away.

Suddenly Jiwon had grabbed him and wrapped his arms around him, the shock brought Hanbin’s boiling brain to a sudden stop and he looked at Jiwon, but the other quickly buried his face in Hanbin's shoulder.

Jiwon picked Hanbin up with ease and carried him back into the bedroom.

Hanbin’s brain went blank as Jiwon threw him down on the bed and Hanbin could see the pained look on Jiwon’s face.

“I don’t want you to think about it… I just need to sort this out…” He said with a sad look on his face.

Jiwon leaned over Hanbin, his hand instantly traveled to Hanbin’s face, caressing the side of it before his hand moved down his neck where his fingers grazed the bruised spots he’d made just moments earlier. 

Jiwon gulped, his heart started to opound loudly in his chest and he swallowed hard as his hand strayed even further down, shi eyes following his hands journey, but he’d also glance up to watch hanbin’s reaction.

Jiwon felt the excitement growing inside, as he could feel Hanbin’s body reacting to his touch as his muscles jolted and moved when he touched them.

Hanbin felt a sense of panic come over him again, he would be lying if he said he’d never imagined this scenario, but it was too sudden.

Jiwon seemed more than willing to risk it all as his hand moved determinedly down Hanbin’s body.

Just as Jiwon’s hand grazed Hanbin’s lower abdomen, did he look up to watch Hanbin’s reaction, which stopped him dead in his tracks. 

Jiwon took a deep breath as his excitement calmed, he removed his hand from Hanbin’s body and returned to his face, caressing and stroking Hanbin’s cheek instead.

Hanbin seemed to relax a little, but he suddenly started stuttering and tears appeared in his eyes.

“I’m sorry…” he mumbled and brought his hands to his face to hide.

Jiwon didn’t know what to say as he watched Hanbin cry.

“Don’t cry…” he mumbled weakly as he scrambled his brain to find any way of comforting him.

Jiwon closed the distance between them and hugged Hanbin, his cheek brushed against Hanbin’s on his way down and he could feel the wetness that was Hanbin’s tears on his own face as he brushed by,

Jiwon could feel Hanbin’s racing heart against his on chest. 

Jiwon silently hugged Hanbin, and Hanbin reached up and around Jiwon, his hands gently laying across Jiwon’s back.

They hugged for a long time, occasionally shifting the weight around, but neither of them said much as they lay there, but both of their minds were racing with various thoughts that neither of them were brave enough to voice out loud.

Jiwon prayed silently that he’d be able to sort things out, but he felt a wave of anxiety wash over him as he imagined in his head how it would go down.

Hanbin must have picked up on Jiwon’s uneasiness as he squirmed slightly and pulled Jiwon in closer, his arms squeezing him slightly and he buried his face in Jiwon’s neck, breathing slowly and deeply as Jiwon’s scent filled his nostrils.

The sensation of feeling Hanbin’s slow breathing on his neck and his tight squeeze made Jiwon Relax somehow.

Neither of them knew how long they’d been laying there, but after a while they both fell asleep yet again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter may be delayed since I haven't even started it yet... and I have been a little busy lately... I hope I can upload as usual, but I can't make any promises... sorry.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notice! Rating changed to Explicit. I mean they're not "kids" so...

Jiwon woke with a start, he groaned, he had a mild headache so he brought his hand to his face and rubbed his forehead with it.

HIs other hand was trapped and when he managed to open his eyes properly did he stare at the back of Hanbin’s bushy head.

He grinned to himself feeling the heat of the others body against his.

He could barely believe he was spooning Hanbin, it seemed like a dream that had been so distant before, but now it was reality.

He tilted his head forward, his face hitting Hanbin’s shoulder.

He breathed in Hanbin’s scent, rubbing his face against him at the same time.

Jiwon started kissing Hanbin’s nape and shoulder lightly, leaving a wet trail of butterfly kisses all the way from Hanbin’s hairline to the neck of his shirt.

Hanbin stirred, stretching and groaning.

“Hey…” Jiwon mumbled in a low husky voice.

Hanbin seemed flustered as he partially turned and Jiwon could see his flushed cheeks. 

“H-hey…” he grumbled back in a gruff voice.

Jiwon chuckled.

“Hey, stop breathing on my neck, it tickles.” Hanbin stuttered as he said it, his hand leapt up to cover the back of his neck.

Jiwon forced back yet another chuckle, and he instead pressed his lips against Hanbin’s hand.

Hanbin made a confused sound and jolted slightly, but Jiwon didn't feel deterred and continued to kiss and suck on Hanbin's hand. 

“Don’t…” Hanbin whimpered, squirming a little.

Jiwon reached around Hanbin, his hand landing on the man’s chest, he started mercilessly groping him.

Hanbin groaned, his free hand moved up to cover his mouth.

Jiwon moved his hand down and slipped it under Hanbin’s shirt.

The feeling of touching his bare skin was exhilarating, rubbing his open palm over Hanbin’s body, feeling his muscles moving under his touch was making him hot and bothered.

“NO, don’t…” Hanbin complained and let go of his neck to grab Jiwon’s arm and remove it from himself.

“I don’t think I can stop…” Jiwon whispered next to Hanbin ear, making Hanbin shudder.

Jiwon kissed Hanbin’s neck again, and he let Hanbin remove his hand so that he could use it to grab Hanbin’s head and turn it around so that he could kiss his mouth.

Hanbin felt his resistance and embarrassment fade as he turned of his own volition and started kissing Jiwon back. 

Jiwon was taken by surprise as. Hanbin grabbed his head and shoved his tongue into his mouth.

Jiwon, feeling his urges guide him let his hand return to Hanbin's’ body, sliding it down Hanbin’s back and slowly, slowly sliding it down across his lower back and over his buttcheek.

Hanbin moaned into the kiss as Jiwon started groping his ass, massaging his buttcheek with intense desire.

Hanbin let his hand fall from Jiwon’s hair and down his body, he’d always liked Jiwon’s large back and yet again his hand was stroking and caressing all over it/

It excited him that the muscles were moving aggressively as Jiwon kept groping his ass.

Their waists collided together, their erections rubbing against the other’s body.

They both separated to let out a few loud moans and ragged breaths as they kept grinding on each other, Jiwon’s hand Hanbin’s ass kept their loins pressed together.

To Jiwon’s surprise, Hanbin’s hand came down to his thigh where he grabbed it, hoisting it up and putting his own thigh in between Jiwon’s legs.

Jiwon hadn’t expected Hanbin to be so aggressive so he grinned and pecked Hanbin’s lips.

Hanbin sucked on Jiwon’s lower lip, rocking his hips back and forth to create friction.

Hanbin ran his tongue over Jiwon’s lower lip before he pushed inside, he could feel Jiwon’s mouth stretch into a grin as he kissed him.

Feeling a little frustrated Jiwon grabbed Hanbin and rolled onto his back, bringing Hanbin with him so that he was on top of him.

Despite feeling a little flustered Hanbin grabbed Jiwon’s head and kissed him hard, letting all his weight fall onto Jiwon.

Jiwon reached up and wrapped his arms firmly around Hanbin’s waist, his heart rate pounding in his ears.

Hanbin rolled his hips, grinding his hard dick on Jiwon’s lower abdomen, he groaned and buried his face in Jiwon’s shoulder, his mind buzzing.

Jiwon reached down and grabbed Hanbin’s ass, and with a firm grip on both cheeks he thrust his hips repeatedly and vigorously upward.

The motion made Hanbin moan loudly, his voice cracked as let the pleasure of Jiwon humping him take over all his senses.

Hanbin’s hands gripped at the bedding next to Jiwon’s head as he ground his own hips downward, making Jiwon groan deep down in his throat. 

The rhythmic rocking became desperate and their ragged breaths and the sound of the clothes they were wearing rubbing together and the bed creaking under them were the only sounds filling the room as they both struggled to keep their voices down.

Desperation filled them and the grinding reflected their desire to cum as they both lost a bit of their senses and rocked their hips hard on one another until they came, breathing heavily, their hearts pounding and sweat beads trailing down their faces and staining their clothes.

“Shit…” Jiwon grumbled, his throat felt dry as he let his hands slowly caress Hanbin’s back. 

Hanbin rolled off of Jiwon, his hands on his chest as he tried to catch his breath.

“That was… intense…” Jiwon said and glanced at Hanbin who was staring at the ceiling. 

Hanbin frowned.

“W-what?” Jiwon suddenly felt anxious.

“I feel gross…” He mumbled, refusing to look at Jiwon.

“What’s the point of feeling embarrassed now?” Jiwon chortled.

Hanbin said nothing and sat up, he made a grossed out face as he looked from straight ahead down at his crotch and then straight ahead again.

“Hey, my pants are soiled to.” 

Hanbin blushed, he really didn’t have a reply to that.

He pulled his knees up, wrapping his arms around them and leaning his head against them.

“Just take a shower.” Jiwon shrugged, sitting up and leaning against the wall.

Hanbin felt a variety of thoughts spinning through his head and he blushed, gulping heavily before opening his mouth.

“Wanna take one together?” 

Just as the last word left him, he felt his face burning hot.

Next to him Jiwon seemed to be completely stunned since he didn’t say another word.

Hanbin turned his head slightly, his fringe falling into his eyes and sort of blocking his sight as he tried to look at Jiwon.

He could see that jiwon was staring at him, a deep scarlet flushed in his cheeks. 

“S-sure…” He looked away and cleared his throat.

They sat motionless for a moment.

Jiwon sat up swallowing hard, he moved restlessly, not knowing how to take the next step.

Hanbin was the one who reached out and grabbed his hand.

He looked at Jiwon with a determined look in his eyes, he squeezed his hand before he started getting up.

Jiwon followed and together they made their way back to the bathroom.

Hanbin was the first one in the door, and he turned swiftly to face Jiwon who came in close and hovered meer inches from him.

Jiwon reached out and grabbed Hanbin’s shirt, gripping the hem of Hanbin’s shirt and started pulling it up, exposing his bare skin. 

Hanbin licked his lips just as the shirt came off over his head.

He felt embarrassed as Jiwon looked at his bare skin with lust in his eyes. 

Jiwon flung the shirt to the side and let his hand slide from Hanbin’s face and down his neck, he marvelled at the hickeys he’d left there before letting his hand travel down Hanbin’s upper body.

Hanbin gulped and took a deep breath before he grabbed the hem of Jiwon's t-shirt and yanked it up, he could see him smirking as the piece of fabric came up to his head, he diligently raised his arms and let Hanbin remove it.

Hanbin let his arms fall to his sides, his right hand still clutching onto the t-shirt as he marveled at the sight before him.

His eyes darted all over the exposed skin, from his collarbones, shoulders and down his sculpted stomach to the hem of his pants.

This time Hanbin made the first move as he dropped the tee and grabbed the button on Jiwon's pants, after undoing it, and partially pulling the zipper down, did he shove his fingers into the pants on either side of Jiwon's hips and yank down, unknowingly pulling Jiwon's underwear along with them.

The suddenness took them both by surprise as Hanbin found himself face to face with Jiwon’s cock.

“D-d- don’t stare!” Jiwon stuttered loudly, his dick twitching as Hanbin watched.

Hanbin swallowed hard, and was about t reach up, but Jiwon grabbed his wrist and stopped him before he could touch the slowly rising member.

Jiwon pulled him up and Hanbin couldn’t stop staring at Jiwon’s scarlet flushed face without cracking into a grin.

Jiwon let go of Hanbin’s arm and grabbed Hanbin’s pants, pulling them clean off his hips, exposing Hanbin’s dick as well.

Once he’d pulled the pants down to Hanbin’s knees did he let go to remove his own pants completely, prompting Hanbin to do the same.

All of a sudden they were completely naked, standing in Hanbin’s tiny bathroom, both men nervously licked their lips.

Jiwon cleared his throat and leaned in and turned the shower on.

“I should put these in the washing machine.” Hanbin said suddenly and reached for their discarded pants, but Jiwon grabbed his arm and pulled him up and into the shower.

He pushed Hanbin against the wall, the water rushing down over them.

JIwon locked his gaze with Hanbin’s, leaning in and kissing him roughly on the mouth, his hands squeezing Hanbin’s wrists. 

Hanbin moaned, his body squirming uncontrollably.

Jiwon released Hanbin’ hands and took Hanbin’s face in his hands, guiding him into the kiss. 

Hanbin let Jiwon take the lead on the kiss, but he followed his own desires and placed his hands flatly on Jiwon’s back.

He could feel his muscles moving under his palms, and he moved them down Jiwon’s back, honestly he loved the feeling of letting his hands slide over Jiwon’s wide back, feeling the muscles moving animatedly.

Hanbin’s hands now moved over Jiwon’s hips, making him gasp and separate from Hanin to look down.

Jiwon watched as Hanbin's hand slowly moved to touch his half-erect cock, it pulsed with anticipation as Hanbin’s fingers traced along the hip bone and down to the base of the dick before he assertively grabbed around the base of the shaft, forcing Jiwon to gasp loudly.

Hanbin let his closed hand travel up the length of the shaft and up to the tip, rubbing his cupped palm over the sensitive head.

Jiwon moaned, sucking on his lower lip while he continued to watch.

Hanbin could feel himself reacting, he couldn’t even remember how many times he had delved into the lust filled fantasy about what Jiwon’s cock was like, and what his face would look like when he was being touched like this.

Hanbin quickly looked up to watch Jiwon’s face, his heart jolted watching Jiwon’s face contorted in pleasure, eyes heavy lidded and filled with desire, panting and moaning.

“Touch me to…” Hanbin whispered, he could feel his dick throbbing.

Jiwon shuddered violently at Hanbin’s words.

“Shit, don’t suddenly say stuff like that, I almost came.” Jiwon complained, but he quickly complied, reaching down and grabbing Hanbin’s quivering dick. 

The two men were now jerking each other off, the water pouring down over them.

Hanbin used his free hand to lead Jiwon’s lips back to his. 

Diving back into deep kisses they continued to touch each other, stroking along the length of their cocks while trying to maintain a steady rhythm.

Moaning into the kisses, the two broke apart huffing and moaning loudly.

“I’m almost…” Jiwon grunted.

“Me t-nhg” Hanbin’s voice was strained as he couldn’t stop a moan from escaping him.

They both shuddered, taking a series of deep breaths as they came, ejaculating onto each others hands and bodies.

Hanbin peered down, he let go of Jiwon’s cock, and watched as the running water quickly washed the cum away.

Jiwon who was leaning forward and looking down, smirked as he moved his hand under running water.

“Well… that’s. Handy…” He said, out of breath.

Hanbin chuckled, leaning against the shower wall feeling a little tired.

Jiwon started laughing, whne he saw Hanbin’s confused look he tried to control it before he explained.

“We went in to gte cleaned up, but ended up basically getting more dirty.”

He laughed some more.

Hanbin chortled a little, but didn’t thinkn it was that funny.

“You done?” He asked stiffly.

“Hey, don’t go cold on me now.” Jiwon complained, grabbing Hanbin’s head, caressing his face.

He smiled at Hanbin, who started blushing and troe his gaze away.

“I’d just like to wash properly.” Hanbin said in a low voice.

“Let’s scrub each other’s backs then!” Jiwon exclaimed excitedly and grabbed the soap and sponge.

Hanbin didn’t have time to respond before Jiwon had poured a solid amount onto teh sponge.

‘Hey, don’t waste the soap!”

“It’s for two. Don’t worry.” Jiwon chirped he was all smiles as he slammed the sponge onto Hanbin’s chest and started rubbong it all over.

Hanbin grimaced, his body was still sensitive after cumming just moments ago.

“Hey, relax. I’m still…” he blushed, it was embarrassing to say it.

Jiwon ha da wicked grin on his face as he focused in on Hanbin’s nipples, rubbing on them repeatedly.

Hanbin shuddered and leaned away.

“Actually I’m good!” He yelled and somehow managed to escape past Jiwon and grabbed a towel before he ran out of the bathroom completely.

He could hear Jiwon laughing in the bathroom.

“Towles are in the cupboard.” Hanbin yelled as he wiped himself off out in the living room.

He found some clothes and put them on, and while waiting for Jiwon he found his own phone.

When he hit the button and the screen lit up, a twinge ran through him as he saw the amount of calls and texts he had received, all form Yunhyeong.

Hanbin sighed, he’d completely forgotten about Yunhyeong.

He opened some of the texts, as expected Yunhyeong was a good man.

Hanbin sat down on the sofa, rubbing the back of his head, he felt like he owed him an explanation and a proper reply to his confession.

Jiwon exited the bathroom and came towards him, he hugged Hanbin from behind.

“Hey, got any clothes?” He asked.

Hanbin got to his feet and found some clothes for him.

As Jiwon got dressed Hanbin’s phone chimed again.

Hanbin walked over and picked up the phone again, he sighed again when he saw that it was from Yunhyeong.

“What’s wrong?” Jiwon asked when he saw Hanbin’s expression.

“I feel like I owe Yunhyeong and explanation.” He sighed, but he avoid looking at Jiwon as he said it, but he could feel a slight shift as the air became a little tense.

“Why?” Jiwon hissed.

“Wy? Because he’s a really good friend and I’d like to keep it that way. If I give him my reply… if I turn him down properly, he can get over me and find new love.”

“I’m having a hard time accepting that you're so concerned with him.” Jiwon grumbled.

Hanbin looked up at Jiwon, and saw his sad face, but he felt surprised that Jiwon was giving him such an honest and vulnerable answer. 

Hanbin got to his feet, walking over to Jiwon he reached out and embraced him, wrapping his arms around the other and squeezing tightly.

Jiwon submitted to Hanbin’s touch, he swung his arms around and placed them on Hanbin’s lower back, holding him there.

“Look, I’m only gonna give him a proper reply to his confession, OK?” 

Hanbin tilted his head and leaned in, kissing Jiwon gently.

Jiwon kissed him back, pulling Hanbin close to him.

After kissing for a short while Jiwon separated from Hanbin.

He sighed deeply, bringing his hand up to caress Hanbin’s face.

“Fine.” He grumbled after a long moment of silence, stroking Hanbin’s cheek with his thumb.

Hanbin could still feel that Jiwon was reluctant, so he pushed away from him and hammered his closed fist on Jiwon’s chest a few times while staring him squarely in the face.

“Don’t worry you dummy.” He grinned at him as he said it.

He kissed Jiwon again before he went back to his phone and started typing out the text to ask Yunhyeong to met him.

Jiwon grumbled darkly as he wandered over and threw himself down on the sofa next to him.

After a moment he started touching Hanbin to bother him, showing his annoyance. 

Hanbin laughed as Jiwon kept touching him in ticklish places.

A few moments after sending the text did he get the reply.

“There, I’m gonna met him later.” He announced aloud.

Jiwon grunted to show his disapproval, but he didn’t say anything else.

“Hey, there’s still some tim. Let’s grab some food and who knows what we can do to kill time.” Hanbin said casually, turning to grin broadly at the other man sitting on the other end of the sofa.

Jiwon gave him a sideways glance, he then reached out with his hand, gesturing for Hanbin to give him his hand as well.

Hanbin reached out and together they entwined their fingers, Hanbin started looking for a place to eat while Jiwon was staring a hole into the side of Hanbin’s head.


	12. Chapter 12

Hanbin stood outside the door to the bar, he felt anxious and a twinge guilty, he had tried to use Yunhyeong as a rebound once, but luckily that was short lived.

He took a determined breath then entered the bar.

He took several steps inside and stopped, looking around for a familiar face.

“Hanbin! Over here!” Yunhyeong was waving at him from a tab;e way at the back.

Hanbin stopped by the bar to order a drink. Before he continued on towards the table.

HIs heart was beating hard in his chest, blood pounding in his ears as he walked closer.

Once he reached the table he saw that both JInhwan and Junhoe were sitting there, when he arrived JInhwan jumped to his feet.

“That’s our que.” he chirped and made his way past Hanbin.

Yunhyeong moved out from the seat to let Junhoe pass.

“Good luck.” He said to Yunhyeong, patting him on the shoulder as he left.

Yunhyeong sighed a little as he moved back in to the stall to sit down.

Hanbin sat down opposite him, and the awkward silence that ensued made the air tense.

Before Hanbin could say anything his drink arrived in front of him and he quickly thanked the bartender. 

“Look, I’m sorry about bailing. And I’m sorry for not replying and making you worry about me afterwards.”

Hanbin fell silent, his mind was racing as he tried to find the next words to say.

“Hanbin… I know you came to reject me.”

Hanbin stared at him, gaping a few times but no words would come out, he couldn’t tear his eyes away from Yunhyeong’s soft expression.

“You’re really a good guy…” Hanbin said, his voice kind of chocked. 

Yunhyeong chuckled.

“Who knows, maybe I’ll turn into a bad guy later?” 

When Hanbin looked at him, Yunhyeong had a big grin on his face.

“But I will admit, I was very worried after I got your text and especially after I went to your place and you weren’t there.”

Hanbin choked on his drink when he said it.

Yunhyeong frowned at him. 

Hanbin put his glass down on the table, he licked his lips nervously.

“Actually… I was there when you were at my place….” Hanbin admitted, wondering about the man’s reaction.

“What?” Yunhyeong looked confused as he searched Hanbin’s face for some clarity.

“As a matter of fact I was about to answer the door, but something stopped me.”

‘Wha-? What stopped you?” Yunhyeong frowned at him.

Hanbin tried to gather his scattered brain.

“Actually… Jiwon stopped me… and as a matter of fact…” Hanbin hesitated a little, twirling the glass in his hand around.

“I’ve been with Jiwon the whole time until midday today…” Hanbin put his glas down on the table. 

There was only silence, and after a what felt like half an eternity did Hanbin take a peak at Yunhyeong, and he saw that he was staring at him wide eyed with surprise. 

“You spent the night together?” Yunhyeong asked in disbelief.

“Yeah… and I also confessed…” Hanbin felt his face grow hot.

“What?! Are you for real? How? What?” Yunhyeong couldn’t forma proper sentence as he stared at Hanbin.

“Admittedly it was kinda forced… and he hasn’t said it back or anything… but I mean, I haven’t seen him this happy in years, at least not around me…”

Hanbin sighed.

“But… no offence, but Jiwon has only been a homophobic asshat every time I’ve met him.”

“I know, I’m sure he has his reasons… we haven’t actually gotten around to talking about anything yet…”

“Wait, if you were with him the whole night what the heck were you doing if you weren’t talking?”

Hanbin fell silent for a moment, absentmindedly he started rubbing his neck.

Yunhyeong scowled at him.

“He left hickeys on you in such an obvious place?” Yunhyeong sounded a little disgusted, making Hanbin shot him a sharp look.

Yunhyeong sighed again, shaking his head.

“Did you forget about his girlfriend?” 

Hanbin looked up at Yunhyeong, and the look in his eyes were clearly pained but he couldn’t say it.

Yunhyeong sighed deeply, clearly frustrated.

“Well, that’s good I suppose, and what is he going to do about it. I assume he’s broken up with her?” Yunhyeong wasn’t saving his punches, he was jabbing at Hanbin fiercely.

“Do you have to be so mean about it?”

“Yes, until you come to your senses.”

“It’s not about coming to my senses, I just don’t wanna push it too much… he… I mean…”

“You’re worried that if you push it, he might change his mind and go back to her?” 

“You really are being a horrible person right now.”

Yunhyeong shrugged. 

“Also, it’s almost as if you have experience with this?” He narrowed his eyes at Yunhyeong.

“Well, not me, but I know some people.” Yunhyeong said while taking a sip from his drink.

Hanbin sighed deeply, he let his head sink down onto the table, burying his face into his arms while keeping himself collected.

“Why has this got to be so complicated?” Hanbin grumbled loudly into the surface of the table.

“When was life ever easy?” Yunhyeong said dramatically. 

“Well aren’t you wise beyond your years.” Hanbin grumbled darkly, peering up at Yunhyeong.

“Well, I’m a little hurt you know. I’ve just been rejected and now I’m here listening to your troubles to learn that the man who has your heart hasn’t even called it quits with his girlfriend. You know that he’s technically cheating on her, right? Have you considered that he might be liable to cheat on you too.”

Hanbin couldn’t retort, he was surprised by Yunhyeong’s harshness and his hard punches.

“How do you know he isn’t going to keep on seeing her while telling you he isn’t? I’ve met many who have told such lies while continuing to see the women they’ve supposedly broke up with. They do it to save their image and to hide their true selves.”

Hanbin could feel Yunhyeong’s words hitting him like a ton of bricks, his heart sinking and his stomach felt like a dark hole. 

He could feel his insecurities welling up.

He would be lying if he said he hadn't thought about it, in fact he had experienced it before, but he so desperately wanted to believe in Jiwon.

He felt the tears well up, his eyes becoming hot and throbbing slightly.

“I wanted this to be a nice conversation. Wy do you have to. Be like this?!” Hanbin yelled, attracting the attention of other people.

Yunhyeong felt a little panicked as he stood up slightly, holding his hands up to stop Hanbin.

“Hanbin, relax!” He hissed sitting back down while keeping his arms outstretched. 

Hanbin fixed Yunhyeong with a glare and slammed his clenched fists onto the table.

“Relax? You’re telling me to relax after throwing a shitload in my face!?!?” Hanbin couldn’t stop himself from yelling, he was pissed. 

Too angry to stay or even look at Yunhyeong, Hanbin got to his feet and stormed out of the bar.

Yunhyeong quickly followed him, he kept trying to talk to him, but Hanbin’s ears were ringing.

In an attempt to get away from Yunhyeong he started towards the street, but was violently yanked back so hard that he fell on top of Yunhyeong who had grabbed him as he was about to walk straight into traffic.

Yunhyeong was clutching at him with trembling hands.

“Let go!” Hanbin yelled and pulled himself free from Yunhyeong’s grip.

“You could’ve been killed you fuckign idiot!!” Yunhyeong yelled, his eyes filled with terror as he coudn’t get up right away.

“Whatever!” Hanbin yelled, his voice cracked as he yelled, but he didn’t care, all he wanted was to get away.

“I only wanted you to think about the consequences! To be rational!” Yunhyeong exclaimed while forcing himself to get up.

“I don’t want to think about the consequences! I don't’ want to be rational. It’s not like every relationship is meant to last, and if that’s the case then so be it!” Hanbin yelled, he couldn't stop the tears anymore, speaking his mind was like thrusting a knife into his own chest.

He hunkered down, clutching at his knees, sobbing hard.

Yunhyeong didn’t know what to say, he felt bad about taking his frustration. out on Hanbin, even if he was a part of what was making him frustrated.

“Look, I’m sorry. I’ll take you home. It’s still early so we can take the subway.” Yunhyeong came to Hanbin and took his arm to pull him up.

Hanbin got to his feet, tears were still running down his face, but he didn't make a single sound as he let Yunhyeong lead him.

The entire subway ride was filled with an awkward silence, they had to stand because the cart was almost full.

Once they arrived at Hanbin’s station they exited together.

Hanbin who had become tired while standing was being supported by Yunhyeong as they walked slowly along the road towards Hanbin’s apartment.

When they came upon the landing Yunhyeong guided Hanbin to his door and started prompting him to punch in the code to open the door.

Just as the door opened someone came walking towards them. 

Yunhyeong glanced to the side and felt his stomach drop to the floor.

Jiwon was surprised at first, but suddenly is eyes narrowed with rage as he stormed at them, pulling Hanbin away from Yunhyeong.

Hanbin who seemed to be jerked out of his tired mind looked up at Jiwon, he saw the anger in his eyes as he glared at Yunhyeong.

He kept looking at Jiwon, that’s when he noticed that his cheek was swollen and a little red.

Hanbin automatically reached up and caressed Jiwon’s cheek.

“Are you alright? What happened?”

But Jiwon didn’t answer, he was to busy glaring at Yunhyeong.

“What the hell did you do to him?!” He barked menacingly.

“What did I do? I tried to warn him against trusting you too much!” Yunhyeong hissed back.

“Stay out of our business you snake!” Jiwon snarled, and without waiting for Yunhyeong to answer he turned on the spot and marched off, dragging Hanbin with him.

“Jiwon, wait!” Hanbin tried to stop him, but Jiwon walked determinedly away from Hanbin’s apartment building and towards a larger road where he hailed a cab.

He pushed hanbin in first and once inside Jiwon gave the drivera spot close to his home address.

Hanbin still felt a little out of it, too many things were happening in a short amount of time that his mind couldn’t keep up.

The whole cab drive there neither of them said anything, but even with the 20 minutes of silence Hanbin still wasn’t able to clear his mind.

When they arrived at their destination Jiwon grabbed Hanbin’s upper arm and forced him up and out of the car.

Once outside he went to the driver and paid while Hanbin stood and waited, still in a daze.

They stood there until the cab was gone, Jiwon then came up close to Hanbin, grabbing his hand and pulling him along.

Hanbin looked down at their hands, he looked around and while there wasn’t anyone around, it was still a little embarrassing.

Jiwon walked with brisk steps pulling Hanbin along until they reached his door and he started punching in the code.

Hanbin looked around, he hadn’t really been there as much so he wasn’t super familiar with Jiwon’s place, but the moment the door opened and he was pushed inside the scent and overall arrangement inside was definitely the work of Jiwon.

Jiwon came in after him and closed the door, he didn’t even kick off his shoes before he lunged onto Hanbin from behind, clinging to him.

The back hug took Hanbin by surprise, but an odd sense of calm spread inside him, suddenly his mind cleared and he couldn't think about anything at all, instinctively he reached up and clutched at Jiwon’s arms.

They stood like that for awhile, their heartbeats and breathing seemed to synchronize, further strengthening Hanbin’s sense of calm.

If anything about what had happened in the last 48 hours nothing had made him feel more connected to Jiwon than this moment, there was a genuine feeling of love and his heart swelled and his chest felt warm and fuzzy.

Jiwon took a deep breath in through his nose, filling his nostrils with Hanbin’s scent.

He touched his lips to Hanbin’s exposed neck, holding them there.

Hanbin's neck was a little cool rom the night air, but Jiwon parted his lips slightly before he started kissing Hanbin’s neck repeatedly.

Hanbin moaned and tilted his head to the side to allow him access, Jiwon’s heavy breathing tingling on his skin.

Hanbin reached up and slid his fingers into Jiwon’s hair, caressing him while simultaneously pulling Jiwon towards himself.

Jiwon goraned, he let his hands caress Hanbin’s stomach, sliding them over the fabric of Hanbin’s clothes.

His hand traveled upwards, his fingers digging into the skin through the fabric as he reached Hanbin’s chest.

Jiwon groped Hanbin’s chest, squeezing and stroking his small pecks searching for his nipples as he rubbed all over with his fingertips. 

He used his fingernails and scraped it across Hanbin’s nipple, making him shudder and groan.

Hanbin turned his head, he could just make eye contact with jiwon as he tried to kiss him, but the angle made it awkward

Hanbin started to turn his entire body and Jiwon opened his arms to allow it, quickly embracing Hanbin as they were standing face to face. 

They lingered for a moment, their lips only a few centimeters apart, their heavy breaths bouncing off of each others skin, their cheeks flushed and eyes locked.

Hanbin wrapped his arms around Jiwon’s waist, his fingers gently tugging on his shirt as he sucked on his lips in anticipation.

Jiwon tilted his head to the side so that their noses wouldn’t collide as he went in for the first kiss; it was a light and childish peck, which was over almost as soon as their lips connected.

Hanbin felt a little annoyed, which Jiwon noticed, it made him smile as he parted his lips as he came back in, taking Habin’s puffy lower lip into his mouth and sucking on it as he pulled back again, taking Hanabi's lip with him.

Hanbin groaned, he was growing more and more impatient by how slow Jiwon was taking so he reached u and grabbed his head, smashing their faces together and kissing him almost violently.

Jiwon was slightly taken aback, so he stumbled backwards, his back crashing into the door behind him.

Hanbin moaned, his heart was pounding hard in his chest and in his ears.

He wasted no time and quickly shoved his tongue into Jiwon’s mouth, his hands still running through Jiwon’s hair, keeping him in place as he let his tongue run rampant inside Jiwon’s mouth.

Jiwon slid his hands down Hanbin’s waist and up under his shirt, pulling it up as his hands made their way back up Hanbin’s body.

Feeling the shirt come to a halt under his arms Hanbin broke the kiss and raised his arms above his head to allow the shirt to come off.

Once he’d pulled the shirt clear he dropped it to the ground, he then forced Hanbin back, pushing him as he walked.

Worried that Hanbin might fall he turned him around and lead him into the apartment.

He rushed Hanbin in, leading him to a door on the right off of the living room.

Jiwon opened it and pushed him inside the dark room, he then grabbed Hanbin again, turning him around and kissing him fiercely. 

He walked forward again, pushing Hanbin backwards.

Hanbin got a shock as his legs hit something low which caused him to fall, a low grunt escaped him when he hit the mattress of Jiwon’s bed.

Jiwon stooped down engaging the kiss yet again, he pulled back to rmove his own shirt, tossing it violently as he couldn’t wait to get back to Hanbin who was laying on his bed, half naked, it was something he’d only dreamed about before.

He sat up to straddle Hanbin’s waist, he traced his hand from Hanbin’s chest and down his stomach, feeling the abdominal muscles twitching under his fingers as he went.

He stopped at the top of Hanbin’s pants, he let his hand trace along the top of them, making Hanbin shudder visibly.

Jiwon gulped as he unbuttoned Hanbin’s pants, pulling them down with Hanbin’s help, who raised his hips to get the pants off.

Hanbin then reached for Jiwon’s pants, he undid them and pulled them down without hesitation.

‘You’re always more aggressive than I expect you to be…” Jiwon wheezed breathlessly.

Hanbin smirked.

“I’m not as innocent as you think I am, Jiwon.”

He slid his fingers into Jiwon’s underwear and exposed his erect cock.

Jiwon shuddered as the fabric brushed against his dick, he licked his lips and reached down, grabbing his dick by the shaft and stroking it, slowly up and down while checking Hanbin out.

Hanbin smirked again, and reached down to rub his own hard cock through his underwear.

Jiwon watched the outline of the erect member, and watched as Hanbin stroked the length of his own dick with the palm of his hand, slowly, reaching down to grab his balls, playing with it in his hand.

Jiwon moaned deep down in his throat while he continued to stroke the length of his dick, rubbing a few extra times at the head.

Hanbin reached up with his free hand to touch Jiwon’s cheek, in the dim light coming through the window Hanbin could faintly see how it was still a little swollen and red.

He traced his fingers over the swelling, fixing Jiwon with a concerned look.

But Jiwon simply turned his head and kissed Hanbin’s fingers instead, opening his mouth and taking them in, he nibbled on his fingers and sucked on them a few times making Hanbin shudder.

Hanbin hurriedly yanked his underwear down, pre-cum dribbling from the tip appearing as he exposed himself. 

He hungrily grabbed his own dick firmly, rubbing it up and down with determined strokes.

Jiwon’s eyes widened with hungry desire, his cock throbbing in his hands,

Hanbin licked his lips, he swallowed hard before he grabbed at Jiwon’s thighs, he pulled hard on him, sliding down the bed himself while Jiwon came closer.

Hanbin reached up and touched JIwon’s cock, he heard Jiwon gasp loudly, and gazed up and behind him to see Jiwon’s eyes, open wide and completely wild, staring at him.

Jiwon repositioned himself, lowering his hips slightly until his cock was dangling close to Hanbin’s mouth, his breath bated as he waited almost holding his breath in anticipation. 

Hanbin took the cock to his lips sliding it across them as he perked them up, he started by kissing the head with his lips.

Jiwon groaned, his entire frame trembling as he hovered over Hanbin who parted his lips and took the head into his mouth, making Jiwon gasp.

Jiwon took as much of Jiwon’s cock into his mouth as possible, feeling the hot rod pierce his throat and sink into him, with Jiwon’s trembling hips slowly lowering onto him.

Hanbin sucked as best he could but from Jiwon’s growing and uncontrollable moaning he seemed close to cumming.

“Shit, I can- I can’t hold it! I’m cu~” His voice trailed off with a loud shuddering moan as he came in Hanbin’s throat.

He was doing his best to not shake his hips, but his strength was about to give out so he forced himself up right, looking down at Hanbin who expertly let Jiwon’s cock slide out of his mouth. 

Jiwon collapsed onto his side and lay there panting hard. 

Hanbin wriggled his way up to lie next to Jiwon.

Hanbin wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, laying down next to Jiwon who opened heavy eyes.

“Shit…” He wheezed, reaching out for Hanbin and caressing his cheek.

Jiwon gazed down Hanbin’s body, looking at his still fully erect cock.

Wordlessly he reached down, grabbing Hanbin’s cock.

He watched Hanbin’s face as he took the grip, saw his jaw tighten and the jolt that rocked through his body as he was touched.

Hanbin sucked on his lower lip, his body jerking as Jiwon started to move his hand up the shaft.

Their eyes locked on each other Jiwon continued to stimulate Hanbin, watching the pleasure as it was being swept across Hanbin’s face.

Jiwon started moving his hand faster, and he moved in to kiss Hanbin.

While they were kissing, Jiwon could feel Hanbin’s body jolting several times as he rubbed his hard cock eagerly.

Hanbin’s moans were erupting from him uncontrollably, Jiwon moved his kisses to trace along Hanbin’s jawline, and down to his ear and neck, sucking a little on his earlobe before moving down his neck playfully just as Hanbin reached climax in Jiwon’s hand.

His load flew up his chest, making a mess of him as his body twitched and jolted violently a few times, he was breathing heavily, but he tried to stifle them as best he could.

Hanbin looked at Jiwon, only tilting his head slightly to the side to see him.

With his chest still heaving, Jiwon could see Hanbin’s skin gleaming with swat from the dim light.

Jiwon inched closer, reaching up and cupping the side of Hanbin’s ace in his hand as he pulled him in to kiss him.

Hanbin moaned, his body still sensitive to touch. 

Jiwon kissed him gently, caressing Hanbin's cheek with his thumb.

After kissing Hanbin many times, sucking on his lips and after feeling Hanbin calm down a little more did Jiwon shift.

He moved to hover over Hanbin, biting his lip as he leaned down to kiss him again.

Hanbin reached up and wrapped his arms around Jiwon’s shoulders and neck, kissing him back.

Jiwon let his body fall, letting his weight lay on Hanbin’s body.

Hanbin groaned a little.

“You’re heavy…” he grumbled, letting his hands travel down Jiwon’s sweaty back.

“Oh, you don’t hate it…” Jiwon said and playfully kissed Hanbin’s nose.

“Stop that.” Hanbin chuckled.

“What? You’re nose is cute…” Jiwon smiled broadly.

He kissed it again.

“Idiot.” Hanbin pinched Jiwon’s shide making him squirm.

They both laughed a little.

Jiwon looked at Hanbin, his heart swelled with the happiness he’d been denying himself for years.

His entire body felt tingly and hot, and as he looked at Hanbin’s eyes, filled with love and desire, every feature that he could see in the low light precious to him as he reached up and yet again caressed his face.

The words seemed to travel faster than his beating heart, faster than his mind was capable of processing and yet his throat clenched tight.

“Hanbin, I- I-” His words stopped in his throat, he saw Hanbin frowning at him seemingly half amused that he was suddenly unable to speak and probably because of the serious look on his face.

Hanbin reached up and touched Jiwon’s face, and Jiwon closed his mouth, looking disappointed so he turned his face and leaned into Hanbin’s touch. 

He kissed the inside of Hanbin’s hand once locking his gaze with Hanbin.

The light suddenly switched on, they’d both been so engrossed in one another that they were basically deaf to all other sounds.

“Jiwon, we need to talk, I-” Mina stopped dead in her tracks, staring at the sight before her.

Out of shock the two men on the bed sat up, Hanbin proppign himself up on his elbows, and Jiwon sat up.

She clasped her hands in front of her mouth and bolted, and the next thing they heard was the front door opening and someone running out.

The shock paralyzed them both for a few seconds.

Hanbin sat up more fully, feeling flustered, he didn’t really know what to do.

He looked at JIwon who was still sitting on his knees, hunched over slightly.

Hanbin frowned, he reached out for Jiwon.

“Jiwon, are yo-” his fingers were only inches from Jiwon’s face when his head snapped back, staring at Hanbin with wild yet distant eyes.

He quickly reached up and slapped hanbin’s hand away.

He scurried off the bed in a panic, his feet carried him backwards and he didn’t stop until he crashed against the wall.

“Jiwon?” Hanbin felt his voice trembling.

“Go.” Jiwon sia din a low voice.

“What?” Hanbin hadn’t heard him clearly.

“You need to go.” Jiwon said loudly, his eyes darting all over in a panic.

“You need to go! Now!!” Jiwon yelled and slid down the wall, his entire body shaking violently.

WIth Jiwon yelling at him Hanbin acted on instinct following jiwon’s instruction.

He grabbed his clothes and ran out the door, he hurriedly put his clothes on, he didn’t bother putting his shoes on and simply ran out the front door.

After running for a short while, he found himself on the street in a side alley to the main road.

He collapsed against the wall sliding down to the ground, he clutched his knees to his chest as his body ached, his heart thumping hard from running and aching from being shattered into a million pieces.

He started sobbing, his entire body shaking violently. 

He had no idea of how long he’d been sitting there, he only knew that he was starting to feel cold, and he could no longer feel his toes and fingers.

He stumbled to his feet, leaning heavily on the wall as he got up.

He somehow made it home, ice cold and dirty he stepped into the shower fully dressed.

He stood under the pouring water feeling numb and his mind went completely blank.

When he woke up late the next day he didn’t remember getting out of the shower or getting in bed.

His head was throbbing painfully and his entire body ached as well.

He turned around and looked at the clock on the bedside table which told him it was noon, he frowned, turned over and covered his head with the duvet, trying to go back to sleep, hoping it would help him ignore the intense pain.


	13. Chapter 13

Hanbin had missed three days of classes, his head was still hurting him and he felt empty yet heavy at the same time.

He picked up his phone out of habit, but remembered that he'd let the battery drain and hadn’t charged it on purpose.

He sighed deeply.

He hadn’t left the apartment since that day, there were only minimal amounts of food left, not that he was hungry, but he ate almost out of habit, or to distract himself at least a little.

Hanbin took a whiff of his clothes, and he couldn't deny that they had a strong smell.

He looked at the clock on the wall and figured he’d go to the convenience store at least, if he felt like it perhaps he could make it to the supermarket.

He changed his clothes, wrapping a hoodie around himself just in case.

Hanbin made his way out the door, breathing slowly as he stood outside the door.

He forced himself to take a step forward and then another, his head was still aching, but he forced himself to move.

He somehow managed to make it to the supermarket, he bought a bunch of stuff and let the pain of carrying the heavy bags home overwrite the pain inside.

When he arrived back home and made it just inside the door, he heard it shut and autolock, he then let the bags drop from his hands, and he stood there to feel the pain leftover from holding the bags.

He left the bags by the door and walked inside.

He walked into the kitchen as he felt thirsty, he grabbed a glass off the counter, rinsed it once before filling it until it spilled, then bringing it to his mouth and chugging it down.

It made his throat hurt, but he didn't care.

He leaned back against the kitchen counter and sighed deeply, his chest ached and his headache was getting worse as he tried not to think about anything.

The doorbell rang suddenly and he stood in the kitchen, feeling the dread fill him as he didn’t know who was out there.

A moment later he heard the door open and his mother's voice calling for him.

Her voice slightly panicky as she barged into the apartment.

She peered into the kitchen and saw him standing there.

“Hanbin!” She dropped everything she was holding and came towards him.

“You silly child, what are you up to?!” She hugged him fiercely.

“Relax, I’m not dead.” Hanbin grumbled in a low voice.

“Well, when I can’t get through on your phone no matter how many times or what time of the day I try…” her voice sounded somewhat choked as if she was trying to hold tears back.

She leaned back to look at him.

“You look terrible!” She almost yelled, gripping his shoulders tightly.

“Ouch.” Hanbin complained, lowering his head, it's not like he was completely blind, he knew he looked awful.

She sighed and let go of him.

“Please keep your phone charged before I’m the one that passes away.” She complained, taking a step back and picking up the things she’d dropped on the floor

“Oh, and look who I bumped into on the way here.” She started, and Hanbin’s heart sank rapidly.

“When I told him why I was coming he was also worried about you so I brought him along.”

Hanbin felt his soul threatening to leave his body, and he waited with bated breath.

“Honestly, it’s been too long, Donghyuk.” She peered around the corner into the hall, and when she turned back into the kitchen a young man appeared. 

Donghyuk beamed at him as always, his eyes always had a spark to them.

“Yo, it’s been a while… you really do look like shit!”

“Thanks…” Hanbin sighed darkly, he tried to glare at hi, but he couldn’t muster the energy.

“Hey, Mrs. Kim, I’ll take care of the zombie here, you can head on home.” Donghyuk placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder, he’d always had that effect on people.

Hanbin looked at his mother’s face, he could see her relax a little, her eyes softened from their previous somewhat erratic look. 

“Really? Oh, you’re a godsend. This means I can pick up your sister early.” She smiled a little. 

She turned around to look at her son again, he leaned back slightly as she came at him with new determination.

“Now, sweetheart, charge your phone. Pick up when I call. Take care of yourself.”  
She touched his face.

“Start by shaving…” she frowned before continuing.

“I’ll leave you in your friends care, but don’t hesitate to call me. Also, answer when I call.” She hugged him, then started for the door, she patted Donghyuk’s shoulder as she passed.

“Thank you” she said and smiled at him, then she left.

Hanbin leaned against the kitchen counter while Donghyuk started clearing away the things his mother had brought.

Once Donghyuk started pulling out the homemade food to put them in the fridge, Hanbin felt his stomach growling.

“Well, well. Mind if I poke around?” Donghyuk smirked at him, taunting him slightly.

Hanbin shook his head and watched as Donghyuk found a plate and started putting food on it.

He fixed up a whole meal and walked into the living room.

“If you don’t get your butt out here I’m gonna eat it.” Donghyuk called.

Hanbin forced himself to move, he went inot the living room and sat down next to Donghyuk who immediately grabbed the remote and turned the TV on.

Hanbin ate in peace as Donghyuk watched TV, he was greatful that Donghyk had such great sense.

Only when Hanbin was done eating did Donghyuk start speaking.

“So, wanna tell me why you’re down in the dumps?”

“Not really…” Hanbin grumbled having new found energy.

“When did you get here?” He asked Donghyuk, looking at him.

“Last week.” He didn’t look away from the TV.

“What are you doing here then? Don’t you have your own classes and lectures to attend?”

“I took leave.” He said shortly.

“Why?”

“Why don’t we talk about you instead?” Donghyuk’s reply had a nasty after taste to it.

“No reason to be so cranky. I'm happy you’re here.”

“Sorry, but that sounds less than convincing.” 

“Well, I got some shit of my own… so…”

“Wanna tell me about it, maybe it’ll help if you get to talk about it?” 

Hanbin sighed.

Perhaps it wasn’t such a bad idea, after all Donghyuk knew about his crush on Jiwon, he was bi so he wouldn’t judge, probably.

Hanbin sighed again, Donghyuk waited.

“Uh… are you seeing someone right now?” 

“No. Why? Are you?”

Hanbin hesitated, he really didn’t know how to define it, also what was the current status anyway.

“I… I’m not sure?” He quickly glanced sideways to see Donghyuk’s reaction.

Donghyuk was frowning, giving him a confused look.

“I”m not following.” He said.

“You remember how I’ve had this unrequited lo-”

“For Jiwon, yes. What about it?” Donghyuk sounded suspicious.

“Well…” Hanbin hesitated.

“I you're about to tell me he’s getting married and that’s why your down in the dumps then-!”

“No. No!” Hanbin sat up straight and faced Donghyuk who was he could tell was about to give him some medicine called life if he had to.

“I don’t know what to tell you. Honestly, everything’s so messed up!”

“Now, I’m really not following.” Donghyuk had turned towards him and was staring him down.

Hanbin didn’t know how to explain what was going on with him and Jiwon, even if he’d had no problems speaking to Yunhyeong about it, Yunhyeong had a different relation to him and to Jiwon than Donghyuk.

Donghyuk moved closer to Hanbin who was wracking his brain trying to find the best way to tell him what was going on.

Donghyuk suddenly moved even closer, reaching out and hooking his fingers into the collar of Hanbin’s hoodie.

“Who gave you these?” Donghyuk asked slowly.

Hanbin kept gazing forward as he took a deep breath before he spoke. 

“Hanbin, who gave you these hickeys?’ His voice was filled with suspicion and worry.

Hanbin gave him a sideways glance.

“Jiwon.”

Donghyuk let go of Hanbin, his eyes wide in shock.

“Was he drunk?” 

“No.”

“Was he on drugs?!”

“No!”

Donghyuk stared at him, wordlessly gaping, his mouth opening and closing as if trying to say something.

After a short silence he found his voice again.

“Are you in a relationship?” His voice was filled with doubt.

Hanbin’s heart squeezed painfully, his chest felt stuffy all of a sudden..

“I… I don’t know.” He could feel his eyes growing hot, tears pressing on his eyes.

“What the fuck. I’m gone for a year and you two! How did this even happen?” Donghyuk was waving his arms around frantically.

“Actually, I don’t have a single clue.” Hanbin confessed, his voice trembling slightly.

“What?” Donghyuk was confused yet again.

“Wait, so did he confess to you?” Donghyuk pressed on, determined to dig up the whole story.

“No, I confessed, sorta in the heat of the moment? But he seemed really happy and relieved about it, at the time he thought I was starting a relationship with someone else.”

“Were you?”

“No.” Hanbin shook his head and sighed deeply.

Donghyuk sat back and sighed as well.

“So what happened?”

“It’s so messed up. I was actually going to give up…” Hanbin laughed bitterly at his own words thinking about his resolution that time.

“He introduced me to this girl, it seemed pretty serious and it hurt so much.” He sniffled a little, bringing his hands up to his face and rubbing it hard.

“Wait he was dating a girl and then forced a confession out of you because he thought you were seeing someone? That’s fucked up, you do realize that right. Are you even sure he likes you back?”

“I think so… I thought so… I mean from the way he’s been acting around me, his reactions and behaviour… why would he be like that if he didn’t actually like me?”

“Did he break up with that girl?”

“I… don’t know…”

“How can you not know, didn’t you talk about it.”

“Honestly, the last time we were together his cheek was red and swollen, i wanted to believe that she’d done that, but we never got around to talking about it…”

“Why? What happened?” 

“Well, that day when his cheek was red, I’d gone drinking with the guy he thought I was starting a relationship with, so he brought me to his place and things started getting… serious, but suddenly she showed up, while we were… on the bed… and he, like, paniced or something, completely shut down. He told me to leave. He seemed totally freaked.”

As he told Donghyuk the story his heart throbbed painfully, the image of Jiwon’s face became all to clear inside his head.

“This is seriously so fucked up.” Donghyuk said earnestly.

“I don’t blame you honestly, but you can’t stay cooped up in here forever and you have to go back to school even of he’s there.”

Donghyuk’s words were true, at least he couldn’t find any way to dismiss them. 

“You sound so wise.” Hanbin said in a choked up voice.

“Well, I’ve dated my fair share of insecure and closeted men.”

Hanbin’s head turned so sharply that it sent a sharp stab of pain running through his neck.

“What's with the shocked look. I’ve been watching you two for so long, I saw the way Jiwon would occasionally look at other men in moments when he thought no one was watching. Also how he kept oher’s away from you. How he was with the girls he dated…there were so many things...”

Hanbin stared at Donghyuk in shocked silence.

“But you know, seeing him as he was, I never in my wildest dreams would've thought he’d actually fess up and go for it…” Donghyuk said as if wondering aloud.

“But for real, you should have a proper talk with him.”

Hanbin sighed.

“I don’t think I’m ready.” Hanbin sighed.

“Do you want to go on feeling like this for much longer? Isn't it better to get it over with, regardless of the outcome?”

Hanbin gave a single shuddering sobb.

He suddenly got to his feet, he disappeared into his bedroom and came back with his phone and the charger.

Hanbin plugged it in and watched as the screen lit up, showing the charging symbol.

He walked back to the couch, slumping down in the same spot from before.

“And so we wait.” Donghyuk said darkly, it made Hanbin chuckle.

“What do you think will be on it when you turn it on?” Donghyuk looked at Hanbin,doing his best to prepare Hanbin for whatever was ahead.

“I don’t know, maybe there won’t be anything…”

“I seriously doubt that, but if that is the case I’ll kill him for you.” Donghyuk looked earnest as he said it, making Hanbin chuckle again.

Hanbin got to his feet and picked his phone up, he turned it on while holding his breath. 

He entered the pin and watched as the phone screen lit up and showed the logo.

Before the phone’s home screen appeared the phone started vibrating nonstop. 

Feeling a little relieved he saw that there were plenty of texts and calls, both from Jiwon and also from Yunhyeong.

Hanbin, who’d been sitting down, standing on the balls of his feet slumped sideways in relief, his chest felt stuffy still, but he was happy to see that Jiwon wasn’t pretending that nothing had happened between them.

He started reading some of the text, all of them were short, and most of them were him apologizing and asking him to please call him back.

The image of Jiwon’s panicked face flooded his mind yet again, was he really ready for this?

“Hey, don’t stress, he can wait a few more minutes. Why don’t you go take a shower? Cuz you like, really need it.”

Hanbin sighed, he put the phone back down and got to his feet, he walked to the bathroom with slow steps as he tried to sort out his thoughts.

After a few minutes he came back feeling refreshed.

He pulled the charger cord out of the phone and sat down on the sofa withit.

Donghyuk was channel surfing next to him as he waited.

“What should I say?” Hanbin asked, feeling nervousness grip his heart.

“Well, I don’t know what you need to talk about, just that you need to talk.” Donghyuk didn’t look away from the screen as he spoke.

Hanbin looked at the unread text from Yunhyeong, he saw Jiwon’s name in it and opened the text.

[“Hey, Jiwon came and asked about you. He looked like The dead. I don’t know what happened between you two after that night, but seeing him now and since you haven’t been here at all, something probably happened right? Well, I’m here if you want to talk.”] 

Hanbin brought his hand to the back of his head and scratched at it, ruffling through his wet hair.

“What?” Donghyuk asked suddenly.

“Oh, it’s form a guy in my class… actually the guy that Jiwon thought I was starting a relationship with… we’re friends, he’d a good guy. Says that Jiwon looks like the dead and was asking about me.”

“Well doesn't that sound encouraging?” Donghyuk smirked at him.

“Shut up.” Hanbin complained in a low voice, making Donghyuk chuckle returning his focus to the TV.

Hanbin sighed deeply, leaning back into the sofa as he started typing something, which he deleted a moment later.

After many tries he’d managed to write something that was straight to the point and somewhat void of emotion, saying that they needed to talk this out.

He sent the text while closing his eyes, his hands gripping the phone tightly, and it wasn’t long until his phone vibrated in his hand.

He barely opened his eyes as he peeked at the screen with one eye slightly open, almost afraid to see the reply.

Yet again he apologized, Hanbin could feel the desperation as he agreed to meet him and suggested many places and ended with giving Hanbin the choice of when and where.

‘He wants to meet, as soon as possible.” Hanbin said out loud.

“Well choose a place that’ll work for you then.” Donghyuk said.

Hanbin took a deep breath and sent his reply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, dear readers!
> 
> Sorry about the delay, crazy week. Next week is also a little crazy, so I hope it'll work out. 
> 
> Kinda happy I managed to sneak Donghyuk in as well, but I don't see any chance to add Chanwoo, oh well, perhaps some other time.


	14. Chapter 14

Hanbin felt anxious as he approached the door of Jiwon’s parents apartment; he still wasn't completely sure that he'd his was the best location, but he figured no one would overhear the conversation and he knew how to get out if he needed to.

He froze only a few steps form the door, his heart was beating erratically and his feet felt like they were made out of stone.

He took several deep breaths before he forced his legs to move.

He stopped again when he was right in front of the door, his hand moved automatically for the doorbell, but his trembling hand stopped mid-air. 

He swallowed hard, his hand forming into a fist he let it fall slightly, but he clutched it to his stomach. 

He’d talked it over with Donghyuk many times before coming, he’d also talked it over inside his head many more times than he could count.

Regardless of the outcome, at least he could move forward.

He took a final deep breath, and held it in as he forced his arm to move until his finger touched the doorbell. 

There seemed to be a scramble just inside the door.

Hanbin took a step back just as the door flew open with Jiwon pushing the door open and filling the entire doorway.

Hanbin was slightly taken aback, his eyes darting all over, analyzing Jiwon where he stood with a desperate look on his face.

“Ha-Hanbin…” his voice was strained and rough, he looked pale and tired.

Looking closely his face looked gaunt and there were dark circles under his eyes.

“You really look terrible.” Hanbin commented, it was the only thing that came to mind as he tried to gather himself.

“Ah, um… please come in…” Jiwon grumbled and moved aside to let Hanbin pass.

Hanbin walked past him and inside the apartment.

“Ah, your… uh… shoes… you… left them…” Jiwon’s voice trailed off and died… he frowned deeply and cleared his throat and stepped away from the hallway.

“Would you like something to drink?” He asked while keeping his gaze lowered.

“No, I’m good…” hanbin grumbled back.

There was a moment of silence. 

“Then you should come inside…” Jiwon said and walked into the apartment.

Hanbin followed him, keeping his eyes on Jiwon as he walked behind him into the apartment.

Once they were in the living room Hanbin went straight for the chair, quickly sitting down, but remaining completely silent.

Jiwon bustled about for a few moments, it seems he hadn’t anticipated for Hanbin to sit in the chair.

He looked around bewildered for a few more moments until something seemed to click in his mind and he hurriedly disappeared into the kitchen.

Moments later he returned with a kitchen chair.

Hanbin watched him all the while he came towards him, placed the chair down in front of him, but a bit away, and sat down facing him, but with his head lowered. 

Hanbin sighed loudly, making Jiwon flinch.

Watching Jiwon’s pathetic figure, he couldn’t help but feel a sense of frustration, and the kindelings of a subtle rage started to flicker inside him.

Hanbin shifted in his chair, crossing his legs, almost defensively and fixed his eyes on Jiwon.

“Should we get things started?” Hanbin asked coldly.

Jiwon flinched again.

Hanbin noticed that his hands were trembling.

Jiwon suddenly moved forward on the chair, suddenly he was on his hands and knees and lowering his head to the floor.

‘I’m sorry. I’m so-sorry about that time… when I told you to l-leave…” His voice was trembling even worse than his hands.

Hanbin said nothing, waiting for Jiwon to continu.

“I… that time… I panicked…”

“Why was she there?” Hanbin asked coldly.

“I don’t know… maybe she wanted to talk… I… I was… I had met with her… it was just before I came to your place…”

“What were you doing together with her?” 

Jiwon looked up at Hanbin, who did his best to remain unfazed.

“I was breaking up with her! She slapped me even.” 

Hanbin felt a slight twinge inside.

He was a little happy that his assumption had been right, but there was still a big, fucked up mess, that didn’t even include a girl whatsoever, that he needed to unravel. 

“Jiwon.” Hanbin said curtly.

Jiwon sat up, his hands folded in his knees, clearly anxious and stiff.

“If… if you really want to be in a serious relationship with… me.” He hesitated with his words, feeling it form a hard to swallow lump in his throat.

“You have to sort out whatever issues you have within yourself. I don’t ever want to walk on eggshells around a man who can’t be honest with himself, and who is like a ticking time bomb.”

“I know… I’m sorry.” Jiwon’s voice was strained yet again.

“You know… I… I always wanted a family… seeing how happy my parents are. My relationship with my older brother, I wanted to be a part of something just like it, since I Was young…”

“I know… how long do you think we have been friends?”

“And then… one day I noticed… I noticed that.. that…” Jiwon kept stuttering, his hands gripping at his pants and his eyes darting wildly all over.

“That you were attracted to men and thus your dream of a happy family was destroyed?” Hanbin felt annoyed by Jiwon’s flustered speaking and decided to speak his assumptions of what he was going to say.

Jiwon fell silent and stared at him, confirming what Hanbin suspected.

Jiwon’s face broke inot a bitter smile.

“You know me so well…” He brought his hand to his face and rubbed it hard, then pushing his hair back.

“I’ve known you a long time, but the Jiwon of the past few years is more of a stranger to me…”

Jiwon sighed.

He got back up and sat down on the chair, but he slouched forward, sighing yet again.

“Getting older wasn’t easy. When i was still a young teenager, despite my inclination I could still manage because my dream was so far off, but as I came closer and closer to adulthood it felt like time was running out… also…” he paused looking to the ceiling with a sad look in his eyes.

Hanbin didn’t say anything and simply waited for Jiwon to continue.

“The people around me… the ones so sure of their future, the ones with the same aspirations, the ones who had their future figured out… also people started becoming more aware of the issues of being in a relationship… it became more serious than before, and so many of my other classmates, my friends… the way the talked about gay people when there was that rumour that someone was gay… it was horrifying to listen to, and the idea of being ostracized was absolutely terrifying…”

Hanbin’s chest felt stuffy, he’d also felt the pressure in high school, but he couldn’t remember being that scared of other people’s opinions. 

“You’re parents aren’t old fashioned or narrow minded like that though…” hanbin said in a low voice, almost like a gentle reminder to just himself.

“I know… “ Jiwon sighed, it was filled with a sense of deep sadness.

“I don’t really understand it myself, why I’m so scared of other people's opinions.” Jiwon brought his hands up and buried his face in them.

Hanbin got to his feet, he walked towards Jiwon, he stopped right in front of him and simply stared at him for a moment.

He sighed, reached out and granned Jiwon’s wrists, pulling his hands away from his face to stare directly into his eyes.

“Kim Jiwon, everyone who is different from the norm and derives from the expected path are scared, but are you really going to continue lying to yourself until you’ve lived almost your whole life?”

Jiwon said nothing and just stared back at Hanbin.

“I’ve met a few people who are in their forties, their fifties and they’ve told me about how they lived up to society's expectations. It’s not that they didn’t love their wives in some way, but at some point they couldn’t keep lying to themselves. They ended up destroying the family they had created, some said that their child hates them and they haven’t spoken to them since they came out. Is that what you really want?”

Jiwon’s eyes filled with tears, and he sobbed a few times while trying to remain calm.

“No…” He cried as he said it, the tears were rolling down his cheeks.

Hanbin let go of his arms and watched as Jiwon started wiping his tears away. 

Hanbin sighed and grabbed Jiwon’s arm yet again, pulling on him to get up.

Jiwon simply followed and Hanbin lead them to the sofa. 

“Jiwon, if you’re really serious about me… and about us, then you need to put in the effort to get over this issue, your insecurities and all the things that are holding you back from moving forward with your true self.”

Hanbin entwined his fingers with Jiwon and squeezed his hand.

JIwon’s trembling eyes were locked on him.

“There will be people who will be horrible to you, but just remember that there are also people who don’t. People who change when you tell them may not be the people you want in your life, but you will have friends who aren’t part of the community but who will stand by your side regardless and who will defend you when you encounter people who don’t accept you.”

Jiwon simply nodded, but he was unable to find his voice.

“Jiwon, I”ve loved you for a long time. Seeing you with a girl, this time I was about to give up on you… but you pulled me back, and I want to move forward with us. But I can’t move forward and be with someone who can’t even be honest with himself.”

Jiwon blinked several times, his gaze locking fiercely with Hanbin, and his free hand flew up to grab his shoulder.

“I love you, Kim Hanbin. I’ve loved you for many years, though I have been living in denial for just as long. I’m not sure of how to prove my sincerity, but I really want to be with you. I can see that my behaviour over the past weeks has been really bad, I’ve been a major asshole to you and your friends.”

Jiwon had stopped blinking and he was speaking with determination.

Hanbin felt his heart swell, it was the first time Jiwon had told him that: the words “I love you” floated around in his mind, filling every corner he was engulfed by a warm, fuzzy feeling. 

“I’m going to try hard from now on to rid myself of my fears and love you proudly and honestly.”

“I'm incredibly happy to hear that…” Hanbin breathed, relieved at his words he started shedding tears.

Seeing Hanbin’s tears rolling gently down his cheeks, Jiwon’s face scrunched up as he also started to cry.

Jiwon was the one who reached around and grabbed Hanbin, pulling him into a firm embrace. 

Hanbin felt relieved, a lot of the stress fro the past few weeks seemed to finally let go as he sank into Jiwon’s arms.

He wrapped his arms around Jiwon as well, returning the hug as he snuggled his face into the nook of Jiwon’s neck. 

Jiwon turned his head slightly, and awkwardly pressed his lips to the top of Hanbin’s head. 

Hanbin chuckled a little, untangling himself from Jiwon to gently press his lips to Jiwon’s forehead.

He leaned back to see Jiwon smiling gently at him, he moved his arm to push Hanbin’s hair aside and continued to move along the side of his face until his fingers reached Hanbin’s chin.

Jiwon grabbed Hanbin’s chin and forced him to tilt his head to the side before he dived in and pressed his lips to Hanbin’s.

He continued to place soft kisses on Hanbin’s lips, not deepening them more than occasionally sucking on his lips.

It was like Jiwon was saying “I love you” with every kiss, and Hanbin could feel his face grow hot and every inch of his body seemed to tingle with electricity running from his core and out to the very tip of every limb.

Hanbin leaned into Jiwon, his hands clutching at the clothes on his back, fingers digging into the fabric.

Jiwon pulled away slightly to catch his breath.

Hanbin looked at him with a warm gaze in his eyes.

“Jiwon, I love you.” He said, his voice a little hoarse, making him chuckle, making him if possible even more embarrassed. 

They both started laughing, but quickly continued while alternating between hugging and kissing.


	15. Chapter 15

After they’d calmed down they had left Jiwon’s parents and gone out to eat, and then returned to Jiwon’s apartment. 

They had both washed up together in a light hearted mood, joking and spraying each other with water.

Afterwards they’d gone to bed and fallen asleep while spooning and holding hands.

Hanbin had woken up first and dislodged himself from Jiwon to look at his sleeping face.

Jiwon still looked tired, even if he seemed less stressed over all.

Hanbin reached up and touched his face, as he stroked his fingertips across Jiwon’s cheek he stirred and opened his eyes.

When Jiwon saw Hanbin looking at him, his cheeks slightly flushed with embarrassment, a big sheepish grin spread across his face.

Jiwon reached up and moved in, hugging Hanbin, rubbing his scruff on Hanbin’s shoulder, scratching his exposed neck.

“Ouch!” Hanbin exclaimed.

Jiwon chortled, his body vibrating a little.

“Sorry. I’m just so glad!” Jiwon said warmly in his rough morning voice.

Hanbin couldn’t stop himself from smiling, and instead he turned to lay on his side as well.

Now face to face the two stared at each other, their eyes darting all over the others face while trying not to smile too widely. 

Hanbin took the initiative and dived forth, pressing his lips to Jiwon’s in a quick peck.

“We should probably brush our teeth first…” Jiwon suggested, his lips curling into a smirk.

“You’re probably right…” Hanbin grumbled, pouting a little and he grabbed Jiwon’s arm and massaged it slightly, feeling like he wanted to cling to Jiwon constantly.

Jiwon’s eyes widened slightly, his heart started picking up pace and power, beating hard in his chest.

Jiwon reached up and grabbed Hanbin’s shoulder, pushing him down and climbing on top of him and greedily devouring his lips.

Flustered, Hanbin only lay there receiving the kiss, but after a few moments, he was able to return the kiss, wrapping his hands around Jiwon’s neck.

They broke apart for a moment to catch their breath.

“Weren’t we gonna brush our teeth first?” Hanbin asked, his flushed cheek and heavy eyes looking at Jiwon.

“You were too cute, I couldn’t stop myself.” Jiwon wheezed and leaned down to kiss the tip of Hanbin’s nose.

“Aish, that’s embarrassing you dummy!” Hanbin formed his hand into a fist and lightly hit Jiwon’s shoulder.

Jiwon laughed, everything Hanbin did was cute.

“Alright, alright.” Jiwon chortled and got up, leaving the bed while pulling Hanbin along by his wrist.

They quickly brushed their teeth, joking all the while: Jiwon came up behind Hanbin, hugging him from behind and kissing his cheek.

“Hey, do you want any breakfast?” Jiwon asked while continuing to hug Hanbin.

“Sure, order in?” Hanbin leaned back against Jiwon.

“Hm… we could. How about I check the fridge first?”

“OK.” Hanbin laughed a little at the thought that they might be cooking a meal together, and imaging it in his mind made his chest feel warm and fuzzy.

“What are you smiling about?” Jiwon asked, grinning himself.

Hanbin didn’t reply, he simply turned is head and kissed Jiwon, missing his mouth by a bit so he kissed the corner of his mouth.

Jiwon grinned broadly and turned his head to accommodate Hanbin, kissing him back softly and slowly.

Hanbin turned around, and he was instantly pushed against the sink by Jiwon who wasted no time in deepening the kiss between them.

The atmosphere was interrupted by the loud sound of Hanbin’s stomach growling.

Hanbin turned bright red while Jiwon tried to stifle his laughter.

“Let’s get some food in you.” Jiwon said in between stifled laughs.

Hanbin didn’t say anything while wishing his face would stop feeling so hot.

Jiwon lead the way to the kitchen and directed Hanbin to sit down while he walked over to the fridge.

After a peering inside he looked at Hanbin.

“Well, there isn’t really anything in here…” Jiwon scratched the back of his hand, feeling embarrassed at the state of his fridge.

“Let’s just order some food then… or do you wanna go out? Suppose we could also head to the supermarket and buy some stuff as well…” Hanbin voice his thoughts to Jiwon who seemed to think about his suggestions.

“I’m good with anything really..” he grumbled looking at Hanbin.

“Me, too…” 

“There’s nothing you really want to eat?”

“Are there any good places that deliver quickly around here?”

“Yeah, should I just order a bunch of things?”

‘Sure.” Hanbin grinned at Jiwon’s fussing.

He watched as Jiwon made the call and ordered.

“When will it be delivered?” He asked when Jiwon hung up.

“In about 30 minutes, wanna watch some TV or something?” Jiwon asked innocently.

“Yeah.” 

Hanbin got up and walked into the living room, he plopped down on the sofa and waited for Jiwon to arrived.

Jiwon turned on the TV before sitting down, Hanbin looked at him, frowning slightly because there was a gap between them.

Hanbin moved determinedly, huddling up next to Jiwon.

He felt Jiwon freeze so he looked up at Jiwon’s face, but what he saw made him giggle.

Jiwon’s face was growing redder by the second, his face was hilarious as he tried to keep his composure.

Jiwon brought his hand to his face and covered his eyes.

“You’re really unfair… I was trying to restrain myself here.” Jiwon grumbled.

Hanbin chuckled, shifting until he could move up and kiss Jiwon’s cheek.

His face was no crimson, and he removed his hand to look at Hanbin who smiled   
broadly at him.

“You’re mean…” Jiwon whispered.

Hanbin smirked and got up, Jiwon watched him as he moved, his eyes widening as Hanbin stopped in front of him and promptly sat down on his lap, wrapping his hands around his neck.

Hanbin moved in swiftly pressing his lips to Jiwon’s, he closed his eyes as they continued to kiss, tilting his head to the side.

Hanbin opened his eyes nmhjkl,.com slightly, wondering where Jiwon’s hand’s were. 

He saw that Jiwon’s left hand was clutching onto the sofa fabric.

Wasting no time he reached out, letting his palm land on Jiwon’s forearm, he felt Jiwon flinch, he slid his hand along Jiwon’s arm, over his wrist and onto his hand, he managed to pry Jiwon’s fingers off of the fabric and entwine their fingers.

Jiwon moaned into the kiss, and he squeezed Hanbin’s hand, shifting about where he sat.

Hanbin felt a jolt of electricity shoot through his body, and he moved closer, inching his butt up Jiwon’s thighs, that’s when he felt something hard against him.

Jiwon jolted as Hanbin came into contact with his erect cock.

He swallowed hard and forced them to break apart so that he could catch his breath.

Hanbin chuckled, smiling warmly at Jiwon who’s eyes were shaking slightly and he swallowed hard to try and maintain his composure.

Hanbin moved his hips forward, pressing against the hardness while maintaining eye contact with Jiwon.

“Hanbin, the food…” Jiwon tried to put the breaks on, but Hanbin wouldn’t let him and placed a swift kiss on his lips.

Hanbin kept their gazes locked, and Jiwon watched as he slid off of his lap and came down to his knees in front of him.

Jiwon felt his heart stop for a second before it started beating erratically as he watched Hanbin place his hands on his knees, then slowly bring his hands up his thighs. 

Hanbin sucked his lips, he slid his hands all the way up to the top f Jiwon’s thighs, he paused and swallowed hard before he let his right hand slide over the tent in Jiwon’s pants.

Jiwon gasped audibly, squirming slightly.

Hanbin moved his hands up and started to undo Jiwon’s pants. 

Jiwon breathed in sharply, watching Hanbin’s hands as he hooked his fingers into his pants and pulled them down. 

Hanbin looked at Jiwon’s cock, taking it in his hand and stroking it a few times with long steady strokes up and down the length of the shaft before he pressed the head to his lips.

He heard Jiwon swallow, and he looked up and saw him staring.

Hanbin kept watching Jiwon’s face as he parted his lips, letting the head side in past the opening and further into his mouth.

Breathing through his nose Hanbin took the cock as far back as possible, Jiwon moaned deep down in his throat and his jolted several times.

Hanbin could feel Jiwon’s hips squirming against his right hand, JIwon obviously wanted to move his hips, but was restraining himself.

Hanbin pulled back, clenching his lips around the hard cock as it exited his mouth.

He watched as the cock slipped out. 

Jiwon shuddered and moaned loudly reaching out and placing his palm on Hanbin’s forehead to stop him from moving back in.

“Hanbin, what if the food comes?” Jiwon wheezed, when Hanbin looked back up at him he saw that Jiwon’s neck was also flushed.

“Stupid.” Hanbin hissed and grabbed Jiwon’s hand and moved it away from his forehead.

Hanbin moved Jiwon’s hand and placed it on the back of his own head, giving Jiwon a meaningful look as he turned his attention back to the throbbing dick in front of him.

Jiwon let out a shuddering breath, his fingers automatically grabbed a fistful of Hanbin’s hair and followed Hanbin’s head.

Hanbin held Jiwon’s cock with his right hand and guided it to his mouth.

As the underside of the cock head slid across his tongue Hanbin moaned and closed his lips around it, pushing the head into the roof of his mouth and sucking hard.

Jiwon’s body started jolting widely, and his hand on the back of Hanbin’s head pulling on his hair.

It was becoming impossible for Jiwon to hold his breathing in check and he let his head fall back and bit his lip trying to supress his moans.

Jiwon pushed Hanbin’s head forward, urging him to bob his head.

Hanbin followed Jiwon’s directions and started moving his head and he felt Jiwon’s body jolting uncontrollably.

The chime of the doorbell rang through the apartment, surprising them both and Jiwon surprised Hanbin by suddenly cumming in his mouth.

Hanbin pulled away, coughing intensyl.

“S-sorry.” Jiwon grumbled through heavy breaths.

Hanbin wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his shirt and got to his feet.

He left jiwon panting on teh sofa and disappeared.

Jiwon heard Hanbin going to the door and opening teh fromt door.

He hard muffled voices and after a little bit he heard the door close and waited fro hanbin to return.

Hanbin put the bag down on the table, he glanced over at Jiwon who was still a little petrified and hadn’t moved an inch.

“If were going to eat maybe you should fix yourself up a bit?” Hanbin glanced at Jiwon, who was still half laying on the sofa with his dick out.

Jiwon sat up and put his pants back on.

“Actually, I”ll go rinse my mouth, so how about you set up the rest?” Hanbin said nonchalantly as he got to his feet.

Hanbin left Jiwon to it, and when he returned he found that all the food was set up nicely on the table and that Jiwon had brought out some drinks.

“I didn’t know what you’d like with this food so I brought out what I had.” Jiwon said as he grabbed an ice tea and opened it.

“Thanks.” Hanbin said and looked through the various drinks.

They started to eat, and while they did so they watched TV.

Hanbin leaned on Jiwon again after he was done eating while Jiwon continued munching down food.

Once he was done he cleared away as much as he could without disturbing Hanbin.

Noticing Jiwon’s restrained movements Hanbin chuckled silently and snuggled up to him.

Jiwon cleared his throat and shifted slightly, suddenly his arm was laying across Hanbin’s chest.

Hanbin instantly reached out and grabbed Jiwon’s hand and entwining their fingers, squeezing his hand lightly, Jiwon returned the gesture with a soft squeeze.

They watched TV, but Hanbin wasn’t sure if either of them were paying it much attention.

Hanbin turned his head and caught Jiwon looking at him. 

Jiwon blushed and his mouth stretched into an embarrassed smile.

“What?” Hanbin laughed as he asked.

Jiwon brought his right hand to his face and covered his eyes for a moment, he let it fall as he breathed out.

“I… this feels so good… I’ve never felt like this before…” Jiwon said peering down at Hanbin.

Hanbin giggled.

“Never?” He teased.

“No… never…” Jiwon said huskily, fixing Hanbin with a heated gaze.

It was Hanbin’s time to blush, feeling his heart rate pick up.

Suddenly he was being pushed into a sitting position, Jiwon grabbed the back of his neck and turned his face and planted a sloppy kiss right on his mouth.

“Dummy…” Hanbin wheezed and started kissing Jiwon back, also reaching up to caress Jiwon’s face.

Jiwon paused, stroking Hanbin’s neck continuously.

“I love you… Only in my wildest dreams did I think this would ever happen.”

Hanbin felt his heart skip, and he smiled broadly.

“Well… we did fool around a few times, but I always just assumed you were pent up and alcohol had clouded your judgment…” 

“What?” Jiwon looked confused.

“I mean… I do remember kissing you once but…”

“Once? Dude, you’ve kissed me on like five different occasions… do you seriously only remember it happening once?” Hanbin felt perplexed, he’d always assumed that Jiwon was pretending that it had never happened. 

Jiwon looked surprised and very confused.

Hanbin leaned back with a serious look on his face.

“Then.. you don’t remember that time we jerked each other off either?”

“Wha- what!?” 

Hanbin laughed loudly, letting go of Jiwon to clutch at his stomach as he continued to laugh.

“I only remember the kiss…” he mumbled, still in mild shock over Hanbin’s words.

“Which kiss do you remember?” 

“The one just as we became high school seniors…”

Hanbin chuckled lightly.

“That one was the most uneventful… perhaps it was because you weren’t as drunk that time… it was the second time you kissed me.”

Jiwon rubbed his face with his hands, clearly showing his confusion and frustration.

“You were a little extra weird that night…” Hanbin recalled the scene to himself.

“You seemed extra agitated for some reason…”

Jiwon flinced, he paused for a second then cleared his throat.

“Hanbin… do you remember the night of the seniors graduation party?” Jiwon didn’y look at him as he asked.

Hanbin frowned as he tried to remember.

“Well… you weren’t there because you were sick…” Hanbin frowned deeply.

“That’s right… but after taking a nap I felt better… I got a text from Donghyuk...”

Hanbin looked at Jiwon, who turned to him with a frown on his face.

“He told me that you were on your way home, so I decided I’d meet you halfway, just to be sure you were OK.”

“But I didn’t see you at all..” Hanbin started, feeling confused.

‘Well, that’s because I did see you, but you.. you didn’t see me… because…”

Jiwon paused, his frown grew deeper as if he really didn’t like what he was thinking about.

“Because you were... preoccupied… kissing one of the seniors next to the maintenance building…” the words left a bitter taste in Jiwon’s mouth and he hated talking about what he’d seen that night more than he had thought.

“You know it’s meaningless now, right?” Hanbin asked after a brief pause. 

“I know… but, it felt like a punch to the gut… and even now it hurts… thinking about it…”

“Just stop.” Hanbin shook his head as he reached out and grabbed Jiwon’s, pulling it to the side so that they were face to face.

“Jiwon, that’s like ancient history! Also it was only that one time and it didn’t actually mean anything.” 

“I know…” Jiwon still seemed deeply frustrated.

“You know… at that time… if you had told me that things would turn out like this, I wouldn’t have believed you. So I went around a bit… but it’s not like you lived in celibacy, either.”

Jiwon smacked his fist onto his hand, he just couldn’t let go of the feeling easily now that he had lit a fire under it.

“I just… hated seeing it… a part of me was the homophobic, self-hatred thing. Another was plain old jealousy… both over you and of this other man who was able to be honest with himself and how that gave him a chance to be with you, when I had been denying myself for so long.”

“Well, Kim Jiwon, I can’t change the past, but I can tell you that it won’t help you in the slightest to think too much about what has already happened.”

Jiwon didn’t say anything and just watched Hanbin who had a determined look on his face.

“Jiwon, right now, I am here, with you. And you can either let these memories of all the things you haven’t done consume you and taint this relationship. Or you can kiss me like there’s no tomorrow.”

Jiwon blinked a few times, speechless.

Hanbin breathed heavily, staring at Jiwon.

Jiwon’s lips twitched, he then moved fast, throwing himself at Hanbin.

The kiss was intense, feverish, filled with a needy feeling and desperation.

Hanbin let his hand slide into Jiwon’s hair and grabbed a fistful, pulling his head hard to the side even more, the pain forced Jiwon to open his mouth wide to gasp and after a split second Hanbin shoved his tongue in.

Rubbing it along the inside of Jiwon’s cheek and up into the roof of his mouth Jiwon couldn’t stop himself from moaning into the kiss as his hands fumbled and groped at Hanbin’s body through his clothes.

Their desperation made it hard to synchronize their breathing, forcing them to separate several times as they wheezed for air.

Jiwon threw himself so hard at Hanbin that they toppled over and fell back onto the sofa.

Hanbin groaned as his back hit the soft sofa cushion, but JIwon didn’t have time to listen as he climbed on top of him and with his hand under his neck and tilted his head back and came down on Hanbin’s exposed neck, placing his lips upon his skin and kissing it intensely before separating his lips and sucking the skin in firecly.

Hanbin moaned, squirming under him letting his hands roam the length of Jiwon’s back.

Jiwon kissed his way up to Hanbin’s ear, taking the earlobe into his mouth and gently sank his teeth into it, making Hanbin wince with pain.

“Ouch, don’t do that.” He reached down and pinched Jiwon’s side, forcing him to remove himself from his ear.

“Ouch! Right back at yah!” Jiwon complained, grabbing Hanbin's hand and tearing it away from his side.

Hanbin wrung his arm free and grabbed Jiwon’s hand instead, entwining their fingers.

Hanbin used his other hand to grab Jiwon’s head and pulled him back into a kiss, sucking Jiwon’s lower lip into his mouth, gently and slowly. 

Hanbin slowed down the pace, and with long, slow kisses they managed to sync their breathing.

Hanbin’s grip on Jiwon softened and he started playing with Jiwon’s hair between his fingers.

Jiwon separated from Hanbin and hovered inches above his face, his eyes taking in the flushed skin and his lips that were swollen and even puffier than normal.

“I love you…” Jiwon said in a hushed voice, stroking Hanbin’s face.

Hanbin smiled warmly back at him.

“I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG! You guys! I'm sorry for just disappearing! I was dragged out of teh house on the weekend and then the week was crazy, crazy. So here's a double (Or 1 1/2) update.


	16. Extra: The night of the seniors farewell party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is an extra, please go back and read Chapter 15.

The party was already underway and Hanbin was on duty to work the barbeque.

“Hey, Hanbin where’s your other half?” 

Hanbin looked up at the man who had placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Minho hyung.” Hanbin smiled at then older man.

Minho squeezed Hanbin’s shoulder slightly, in his other hand he had a beer.

Hanbin watched as he took a swing from it.

‘You want one?” Minho chuckled.

“N-no thanks” Hanbin felt flustered and looked back down at the meat.

“Where is Jiwon, though? I haven’t seen him all day.” Minho looked around.

“He’s out sick.” Hanbin said casually flipping the meat around.

“Really now. I honestly don’t think I’ve seen one of you without the other. This is a first for me.” MInho laughed heartily, drinking some more.

Hanbin laughed nervously, he’d never been able to deal with the seniors easily, especially Minho.

Hanbin decided to deflect his approach by focusing on the grill in front of him.

“Minho oppa!” A girl called from a bit away from them.

Hanbin felt relieved as Minho excused himself to go talk to the girl.

*

As the party came to a close Hanbin was getting ready to leave, he’d somehow managed to avoid getting forced into drinking, even if it hadn’t been that bad overall.

He grabbed his things and turned to leave as Minho came up and grabbed his shoulder.

“I’ll walk you home.” He offered and started moving Hanbin towards the door before he’d managed to say goodbye to the other seniors.

“But hyung, shouldn’t you worry about getting yourself home? I mean I haven’t had any alcohol, but you have.” 

“Don’t worry, I want to walk you home.” He smiled slyly at him and continued to walk hanbin down the road.

Hanbin tried to make idle small chatter as they walked to dispel the awkwardness, but Minho was stuck to him like glue, making Hanbin embarrassed since his ulterior motives were becoming more and more clear.

**

Jiwon looked at his phone when he heard it vibrate, it was a text from Donghyuk.

[“How are you feeling? Hanbin hyung told me you were sick.”]

[“I feel better now. Is the party over?”]

[“Yeah, it just ended. Hanbin hyung left already tho.”]

[“OK. Hope it was all good. Did the seniors force you guys to drink?”]

[“It was great. No, not much at all. I’m honestly surprised they weren’t more forceful.”]

[“Well, that’s good. Thanks, man. See you maybe in a couple of days.”]

[“Alright. Get well soon, hyung.”]

Jiwon put his phone down.

He wanted to see that Hanbin was OK, so he got out of bed and put some more clothes on before he went out.

“Jiwon, where are you going at this hour?” His mother asked, clearly displeased that he was up and about.

“I’m going to see that Hanbin made it back alright. And then I’ll drop by the convenience store.”

“Alright. But wear the good shoes and bring an umbrella, it was raining just moments ago and it might start up again.”

“Yeah, thanks.’ He said and grabbed a couple of umbrellas and left.

When he exited the building he started in the direction of the convenience store, hoping that he’d meet Hanbin along the way.

As he strolled casually along the walkway, nearing the fence that separated the apartment complex, a small commotion caught his attention.

Next to maintenance building and among some bushes and trees he could just about distinguish two people seemingly having some sort of scuffle.

He looked away, thinking it wasn’t any of his business, but as he continued forward a familiar voice caught his attention.

He couldn’t hear what Hanbin was saying, but it was no doubt that it was him.

Jiwon backtracked and watched as Hanbin seemed to be talking animatedly to someone.

As the other person moved Jiwon was able to recognize him as the senior, Minho.

Jiwon was confused as to why they were talking next to the maintenance shed, as if they were hiding.

He continued to watch as Hanbin seemed to calm, it looked as if Minho had managed to convince him of something, and as Jiwon watched he saw the two men move closer.

His eyes widened as he saw Hanbin tilt his head to the said and back a little to received Minho’s kiss.

The first contact was swift and over almost as soon as it began, but it was quickly followed by another and another and another, until they were full-on making out.

Jiwon felt like he had been doused in a bucket of ice cold water.

He stared, his body was paralyzed, he felt sick to his stomach and he felt the anger bubbling up inside him. 

The lion roaring in his stomach wanted him to charge forward and separate the two, but something in his mind stopped him dead in his tracks.

A wave of frustration washed over him, and a sense of hopelessness.

His instant jealousy was overpowered and mixed with his need for self restraint and self-loathing, his stomach churned painfully and his head started to throb.

As rage filled him, his chest squeezing painfully he somehow managed to move his feet.

In an instant he was running full speed away from the two men.

He didn’t stop until his body wouldn’t let him run anymore. 

He stopped running an leaned against the wall, panting so hard his throat was hurting.

He slid down the wall and sat on the ground, his hands covering his face as he tried to catch his breath.

The image of the two men kissing was burned into his mind, his entire body was still shaking and he couldn’t really control his emotions.

It was so weird, he’d seen Hanbin on dates with girls or with girls hanging all over him. 

Heck, he’d seen Hanbin with guys hanging all over him, and he had to admit he’d wanted to punch a few of them, occasionally. 

He felt his eyes burning, and realized he must be crying.

He rubbed his face hard with frustration, throwing his hands down after rubbing his face until it hurt.

He sat there, motionless his mind churning to make sense of anything, but everything was just a big fuzzy nothing.

He didn’t know how long he’d been sitting there, when he came back to his senses he’s feet and ass were completely numb with cold.

He staggered to his feet, leaning heavily on the wall until he felt he could walk.

After figuring out where he was he walked slowly to the convenience store and bought various small things and slowly made his way back.

As he approached the apartment and the maintenance building he stopped and listened, just in case they were still there, but he heard nothing but the sounds of the night.

He walked slowly, keeping his gaze straight ahead.

He stopped just as he was leveled with the maintenance building, he stood there for a second before he turned his head and looked at the spot where he’d seen them, it was empty.

He sighed, the tension he’d been feeling letting go as he slumped down into a squatting position letting out a deep sigh.

He got back up and walked into the apartment building, his bag from the convenience store swinging freely back and forth, bumping into his leg as he walked.

The frustration, anger and sadness refused to let go, he hoped that sleep would help him put these feelings to rest, kill them, these feelings which he couldn’t breathe life into.


	17. Chapter 16

Hanbin ran the comb through his hair again, he stared at the result in the mirror studying himself before he brought the comb to his hair yet again.

The chime of a text on his phone pulled his attention away from the mirror and he pulled it out of his pocket and read the text.

[“Is a shirt and tie too much?”] 

Hanbin snorted at how nervous Jiwon was.

It had been two weeks since they’d officially gotten together, and Jiwon had really been putting in effort to be more open and work through his issues.

Today they were taking a big step forward by first going on a date then ending the day by going to a gay bar.

[“The shirt is probably fine, but drop the tie.”] he texted back.

The reply was a short OK, so Hanbin put the phone back in his pocket and went back to finish his hair.

An hour later Hanbin stood outside the entrance to the subway, he checked himself in the phone’s camera once more as he waited for Jiwon to arrive.

Just as he put the phone away someone tapped him on the shoulder.

Hanbin turned swiftly expecting Jiwon to stand there, but it wasn’t Jiwon.

“Hey, it’s been awhile.” Minho said in his low voice as he grinned at Hanbin.

Hanbin’s eyes widened in surprise, and he was unable to speak.

What were the odds of running into Minho of all people?

Remembering that Jiwon had witnessed the time he'd kissed with the man, he looked around anxiously before he grabbed Minho’s arm and dragged him away from the spot he’d agreed to meet Jiwon.

After turning a corner Hanbin faced Minho who looked mildly confused.

“Meeting someone?” The corner of his mouth twitched into a smile for a split second.

Hanbin was taken aback by his own actions, there really wasn’t any reason for them to hide, what happened with Minho that time wasn’t serious in any way.

Hanbin decided to avoid his question and asked him a question instead.

“What are you up to, hyung?” It was an awkward question but it was the first thing that came to mind.

“Oh, not much. Just doing some shopping.” Minho replied cheerfully.

Hanbin sighed with relief when he managed to avoid answering Minho’s question. 

After looking at Minho’s soft smile for a moment it dawned on him that Minho had never been the smartest, nad it seemed to benefit Hanbin this time.

Now he just needed to send Minho on his way before Jiwon showed up, he didn’t need anyone to trigger Jiwon into reverting.

“You look good.” Minho took a step forward, his eyes fixed on Hanbin who felt himself go red.

Minho grinned at him.

Hanbin was surprised that Minho was flirting with him out in the open.

“Th-thanks.” Hanbin stuttered.

“You look distracted, how about I get your contact info, then we can meet another time.” Minho’s suggestion had a slight forceful undertone, it reminded Hanbin of the night he’d kissed Minho.

Hanbin wracked his brain to find some excuse not to, but as his phone rang he found himself automatically taking it out of his pocket.

He looked at the screen and saw that it was Jiwon who was calling, which meant that he had probably arrived to find that he wasn’t there.

Now worried that Jiwon would come and find Hanbin hiding away with another man he started fidgeting a little while wringing his brain for a way to get out of this situation.

Minho held back his laughter as he watched Hanbin’s panic grow. 

Hanbin couldn’t come up with anything and he fixed Minho with a glare and told him his phone number.

Minho instantly pulled out his phone and typed it in.

‘Thanks, I’ll get going now. I’ll text you.” Minho turned and waved with his phone in his hand as he walked away.

Hanbin didn’t know what to do, but after calming down for a moment he figured he could find a way to get Minho off his case later.

He straightened his clothes and turned the corner to find Jiwon looking confused as he looked at his phone several times and looking up to look around.

Hanbin found the right timing to come out from around the corner and he approached Jiwon. 

Once Jiwon spotted him he grinned broadly, walking towards him with brisk steps. 

Jiwon stopped in front of Hanbin, smiling shyly, his cheeks slightly tinted.

Seeing Jiwon like this made his heart race and Hanbin couldn’t help smiling shyly himself.

“Hey” Jiwon said on an exhale as if he’d been holding his breath, fiddling with his hands.

Hanbin’s chest squeezed lightly, he sucked in his lower lip and chuckled, squirming slightly where he stood.

The two embarrassed men stood there for a moment, just basking in the moment of the beginning of their first date as a couple. 

Jiwon cleared his throat suddenly.

“Where did you go? You texted me saying that you were already here.” Jiwon looked at Hanbin innocently.

Hanbin felt a pang in his chest, should he tell Jiwon the truth?

After all he was going to find a way to shoot Minho down regardless of his intentions. 

But at the same time he really didn’t want to say anything that would make Jiwon close up, especially on their first date in public.

“Oh, I just had to go to the toilet real quick, sorry I didn’t answer I was drying my hands.” His lie was very convincing.

“OK. Are you alright?” Jiwon asked, he sounded concerned.

‘Yes, I’m perfectly fine. Maybe I’m just a little nervous…” He felt himself blush again, this was actually true.

Even if this wasn’t his first date, everything that he did with Jiwon felt like the first time. 

Jiwon laughed a little and reached out and nudged Hanbin’s hand.

“Me too.”

As their eyes met they seemed to sparkle and the bustle of the world around them seemed to almost disappear, becoming only muffled background noise.

“Hey.” Jiwon siad, but his voice was choked so he had to clear hos throat.

“If we’re gonna make the movie I think we need to get moving.” 

Hanbin felt his face grow hot and he tore his gaze away, and laughed nervously.

“Yeah, let’s get going.” He said and turned and started in the direction of the cinema.

Jiwon followed, and quickly moved to walk beside him.

Once they arrived at the cinema they went to the kiosk since Jiwon had bought the tickets online, so they bought a few things and then waited until the could go in.

They found there seats and got set up, as the room became dark and the movie started they were both eagerly watching the screen, since it was a movie they’d both wanted to watch.

Feeling his eyes growing tired Hanbin pulled his eyes away from the screen, his gaze then fell on the armrest between their seats, he saw that Jiwon was resting his elbow on it, his hand resting on his thigh.

Hanbin looked around, there was no one sitting on their row.

He licked his lips and went for it, he reached out and gently pressed his hand against Jiwon’s.

He saw as Jiwon jolted in surprise and saw that he side-eyed him.

Hanbin was busy watching Jiwon’s face and thought his heart was about to jump out of his chest when Jiwon grabbed his hand firmly, squeezing it a little.

Hanbin couldn’t stop himself from smiling broadly, and he was sure his face was as red as a tomato, so he was glad the room was dark.

He looked at Jiwon, and their eyes met, they both turned back to face the screen, embarrassed.

Hanbin couldn’t stop himself from grinning, and he took a quick glance towards Jiwon and saw him smiling as well.

Hanbin felt all warm and fuzzy inside, he could tackle the man right here and now.

Hanbin leaned over as if to whisper something to Jiwon.

Jiwon who felt Hanbin leaning towards him, did the same while keeping his eyes froward.

Hanbin got up close to Jiwon’s ear and whispered.

“I love you.”

He felt Jiwon freeze momentarily, and as his lips swiftly touched Jiwon’s ear by accident, he felt that it was super warm to the touch.

Hanbin did his best to suppress his laughter, clutching his free hand to his mouth, but he could feel himself vibrating in his seat.

He really didn’t expect Jiwon to reply or anything, so he basked in the sight that was Jiwon looking super embarrassed.

Suddenly Jiwon wriggled his hand free from Hanbin’s grasp.

Hanbin stopped laughing, his heart fell down into the pit of his stomach.

Perhaps he’d gone too far?

Dread filled him and his chest felt tight.

Jiwon didn’t look at him, but Hanbin was surprised as he felt Jiwon’s finger in the palm of his hand.

It took him a split second to realize what Jiwon was doing, but as soon as he understood, his heart flew from the bottom and almost out of him as Jiwon wrote the tree words into his hand.

“I. Love. You.” 

Hanbin had no idea how he survived after that, he certainly didn’t catch the end of the movie, but he really didn’t care.

When the movie was done and they were leaving, Hanbin caught a glimpse of both their faces in a mirror, they both looked flushed.

Hanbin chuckled happily, he really wished he could hold Jiwon’s hand, but knew it was impossible.

Hanbin instead took a few steps closer and smushed up against Jiwon and said in a hushed voice so that only Jiwon would hear.

‘Maybe we should go on vacation to a place where we can hold hands in public?”

Jiwon was silent for a moment, before he looked at Hanbin, his smile was a little cheeky.

“I’d like that.”

Hanbin’s heart almost exploded, he had only intended to teas a little, even if he did really want to go to such a place, he hadn’t expected Jiwon to agree with him.

“How many times are you gonna almost give me a heart attack tonight?” Hanbin wheezed dramatically, clutching his hand to his chest.

“Just making up for lost time…” he said matter-of-factly, looking smug.

“Your face is so red.” He laughed.

“You just watch yourself!” Hanbin raised his voice and kicked Jiwon’s butt.

Jiwon laughed and speed up a little, Hanbin came after him and tried to hit him a few more times.

“You see?! I’m also making up for lost time!” Hanbin yelled as he followed Jiwon, who was laughing loudly at this point.

Jiwon suddenly turned a corner into an alleyway, and Hanbin followed.

When he turned the corner he couldn’t see Jiwon at all.

It was a dark alleyway, with only one light which barely lit up the place, it was filled with dumpsters and trash bags.

Hanbin walked further in, and as he passed the first drumpster someone grabbed him.

Hanbin collided with Jiwon’s chest, and for a moment they remained still as they tried to catch their breath.

Hanbin looked up at Jiwon and met his gaze.

“Sorry, it’s not the most… romantic of places…” Jiwon grumbled looking around to indicate the alleyway.

Hanbin was confused by what he was trying to say, but all his thoughts were blown away as Jiwon placed his hand on the back of Hanbin’s neck and came in to kiss him.

Hanbin let his eyes fall shut and tilted his head eagerly, reaching up to wrap his arms around Jiwon’s neck as they kissed.

There was no telling how much time had passed, but Hanbin felt his entire body grow increasingly hot, dangerously hot.

If they didn’t stop now he was gonna get a full blown erection.

Hanbin pulled away, and the bubble started bursting, but very slowly, there still seemed to be stars and sparkles hanging around in the air.

“That was getting too dangerous…” Hanbin wheezed.

“Don’t I know it…” Jiwon grumbled and Hanbin looked down to see the slightest strain in Jiwon’s pants.

Hanbin looked up at him, his cheeks flushed.

“I’m both pleased and embarrassed…” Hanbin said while staring at Jiwon’s crotch.

“Well stop looking, you’re not helping.” He scoffed and tried to cover it with his hands.

“Uh, so what do you wanna do? Want me to… uh… help you?” Hanbin suggested, it was the only thing he could think of.

“Are you crazy? Kissing is one thing, but any hanky panky in an alleyway?”

“I can’t believe you just said hanky panky…”

“Shut up!” Jiwon became even redder than before.

Hanbin started laughing, his chest filled with a warm fuzzy feeling, and he couldn’t have stopped smiling to save his life.

“Guess we’ll just have to wait then…” He shrugged, while still trying to stifling his laughter.

Jiwon just sighed deeply, standing perfectly still.

After a little while Jiwon stood up straight and fixed his clothes, he still looked embarrassed, but was putting on a stoic expression and cleared his throat. 

“Should we head to our next stop or do you wanna call it a night?” Hanbin gave him a curious look.

“Let’s continue.” He said after clearing his throat once more.

“OK. Let’s go then.” Hanbin said enthusiastically and lead Jiwon out of the  
alleyway and down the road to get to the next place.

They found the way back to the subway, Hanbin made small talk v in an attempt to elevate Jiwon’s embarrassment. 

He wasn’t sure if it worked, but it was still a little funny to him.

When they got off the subway Hanbin felt his phone vibrate in his pocket.

He pulled it out to see that it was a call from Donghyuk.

“Jiwon wait a sec, I’m gonna take this.”

They huddled close to the wall as Hanbin answered the phone.

[“Hey, where are you?” Donghyuk asked.

“I’m out, why? Where are you?”

[“I was just at your place… now I’m walking to the subway.”]

“Did you just get back?”

[“Yeah, I need a place to crash. So where are you? Will you be long?”]

“Yeah, I’m ot going home just yet.”

“Just tell him to come.” Jiwon said, he’d been huddled up next to Hanbin and had heard the whole conversation. 

“Are you sure?” Hanbin was surprised.

“Yeah, it’s Donghyuk, so it’s fine.” He shrugged.

[“Ah, you’re with Jiwon-hyung? Wait, are you perhaps on a date?!”] With the excitement and slightly teasing tone in Donghyuk’s voice it was now Hanbin’s turn to feel embarrassed, he could feel his cheeks heating up, and he knew he must be beet red.

He caught Jiwon’s eye and saw him chuckling.

Hanbin nudged him with his elbow, but this only made him laugh harder.

[“Hanbin?”] 

“Uh, I’ll text you the location, well be there when you get there.”

[“OK. See you later then.”] 

They hung up and Hanbin texted Donghyuk the location of the bar.

“Hopefully he’ll find it…” Hanbin said in a low voice.

“I’m sure he’ll be fine…. he’s a big boy now.” Jiwon chortled and pushed away from the wall, heading towards the exit.

“Indeed he is a big boy. He seems to be dealing with something at his uni at the moment tho, I don’t know what…”

“Maybe he’s having love problems? Like a stalker?” Jiwon said light heartedly.

“That’s not funny, Jiwon.” Hanbin said sternly.

“I know… I’m just joking. If anyone can handle themselves it’s Donghyuk. We both know that he only looks sweet.”

“I suppose you’re right…” Hanbin sighed and caught up with Jiwon just as the exited the station.

“This way.” Hanbin said and pulled on Jiwon’s sleeve to make him follow him.


	18. Chapter 17

Hanbin lead Jiwon along the small side road, and stopped in front of the door to the bar.

“Well… here we are.” Hanbin said as he gestured towards the door.

Jiwon came to a stop next to him, he looked at the door and took a deep breath.

“Look, this place is pretty much like any bar, so let’s just grab a drink or two and wait for Donghyuk, OK?” Hanbin nudged Jiwon.

“Un~” Jiwon said in a low voice.

Hanbin also braced himself and took the first step forward, he glanced to the side and saw hat Jiwon was following him.

Feeling a little relieved he continued forward and opened the door to go inside.

He lead the way and walked briskly towards a table.

He didn’t make eye contact with anyone as he lead Jiwon inside.

He didn’t walk very ar and grabbed a table close to, but slightly hidden from the entrance.

“What do you want, I’ll go and get it.” Hanbin said as he threw off his jacket onto the seat.

“A beer would be good.” Jiwon said, feeling a little awkward and shy.

“Got it! I’ll be right back.” Hanbin strode off in the direction of the bar.

“Hanbin?” 

The familiar voice made Hanbin stop dead in his tracks.

He looked in the direction of the voice and locked eyes with Yunhyeong who looked just as surprised as he was that they had met, though it might not be so strange, since it was Yunhyeong who’d introduced him to the place.

His eyes darted behind the man and he saw both Jinhwan and Junhoe, who both gave him a short greeting.

“Are you here alone, why don’t you join us?” He suggested.

Hanbin cleared his throat.

“Uh, actually… I’m here with… someone…” Hanbin said, feeling awkward.

There was a sudden hand on Hanbin’s shoulder, and he turned to see Jiwon standing there, stiff like a statue.

“Actually, I kinda want some soju as well… what kind of food do they have here?” He glared at Yunhyeong and guided Hanbin away from him.

“Don’t be a jerk, Jiwon.” Hanbin snapped at him.

“Don’t care, I’m not over it.”

“Well, that’s really mature of you.” Yunhyeong spat back.

“Whatever asshole.” Jiwon snapped and grabbed Hanbin by the waist and pulled him in the direction of the bar.

“Jiwon, you know that nothing was going to happen between me and Yunhyeong, right?” 

Jiwon didn’t say anything he just looked sour, and he remained deep in thought even as they arrived at the bar.

Jiwon ordered his beer and soju, Hanbin also placed his order and they waited 

Hanbin inched closer and pressed up against Jiwon. 

“Jiwon… Even if Yunhyeong confessed to me… his feelings will fade and over time…” Hanbin said in a low voice.

“How do you know?” Jiwon interrupted him.

“We loved each other one sidedly for a long time, how do you know that his feelings will fade so easily?”

“Well, you’re right. I can’t be sure, but we were both young, hopeful and naive…” Hanbin sighed.

“But Yunhyeong knows how much I like you, but if you’re not well behaved, maybe, just maybe, he will come and kick your ass for me.” Hanbin tried to be funny.

He saw Jiwon’s lips twitch sort of into a smile.

“As if that twig could even land a punch.” He snorted and pushed up from the bar.

Their drinks arrived and they headed back to their table together.

As they passed Yunhyeong’s table, he was nowhere to be seen.

Instead Jinhwan and Junhoe were sitting there now.

“Oh, Hanbin! It’s been awhile!” Jinhwan exclaimed, he got up and took Hanbin’s hand.

Jiwon leaned forward, with a deep frown on his face, forcing Jinhwan to lean back.

“Let go, please.” He said flatly.

“Aish, this asshole! What is he doing here?!” Jinhwan exclaimed and flew backwards his back hitting the table edge. 

Jiwon kept the stern look on his face, and Hanbin felt him grab his hand and forcefully pulled it upwards.

Jiwon held out their clasped hands.

“Mine.” He said in the same flat voice and then walked forward, pulling Hanbin with him.

Jinhwan simply stared at them wide-eyed as Hanbin felt super embarrassed.

Jiwon lead hanbin back to their table and they sat down with their drinks.

“I can’t believe you did that.” Hanbin said, hiding his face in his hands.

“Hm… I’ve always wanted to do that.” Jiwon said casually as he sat down.

Hanbin froze.

His heart rate slowly picked up pace and he could feel his face grow hot.

“Heh, you’re beet red all the way up to your ears.” Jiwon chuckled and he couldn’t wipe the grin from his face.

Hanbin somehow managed to make himself sit down and he instantly hid his face in his hands as soon as his ass hit the seat.

He peeked at Jiwon through his fingers, seeing that his face was still smug.

“I can’t believe you today.” 

“What? You got complaints?”

“As a matter of fact. You’ve been making my heart race like crazy since earlier. I might actually have a heart attack at this rate.”

Jiwon reached out and pried one of Hanbin's hands away from his face.

He entwined their fingers and held Hanbin’s hand firmly.

“Kim Hanbin, I’ve been really happy today. I’ve seen your precious smile many times and seen your incredibly cute, flustered face.”

Hanbin kept part of his face hidden as Jiwon spoke.

“So even of it’s taken a great amount of effort and been way out of my comfort zone, I’m incredibly happy that we did this.”

Jiwon laughed a little with a crooked smile as he massaged Hanbin’s hand.

Hanbin’s chest filled with a warm and fuzzy feeling, how incredible it was that Jiwon was pushing himself this much. 

A wave of guilt suddenly washed over him, killing the buzz as he remembered meeting Minho earlier.

Yet again he found his mind spinning, he felt that he should be honest with Jiwon, he didn’t want to keep anything from him.

“I'm incredibly happy to hear that, again, you might actually give me heart attack.”

“Jiwon, I…” Hanbin was interrupted by the sudden appearance of Yunhyeong. 

They both looked up at Yunhyeong at the same time, it was obvious that he was drunk.

“Yunhyeong, what are you doing?” Hanbin started to get up, his hands out to try and calm Yunhyeong.

But he wasn’t even looking at Hanbin, his eyes were locked on Jiwon. 

“You-” He slurred, pointing at Jiwon who remained in place, simply watching as Yunhyeong placed his hand on the table to steady himself.

Yunhyeong paused for a moment.

“Yunhyeong, you should go back.” Hanbin said softly, trying to keep the situation from escalating.

Hanbin turned slightly to see if he could spot either Jinhwan or Junhoe, but he couldn’t see them anywhere.

Yunhyeong swayed slightly where he stood, he opened his mouth several times without saying anything.

Jiwon looked away and took another swing from his beer before he suddenly got to his feet and stepped out to face Yunhyeong.

Hanbin watched as Jiwon puffed up a little as he stood right in front of Yunhyeong.

Feeling anxious that this might turn in to an all out brawl Hanbin stepped out to stand in between them, but Jiwon pulled him aside and then behind his back.

“Say what you wanna say, asshole, before I mop the floor with you.” Jiwon’s voice was oddly calm, but his presence was chilling.

“You know…” Yunhyeong began, he didn’t seem frightened by Jiwon at all.

Jiwon didn’t budge as YUnhyeong spoke.

“You know, I think we would’ve made a great couple…” he began, finally making a full sentence.

Hanbin could see Jiwon’s jaw tighten from behind and he used some force to wring his wrist free and grab Jiwon’s hand, squeezing it in an attempt at keeping him calm.

“Well, we both know that it wasn’t gonna happen. After all hanbin’s loved me for a long time, and he still does!” Jiwon spat smuggly, giving Hanbin’s and a little squeeze back.

Hanbin felt his heart start to pound, it was embarrassing to have Jiwon proclaim this out loud.

“HA! And how long will it last… unlike us, you can date women, you scum.” Yunhyeong jabbed his finger into Jiwon’s chest.

Hanbin watched as Jiwon tensed, and as the grip on his hand tightened.

“Like, can you even get it up for a man?” Yunhyeong snarled nastily, the look in his eye was absolutely vicious. 

Hanbin felt a pang in his chest, even though he knew the truth, it still hurt for the words to be spoken out loud so suddenly.

Jiwon’s grip on Hanbin became tighter, almost painful.

“Yunhyeong, that’s!” Hanbin started but again he was interrupted by someone appearing next to them.

Donghyuk stood clear eyed and ready next to them.

“Hey!” He paused, observing the situation some more. 

“Don’t tell me you’re about to get into a fight?”

Donghyuk dropped his bag to the floor as he spoke.

“Don’t get involved, Donghyuk.” Jiwon snarled darkly, not taking his eyes off of Yunhyeong.

“You really should stop before you all get kicked out.” Donghyuk sighed.

“Now that Donghyuk is here let’s just leave.” Hanbin said and gathered his things without waiting for anyone’s reply.

“Honestly, I wouldn’t mind a drink.” Donghyuk grumbled, pouting a little.

Hanbin felt a little flustered as he eyed Yunhyeong and Jiwon.

Jiwon got up and opened his mouth, but he couldn’t get a word out before Yunhyeong had reached out and grabbed the front of Jiwon’s t-shirt.

“Now, you listen here…” Yunhyeong snarled.

“If you make Hanbin cry, if you’re just playing him…. I swear that I’ll… I’ll!” Yunhyeong’s eyes were filled with fury and he wouldn’t let go of Jiwon.

“Hey, look here, buddy.” Donghyuk stepped in between the two men and separated them, by grabbing Yunhyeong’s arm and pulling it off of Jiwon.

“Who the hell are you?” Yunhyeong looked at Donghyuk, who smirked.

“I’m their friend, and who are you supposed to be, asshole?” 

Hanbin grabbed Donghyuk’s shoulder and brought him close enough so that he could whisper in to his ear.

“He’s the guy that I was talking about.” 

Donghyuk’s eyes widened slightly as he leaned away from hanbin and looked at Yunhyeong.

Donghyuk then looked at Jiwon who was still maintaining his composure somehow.

“Look, I get that this guy annoys you, but let’s just go. This guy is pretty intoxicated.”

“Hey, I’m… not… that drunk!” Yunhyeong slurred slightly as he spoke.

“Whatever, man. If you’ve got something to say, save it for when you’re sober.” Donghyuk snapped and grabbed both Hanbin and Jiwon and started for the door.

Donghyuk pushed the two infront of him, he paused and reached for his bag and stood up to follow the two, but Yunhyeong suddenly grabbed the back of his sweater and yanked him back.

“What the hell?” Donghyuk yelled out in shock as he stumbled backwards.

Yunhyeong was still holding onto him as he feel, the added weight toppled Donghyuk over and he brought Yunhyeong with him.

Donghyuk fell to the ground hard, the force knocking the air out of him and he closed his eyes on impact. 

The next sensation that he noticed was hot and wet, the unmistakable sensation of lips on his mouth. 

Donghyuk opened his eyes just as Yunhyeong was pulled off of him.

“Donghyuk are you OK?” Hanbin asked sounding slightly frantic.

Jiwon was the one who yanked Yunhyeong off of him, and he was holding him in place by the back of his clothes. 

“Yunhyeong? There you are! I thought you were in the bathroom!” Jinhwan appeared and grabbed a silent Yunhyeong. 

Jinhwan pushed Yunhyeong in between him and Junhoe to hold him steady.

He turned his attention to Hanbin.

“Is your friend OK?” 

Hanbin was helping Donghyuk to his feet.

“I’m fine. My back hurts, but I’m fine.” Donghyuk placed a hand on his back, rubbing the sore spot a few times before forcing himself to stand straight.

He looked at Yunhyeong who seemed completely out of it as he was hanging off of Jinhwan and Junhoe’s shoulders.

He touched his lips gently, under his fingertips he could feel that they were slightly swollen where they’d collided.

“Let’s go.” Jiwon said darkly, grabbing Donghyuk’s bag and then both Donghyuk and Hanbin.

Together the three of them turned to walk away.

“Take care.” Hanbin shouted back at the other three left standing there.

“I’ll text you tomorrow or something!” He added just as Jiwon sped up and they went out the door.


	19. Chapter 18

Jiwon stopped in front of the door to Hanbin’s apartment, for a moment he pondered whether he could just use the passcode to the door, but he hadn't talked to Hanbin about it yet.

However, it was still quite early, so ringing the doorbell would probably cause an unnecessary commotion, no one inside was probably up yet anyway.

Jiwon figured it was probably ok and punched in the passcode and went inside. 

The automatic entrance light turned on, but the rest of the apartment was dark and completely silent.

He went straight for the kitchen, placing the bags of food he’d bought on his way to Hanbin’s place on the counter before he wandered towards Hanbin’s bedroom.

He spotted Donghyuk sleeping quietly on the couch, his arms crossed behind his head and a blanket covering him.

Last night Jiwon had decided to go home instead of spending the night.

When he said this Hanbin hadn’t been able to hide his disappointment and his pouty face was super cute, reinforcing hi notion that if he did stay the night he wouldn't have been able to leave him alone.

Blushing slightly as the thought slithered across his mind he continued on his path to Hanbin’s bedroom.

He opened the door and saw Hanbin sprawled out on the bed, sleeping soundly as the room was filled with the sound of his slow and steady breaths.

Jiwon walked slowly towards him and whispered Hanbin’s name to wake him up without causing a panic.

Hanbin stirred, his brow furrowing as he started to wake.

“Jiwon?” He yawned, still pretty out of it as he stretched in bed.

“Hey, mornin.” Jiwon said and sat down on the edge of the bed.

Hanbin grinned sheepishly, making Jiwon’s heart skip a beat.

“Why’re you here so early?” 

“I got us all some breakfast… also I wanted to see you…” Jiwon said, feeling a tad embarrassed, but the big grin that stretched across Hanbin’s face made the feeling disappear in a big fuzzy ball of warm that swelled and filled his chest.

“Hehe, your face is red…” Hanbin teased in a gruff morning voice.

“Dummy…” Jiwon pouted, reaching out and taking Hanbin’s hand.

Hanbin grinned sheepishly, he was unbearably cute.

Jiwon threw himself on top of Hanbin, who grunted as Jiwon’s weight landed on him. 

They were hugging for a moment, but Hanbin who was being squashed by Jiwon wriggled around to get free.

“Did I hear you say that you brought breakfast?” 

“Oh, yeah.” Jiwon sat up again, the food had slipped his mind.

Jiwon got to his feet, reaching out to help Hanbin up.

Hanbin grabbed Jiwon’s hand, getting out of bed and grabbing his phone from the bedside table. 

“Where should we eat?” Jiwon asked, as he reached the door.

“There’s not enough space for three in the kitchen…” Hanbin said.

‘Then kick him out.” Jiwon said shortly.

“Haha” Hanbin laughed sarcastically.

The exited the bedroom and Jiwon headed for the kitchen, leaving Hanbin to wake Donghyuk up.

Hanbin stopped next to Donghyuk who appeared to be sleeping soundly.

Hanbin called his name a few times, but it only seemed to make him stirr slightly.

Feeling a little annoyed Hanbin used his foot to push Donghyuk several times until he opened his eyes.

“What’d you that for?” Donghyuk asked in a voice heavy with sleep.

“You weren't waking up when I called your name so…” Hanbin grinned evilly as he brought his foot back down to the floor.

“Wow, your lip is kinda swollen…” Hanbin leaned down and got a closer look at Donghyuk’s mouth.

Donghyuk automatically looked down, even if he couldn’t actually see anything, but his hand also whipped up and he ran his fingers across his lips and he stopped over the small swelling near the corner of his mouth.

“Shit…” He cursed under his breath.

Jiwon arrived with the food, taking Hanbin’s attention from Donghyuk.

“Jiwon came with breakfast so you better sit up.” Hanbin said to Donghyuk, who moved up to allow the other two to sit on the sofa with him. 

“Hey.” Donghyuk yawned as Hanbin sat down next to him and Jiwon put the food down on the table before joining the two.

“It’s cramped…” Donghyuk commented and squirmed a little. 

Neither Hanbin or Jiwon said anything as they settled in and started preparing the food, by opening them and placing them together accordingly.

They ate while chatting about various things.

Once they were done eating Donghyuk jumped up and offered to clear everything away, since he was a freeloader after all.

Once Donghyuk was out of sight, Jiwon scooted closer to Hanbin who had grabbed the remote to turn the TV on.

“What are you doing?” Hanbin asked without even looking at Jiwon.

“Hm… cuddling?” Jiwon said in a teasing tone as his chin perched on top of hanbin’s shoulder.

Hanbin felt his face grow hot, but tried to act unbothered,

“Don’t try to pretend that you don’t like it.” Jiwon grumbled, digging his chin into Hanbin’s shoulder.

Jiwon’s arms came up and wrapped around as much of Hanbin as possible. 

Hanbin squirmed.

Hanbin could feel Jiwon’s breath on his neck, it was making his skin hot and tingly.

“Hey, stop it.” Hanbin hissed under his breath.

Jiwon chuckled loudly.

“But Donghyuk knows…” Jiwon drawled, leaning back feeling a little disappointed.

“Still… there's a guest…” Hanbin said curtly.

“So? It’s not like we were be going hot and heavy…” Jiwon pointed out keeping his eyes on Hanbin.

He noticed that Hanbin jolted a little as he said it, and saw that his flush had spread to his ears.

Jiwon reached up and touched his ear, it as hot to the touch, and he grinned while watching Hanbin twitch when he touched him.

“Yah! Stop flirting!” Donghyuk yelled out from behind them, and the two on the sofa jumped a mile in the air.

“Mind your own business!” Jiwon yelled back, reaching down and forcefully grabbing Hanbin’s hand and entwining their fingers.

Hanbin used his free hand to cover his embarrassed face. 

“Urgh… I think I’m gonna be sick…” Donghyuk complained sarastically.

“How immature! Then get out!” Jiwon barked back playfully.

“Maybe I will.” Donghyuk snarler.

“Hanbin, give me the whereabouts of this Yunhyeong guy, I want compensation!” Donghyuk seemed determined.

“What, you gonna beat him up?” Jiwon asked.

“No… I’m gonna make him buy me a round, cuz thanks to that prick I didn't get to drink last night.”

‘Isn’t it too early to go out drinking?” Hanbin asked looking at the watch on the wall.

“I suppose, then he can spend the day with me as compensation.” Donghyuk crossed his arms in a pleased manor, he seemed thoroughly pleased with his plan.

“That sounds like a great plan!” Jiwon chimed in and sat up to grab Hanbin’s phone which was laying on the table.

“What are you doing?” Hanbin asked in a slight panic.

“I am going to send a text from your phone, and send Donghyuk the number.” Jiwon explained as he typed on Hanbin’s phone.

Hanbin tried to protest, but Jiwon was too quick and had sent the text before Hanbin had even gotten a single word out.

It only took a few moments for Yunhyeong to answer.

Hanbin could see a vein throbbing in Jiwon’s temple, it clearly irked him that Yunhyeong replied so quickly.

“He said he’s free and to meet at the XX plaza. Do you know where it is?” Jiwon asked looking up at Donghyuk.

“Yeah, I’ve been there a few times before. Then I’ll go get ready. Don’t get into any trouble while I’m gone….” He teased them as he walked to the bathroom. 

“I hope he really is only going to do those things…” Hanbin grumbled as he looked back at the TV screen.

“You know Donghyuk, he might be stubborn ass sometimes, but he’s not that crazy.”

“I suppose you’re right…” Hanbin sighed.

“Now… can you stop talking about other guys for even a moment?” Jiwon grunted darkly, not bothering to hide his annoyance.

Hanbin let a smirk cross his face for a second.

“What? You jealous?” He looked at Jiwon whose face was grim and sour.

“I don’t need to spell it out do I?” He hissed and reached up and grabbed Hanbin’s head, pulling him into a kiss which knocked their teeth together.

“Ouch!” Hanbin yelled and tried to push Jiwon back, but it was futile.

“If you don’t want your guest to come running you might wanna quiet down.” Jiwon said in a hushed voice before he sealed Hanbin’s lips again.

Hanbin felt a little annoyed, it was as if Jiwon was using the fact that Donghyuk was there and Hanbin’s potential embarrassment to silence him and keep him from refusing.

“You’re playing dirty…” Hanbin hissed when they broke apart to breath. 

Jiwon simply chortled and came in to kiss him yet again.

The sound of the bathroom door had them moving apart, Jiwon smirked broadly and Hanbin shot a dirty look at him, which only made Jiwon chuckle. 

“Hey, don’t be mean to each other now.” Donghyuk chimed from behind them. 

“Are you leaving now?” Hanbin turned to look at Donghyuk who was putting a jacket on.

“Yeah.” 

“Seems like you two lovebirds want some privacy anyway…” Donghyuk chuckled softly as he teased them.

“Thanks man.” Jiwon exclaimed happily, turning around to wave at Donghyuk while Hanbin smacked him a few times.

Once Donghyuk was out the door Jiwon turned back around and plopped down comfortably on the couch.

“Such a considerate guy.” He said happily and grabbed Hanbin’s thigh.

Hanbin jolted as Jiwon massaged his thigh.

“Your face is red…” Jiwon noted and leaned in, kissing Hanbin’s cheek. 

Hanbin didn’t say anything and let Jiwon continue to tease him.

Jiwon let his hand slide up and down Hanbin’s thigh a few times all the while he kept on kissing him, making his way from his cheek to the jawline and back towards his ear and then down his neck.

Jiwon could feel the heat radiating off of Hanbin’s skin, and smirked as Hanbin tilted his neck to allow him more access.

Jiwon shifted his weight a little to move closer to Hanbin, but suddenly Hanbin jumped up, throwing himself around and was on top of him instead.

Hanbin looked smug as he straddled Jiwon’s lap.

Hanbin still hadn’t said a word as he let his hand slide up Jiwon’s arm and letting his hand move into Jiwon’s hair, grabbing a fist full and pulling his head back.

Now in control, Hanbin moved in to kiss Jiwon’s lips, sucking the lower lip into his mouth a little before he went back to kissing.

Jiwon gave a grunty laugh as he let Hanbin do whatever he wanted.

Jiwon placed his hands on Hanbin’s thighs, again massaging with his fingers digging into his body.

Hanbin started rolling his hips, grinding on Jiwon. 

Jiwon groaned into the kiss, feeling even more aroused by Hanbin taking control of the situation.

Hanbin quickly deepened the kiss, sticking his tongue out and pressing them to Jiwon’s mouth, and Jiwon parted his lips without hesitating and slid his tongue out to meet Hanbin’s.

Hanbin moaned deep down in his throat, he let the hand he’d had in Jiwon’s hair slide down his neck and down his back.

He hooked his fingers into the bottom of Jiwon’s t-shirt and pulled it up, exposing Jiwon’s back.

Jiwon sat up and lifted his arms as Hanbin pulled his tee up and over his head, forcing them to stop kissing.

Hanbin tossed the tee to the side and brought his hands down on to Jiwon’s shoulders before he slowly let them caress his bare upper body.

Jiwon breathed slowly as Hanbin’s hands travelled down his body, turning slightly as the traveled over his pecs and onto his upper abdomen, his fingertips tickling Jiwon’s sides.

Hanbin didn’t stop until his hands reached the top of Jiwon’s pants, where he paused momentarily fixing his eyes on Jiwon, who’s eyes traveled hurriedly between looking at Hanbin’s hands near his crotch and Hanbin’s intense, lusty gaze.

Jiwon, whose hands had been on Hanbin’s thighs all the while, moved them without letting them lose contact with the surface of Hanbin’s body, stroking along the outer side of Hanbin’s thighs and around to the back.

Jiwon’s hands moved up Hanbin’s back, under his shirt making Hanbin shudder.

Jiwon stopped, and then brought his hands back down.

“Not gonna undress me?” Hanbin asked in a breathy voice.

Jiwon smirked.

“Some other time I guess, right now I’ve got more... important things to attend to.” He said teasingly as he grabbed Hanbin’s ass firmly, startling Hanbin.

Jiwon kept squeezing Hanbin’s buttcheeks with both hands, watching Hanbin’s face as he frowned at him.

“My ass isn’t a toy.” Hanbin said darkly.

“My apologies…” Jiwon chortled and instead let one hand leave Hanbin’s ass cheek and suddenly brought it back to slap Hanbin’s ass.

Hanbin’s eyes widened in surprise, the shock of Jiwon’s hand slapping his ass sent a small shock vibrating through his nether regions and into his already erect cock. 

Hanbin slumped forward, moaning as he moved, his head landing on Jiwon’s shoulder.

Jiwon sucked in his lower lip, just as Hanbin had visibly reacted to the slap a surge of intense pleasure and lust ran like a shock wave through his body.

Hanbin’s head was still on his shoulder so Jiwon tilted his head so that his mouth was closer to Hanbin’s ear.

“Hey… can you touch my cock please, I”m about to go crazy. Like it actually kinda hurts.” His breath hot and moist on Hanbin’s skin, sending a tremble through his body.

Hanbin gulped, but didn’t waste time as he grabbed the front of Jiwon’s pants, hooking his fingers into them and the underwear and yanking the front down.

Jiwon’s cock sprung forth and swayed slightly, Hanbin glancing at it with his forehead on Jiwon’s shoulder, he could see a pearl of pre-cum forming at the tip before he grabbed a hold of it, hearing Jiwon gasp near his ear and feeling his body jolt slightly.

He lifted his left arm and grabbed a hold of the top of the sofa for support.

Hanbin rubbed the cock from tip to hilt several times, enjoying Jiwon’s trembling breath and sudden jolts.

Jiwon’s hands were now rubbing Hanbin’s ass, and with his right hand he slipped his fingers down and into Hanbin’s crack to slid it across his hole through his clothes.

Hanbin grunted loudly into Jiwon’s shoulder, he moved around so that his mouth was against Jiwon’s shoulder and parted his lips to sink his teeth in, he let go of Jiwon’s dick as well.

“Ouch! Why’d you bite me?” Jiwon complained loudly.

‘Don’t tease me.” Hanbin whined squirming slightly, litting his lower body up off of Jiwon’s lap.

“Alright, alright.” Jiwon sounded a little frustrated as he said it, but he turned to kiss the part of Hanbin’s head that he could reach. 

Jiwon let go of Hanbin’s ass with one hand and brought it in between them, grabbing Hanbin’s hand and bringing it back to his aching cock.

“But it’s unfair and cruel to stop..” Jiwon hissed darkly.

“Idiot…” Hanbin breathed.

Once Hanbin closed his hand around his dick, Jiwon placed his hand on the tent in Hanbin’s pants, which had been long neglected.

When Hanbin felt Jiwon touch his groin he yelped loudly, burying his face into the nook of Jiwon’s neck.

Jiwon rubbed the hardness through Hanbin’s pants, there was a wet stain growing where the head of Hanbin’s cock was protruding against the fabric.

Jiwon hooked a finger into Hanbin’s pants and pulled the front down to expose his cock.

Hanbin was wheezing loudly, the heat rising within as Jiwon gently teased his erect member.

Jiwon took a firm hold around the base of the head, running his thumb over the most sensitive part on the underside of the head.

Hanbin moaned loudly against Jiwon’s neck as he started to stroke his cock repeatedly, his thumb always coming up to stroke over the underside of the cockhead, which was almost tipping Hanbin over the edge.

Hanbin’s free hand moved from the sofa back and he reached around to clutch at Jiwon’s left shoulder, it forced him moved closer to Jiwon.

Jiwon followed suit and with his hand still on Hanin’s ass he boosted him to moved even closer until he could feel their hands colliding.

Jiwon let go of Hanbin’s dick and reached out and grabbed Hanbin’s wrist, wriggling his fingers in between so that Hanbin would let go of him.

He then proceeded to take Hanbin’s cock and managed to scoot him even closer so that he could hold both cocks with one hand. 

Hanbin trembled as he felt Jiwon’s pulsating member against his, and he tried to suppress his moans, but it proved hard as Jiwon started to move his hand up and down.

Hanbin couldn’t stop his hips from shaking and he desperately tried to match Jiwon’s pace.

Jiwon also started to rock his hips to thrust upwards, and he also couldn’t hold back his moans.

Hanbin placed his hand together with Jiwon’s, enclosing their cocks even more, but he let Jiwon control the pace. 

It felt almost as if the room itself was getting hotter as they rubbed their dicks together, groaning and shivering.

Hanbin’s fingers were digging into Jiwon’s left shoulder, but Jiwon didn’t even notice, he was to preoccupied by feeling Hanbin so close to him along with the pleasure that it was overriding everything else.

Their ragged breaths moist and guttural as the pleasure intensified with each stroke of their combined members. 

“Ahn… I’m close…” Hanbin hissed against Jiwon’s neck, which made Jiwon’s heart almost jump out of his chest.

“Shit… don’t whisper stuff like that so close to my ear…” Jiwon grunted feeling a wave of intense pleasure almost push him over the brink. 

Hanbin felt like laughing at Jiwon, but he squeezed fimly around their cockheads and stopped the laughter dead in its tracks.

Hanbin couldn’t hold back any longer and he moaned several times and wheezed incoherently.

“I’m.. I… cum… ing..nnn” He moaned loudly as he came, jolting while shooting his load into Jiwon’s hand and onto both of their thighs.

This also sent Jiwon over the edge and he grunted loudly and came right after Hanbin, covering both his hand and their legs in even more cum. 

“Shit…” Jiwon wheezed in between shuddering breaths. 

Hanbin was still sitting in his lap, trembling still, breathing heavily against his shoulder.

“That was good…” Jiwon chuckled while he tried to catch his breath.

He let go of their cocks and brought his hand up to look at it.

“Where do you have some tissues?” Jiwon asked looking around.

Hanbin sat up wordlessly, his face andhest were still flushed from the orgasm, but he leaned over to the side of the sofa and opened the top drawer in a small chest of drawers and pulled the tissue box out.

He gave it to Jiwon who first wiped his hand clean before he dabbed it at their pants, only some came off, but their pants were thoroughly stained.

“We should just wash these right away…” Jiwon suggested as he wrapped the used tissues in a new one.

Hanbin who was busy trying to catch his breath simply nodded against Jiwon’s shoulder.

A loud series off dings coming from Hanbin’s phone made him get up off of Jiwon and he picked up his phone and looked at the screen for a second before he unlocked it.

“What’s up?” Jiwon asked, sitting up straight eyeing Hanbin closely to read him.

“It’s Yunhyeong…” Hanbin fell silent again as he seemed to scroll the messages.

“Just telling me that he had arrived and where he’s gonna be sitting and wondering when I think I’ll get there.” Hanbin grumbled.

‘What the heck do I reply? It’s not me who’s going to meet him.”

“Just relax…” Jiwon said as he got to his feet, he walked to the bathroom and disappeared inside.

Hanbin could hear the faucet being turned on and what was probably the sound of Jiwon washing his hands.

When he came out he found his own phone and started swiping and typing on it.

“What are you doing?” Hanbin frowned at him.

“Asking Donghyuk where he is… where is our little friend waiting?” 

“On a bench near the fountain, facing that flower shop.” Hanbin felt guilty for lying to Yunhyeong, but certainly Donghyuk wouldn’t do anything too crazy.

He grumbled in a low voice to himself, staring at his phone. 

“OK. Reply that it’ll be about 10 more minutes.” Jiwon hurriedly put his phone down and sat down next to Hanbin.

Hanbin sighed deeply, but typed it in and sent it to Yunhyeong, receiving a smiling emoji as a reply.

“Jeez, he’s so old fashioned sometimes…” Hanbin grumbled as he also put his phone down.

There was a long pause where neither of them said anything.

“Soo…” Jiwon began slowly, looking sideways at Hanbin.

There was yet another pause as Hanbin waited for the rest of Jiwon’s sentence.

“Should we… continue this? Perhaps in the shower?” Jiwon suggested, looking hopeful as he waited for Hanbin’s reply.

“No. We’ve just set up our friends and tricked on of them, honestly seeing the texts made it all too real. I don’t think I can do anything until after it’s over.”

Jiwon frowned.

“Didn’t think this would make you this anxious.”

“Neither did I…” Hanbin grumbled, pulling his knees up to his chest.

“Well, how about you go and wash up then?” Jiwon looked a little disappointed, but his smile was soft and warming.

Hanbin stared at Jiwon, watching him as he grabbed the TV-remote and started flicking through the channels. 

“I suppose we could shower together… it saves water…” Hanbin grumbled and got to his feet.

Jiwon chuckled getting to his feet as well.

“Well, I’m not sure about saving water, but I sure do like seeing you naked…” Jiwon smirked broadly as Hanbin blushed and walked off in a huff.

“I swear, sometimes I wonder, it wasn’t long ago you were locking yourself in the closet, now you’re gladly telling me about how you like seeing me… without any clothes on…”

“Naked” Jiwon inserted.

Hanbin grimaced and his face turned even redder.

“Whatever. We can throw everything in the wash while we’re at it.” Hanbin spat and started for the bathroom.

“Yes, sir!” Jiwon exclaimed as he jumped to his feet to follow Hanbin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, sorry about the wait I've had a rough period lately and motivation hasn't been on top. Sadly I don't believe I'll be able to maintain a weekly update schedule, but I'll try and update as often as I can. 
> 
> Thank you for being patient with me, and I hope you'll keep reading this fic.


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